10 books like The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life

By Erving Goffman,

Here are 10 books that authors have personally recommended if you like The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life. Shepherd is a community of 9,000+ authors sharing their favorite books with the world.

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Influence

By Robert B. Cialdini,

Book cover of Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion

Melina Palmer Author Of What Your Employees Need and Can't Tell You

From the list on having more influence at work.

Who am I?

The more I learn about the brain, the more I want to dig in and discover more. Why do we procrastinate? Why do people buy things? Why do some people naturally seem to have more influence than others? As an applied behavioral economist, I love unlocking these topics weekly on The Brainy Business podcast (where each person on this list has been a guest) and sharing those insights with the world. Three of the most downloaded episodes (in over 300) featured increasing influence (and authors showcased here), a key factor of being more impactful in life and at work. Enjoy your newfound influence!

Melina's book list on having more influence at work

Discover why each book is one of Melina's favorite books.

Why did Melina love this book?

We can’t have a list about influence without including the godfather of the space, Robert Cialdini.

The original version of this book featured six principles of persuasion when it came out in 1984 and has sold over 5 million copies around the world. In 2021, Dr. Cialdini released a new and expanded version with a 7th principle of influence. The full set now includes: reciprocity, commitment/consistency, consensus / social proof, authority, liking, scarcity, and (now) unity.

If you have not yet read this book and want to increase your influence at work (and anywhere in your life) Influence is an absolute must read. Yes, it is long at over 500 pages, but (much like Cialdini himself) they are all pure gold.

By Robert B. Cialdini,

Why should I read it?

21 authors picked Influence as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The foundational and wildly popular go-to resource for influence and persuasion-a renowned international bestseller, with over 5 million copies sold-now revised adding: new research, new insights, new examples, and online applications.

In the new edition of this highly acclaimed bestseller, Robert Cialdini-New York Times bestselling author of Pre-Suasion and the seminal expert in the fields of influence and persuasion-explains the psychology of why people say yes and how to apply these insights ethically in business and everyday settings. Using memorable stories and relatable examples, Cialdini makes this crucially important subject surprisingly easy. With Cialdini as a guide, you don't have…


About Looking

By John Berger,

Book cover of About Looking

Sallie Tisdale Author Of The Lie about the Truck: Survivor, Reality TV, and the Endless Gaze

From the list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror.

Who am I?

As a writer, I’ve always been interested in ambiguity and ambivalence. How does that apply to the self? What does it mean to present myself to others? How do I appear to the world and how close is that to what I see myself to be? Are we ever truly seen—or willing to be seen? In a world where cameras exist everywhere and we are encouraged to record rather than simply be, how do we look in a mirror? Hannah Arendt said that we could tell reality from falsehood because reality endures. But I feel that nothing I experience endures; nothing remains the same, including the reflection. If anything lasts, it may be my own make-believe. Everything I write is, in some way, this question. Who is that?

Sallie's book list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror

Discover why each book is one of Sallie's favorite books.

Why did Sallie love this book?

This is a book of essays about the act of looking, especially looking at photographs and paintings and animals and other people. Thus these are essays about history, memory, suffering, beauty, and the self. Berger had a generous spirit; he wrote often about the lives of peasants and spent the last forty years of his life in rural France. Berger gazed upon the world in all its forms with composure and curiosity. 

By John Berger,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked About Looking as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

As a novelist, essayist, and cultural historian, John Berger is a writer of dazzling eloquence and arresting insight whose work amounts to a subtle, powerful critique of the canons of our civilization. In About Looking he explores our role as observers to reveal new layers of meaning in what we see. How do the animals we look at in zoos remind us of a relationship between man and beast all but lost in the twentieth century? What is it about looking at war photographs that doubles their already potent violence? How do the nudes of Rodin betray the threats to…


Book cover of Autobiography of a Face

Carol Fiore Author Of Flight through Fire

From the list on on loss that do more than make us cry.

Who am I?

Loss, with its many contours, finds us all. For me, it came quite unexpectedly. During a long decade of profound grieving, I found inspiration in books. Through real characters and fictional ones, I learned and questioned and found strength. Adversity should evoke more than sadness. When we cheer for the characters on the page, we learn about ourselves. These are books that have helped me dig deeper into my own loss and to live fuller. I start with The Right Stuff because I know what it means to be married to a test pilot and to get the knock on the door. Loss does not have to be the end.

Carol's book list on on loss that do more than make us cry

Discover why each book is one of Carol's favorite books.

Why did Carol love this book?

Perhaps it takes a gifted poet to write about loneliness and pain in a way that is free of self-pity. Lucy Grealy is that poet, and this is the book I recommend in my grief self-help workbook (published in 2014).

Ms. Grealy, diagnosed with cancer at only 9, lost a third of her jaw and eventually underwent 30 torturous surgeries. She endured not only ridicule from classmates, but her own feelings of ugliness and rejection. This memoir is full of wit, insight, and beautifully crafted sentences that spare the reader from much of the frightening details. If ever there was a book that made you dig deeper for your own buried strength, this is it.

Lucy said before her death that she didn’t want to be anyone’s inspiration or role model; she wanted to be recognized as a serious writer. She did both.

I. Love. This. Book.

By Lucy Grealy,

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked Autobiography of a Face as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A New York Times Notable Book

"Grealy has turned her misfortune into a book that is engaging and engrossing, a story of grace as well as cruelty, and a demonstration of her own wit and style and class."—Washington Post Book World

“It is impossible to read Autobiography of a Face without having your consciousness raised forever.” – Mirabella

In this celebrated memoir and exploration of identity, cancer transforms the author’s face, childhood, and the rest of her life.

At age nine, Lucy Grealy was diagnosed with a potentially terminal cancer. When she returned to school with a third of her…


Life of the Mind

By Hannah Arendt,

Book cover of Life of the Mind: One/Thinking, Two/Willing

Sallie Tisdale Author Of The Lie about the Truck: Survivor, Reality TV, and the Endless Gaze

From the list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror.

Who am I?

As a writer, I’ve always been interested in ambiguity and ambivalence. How does that apply to the self? What does it mean to present myself to others? How do I appear to the world and how close is that to what I see myself to be? Are we ever truly seen—or willing to be seen? In a world where cameras exist everywhere and we are encouraged to record rather than simply be, how do we look in a mirror? Hannah Arendt said that we could tell reality from falsehood because reality endures. But I feel that nothing I experience endures; nothing remains the same, including the reflection. If anything lasts, it may be my own make-believe. Everything I write is, in some way, this question. Who is that?

Sallie's book list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror

Discover why each book is one of Sallie's favorite books.

Why did Sallie love this book?

The relentless and erudite work of Arendt never ceases to challenge me. In the books included here—Thinking and Willing—she explores what it means that the self knows itself to be a self, and how that knowledge refracts and splits upon encountering others, and then changes when returning to solitude again. I read her knowing that she has not just considered but felt her ideas. “To be alive means to be possessed by an urge toward self-display. . . .Up to a point we can choose how to appear to others.”

By Hannah Arendt,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Life of the Mind as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The most intriguing…and thought-provoking book that Hannah Arendt wrote (The New York Times Book Review), The Life of the Mind is the final work by the political theorist, philosopher, and feminist thinker.This fascinating book investigates thought itself as it exists in contemplative life. In a shift from Arendt's previous writings, most of which focus on the world outside the mind, this is an exploration of the mind's activities she considered to be the most fundamental. The result is a rich, challenging analysis of human mental activity in terms of thinking, willing, and judging.


Females

By Andrea Long Chu,

Book cover of Females

Sallie Tisdale Author Of The Lie about the Truck: Survivor, Reality TV, and the Endless Gaze

From the list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror.

Who am I?

As a writer, I’ve always been interested in ambiguity and ambivalence. How does that apply to the self? What does it mean to present myself to others? How do I appear to the world and how close is that to what I see myself to be? Are we ever truly seen—or willing to be seen? In a world where cameras exist everywhere and we are encouraged to record rather than simply be, how do we look in a mirror? Hannah Arendt said that we could tell reality from falsehood because reality endures. But I feel that nothing I experience endures; nothing remains the same, including the reflection. If anything lasts, it may be my own make-believe. Everything I write is, in some way, this question. Who is that?

Sallie's book list on the existential crisis of looking in a mirror

Discover why each book is one of Sallie's favorite books.

Why did Sallie love this book?

A short, powerful investigation of how we construct and succumb to the lies of gender. Chu explores our fears of desire and how we allow politics to corrupt identity, believing gender to be so constructed that it can only be given and not created. Female is a quality we all carry, whatever label we use. Chu forces the reader to look in the mirror with a question instead of a statement, always uncertain about who that person really is. 

By Andrea Long Chu,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Females as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"Everyone is female, and everyone hates it."

So begins Andrea Long Chu's genre-defying investigation into sex and lies, desperate artists and reckless politics, the smothering embrace of gender and the punishing force of desire.

Drawing inspiration from a forgotten play by Valerie Solanas-the woman who wrote the SCUM Manifesto and shot Andy Warhol-Chu aims her searing wit and surgical intuition at targets ranging from performance art to psychoanalysis, incels to porn, and even feminists like herself. Each step of the way she defends the indefensible claim that femaleness is less a biological state of women and more a fatal existential…


Snow Crash

By Neal Stephenson,

Book cover of Snow Crash

Ronnie D. Lipschutz Author Of Political Economy, Capitalism, and Popular Culture

From the list on explaining how capitalism works.

Who am I?

I am a product of Sputnik and the threat of nuclear war. Both turned me into a long-time reader of science fiction and a perpetual student in trying to understand how the world works and why? If we have free will, why do so many things seem to be predetermined? If we are rational beings, why do so many of our choices seem so absurd? And if a new world is possible, why can’t we bring it into existence? I was a professor of politics for 30 years (and I was respected! See “Soylent Green.”) and most of my research and writing try to answer these questions.

Ronnie's book list on explaining how capitalism works

Discover why each book is one of Ronnie's favorite books.

Why did Ronnie love this book?

Snow Crash was written as the Cold War came to an end and imagines how globalization and cyberspace might develop across the United States.

There is not much left of the U.S. besides the “Feds,” who can barely keep their act together. There are only four things the United States can do better than anyone else: music, movies, microcode, and high-speed pizza delivery. 

The country is littered with FOQNEs, Franchise-Organized Quasi-National Entities, and Burbclaves, which are thematic near-sovereign, gated communities. And, by the way, this is where Zuckerberg got the term “Metaverse.” Stephenson should sue.

By Neal Stephenson,

Why should I read it?

10 authors picked Snow Crash as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The “brilliantly realized” (The New York Times Book Review) breakthrough novel from visionary author Neal Stephenson, a modern classic that predicted the metaverse and inspired generations of Silicon Valley innovators

Hiro lives in a Los Angeles where franchises line the freeway as far as the eye can see. The only relief from the sea of logos is within the autonomous city-states, where law-abiding citizens don’t dare leave their mansions.

Hiro delivers pizza to the mansions for a living, defending his pies from marauders when necessary with a matched set of samurai swords. His home is a shared 20 X 30…


Why We Buy

By Paco Underhill,

Book cover of Why We Buy: The Science of Shopping

Mindy Weinstein Author Of The Power of Scarcity: Leveraging Urgency and Demand to Influence Customer Decisions

From the list on marketing mastery to better understand customers.

Who am I?

Simply put, I am a marketer (for over two decades). Yet, I am fascinated with the human brain. In my opinion, the two go together. To create powerful marketing messages, we must understand the mind of our customers. While working on my doctorate in general psychology, I was able to dive deep into consumer behavior and the psychological factors that drive us. All of my recommended books touch on psychology in some way or another and will teach you how to motivate your customers to take action.

Mindy's book list on marketing mastery to better understand customers

Discover why each book is one of Mindy's favorite books.

Why did Mindy love this book?

I read this book on an airplane and was asked by the person next to me why I needed to learn about why I buy things. Well, this book is for anyone interested in understanding consumer behavior and the psychology of shopping. It’s an in-depth exploration of how shoppers interact with products and environments and provides valuable insights into how businesses can improve their sales and customer satisfaction. Underhill backs up his observations with a wealth of research and data. 

By Paco Underhill,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Why We Buy as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Synopsis coming soon.......


Nudge

By Richard H. Thaler, Cass R. Sunstein,

Book cover of Nudge

Linda Ginzel Author Of Choosing Leadership: How to Create a Better Future by Building Your Courage, Capacity, and Wisdom

From the list on leadership that don’t have leadership in the title.

Who am I?

I am a lifelong educator who believes that everyone can create a better future by changing behaviors, practicing leadership skills, and improving outcomes across time and place—at home, work, and community. If you believe in lifelong learning, join me in elevating the courage, capacity, and wisdom of people everywhere through Choosing Leadership. This book is an accessible, educational tool that provides a structured approach combining individual written reflection with discussion to create collective wisdom in groups. Together, we can change the global conversation about leadership—from heroic mythic beings called “Leaders” to diverse human beings that I call “Champions.”

Linda's book list on leadership that don’t have leadership in the title

Discover why each book is one of Linda's favorite books.

Why did Linda love this book?

This is the quintessential behavioral economics book by The University of Chicago’s most dynamic duo.

Leadership is all about change and Nudge (not to be confused with the Yiddish word, Noogde) has done more than most any other book to change both the academic world of economics and global practices.

The application of social psychology at the individual, group, and organizational levels is the magic behind the new field of behavioral economics. 

By Richard H. Thaler, Cass R. Sunstein,

Why should I read it?

4 authors picked Nudge as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

*Once again a New York Times bestseller! First the original edition, and now the new Final Edition*

An essential new edition revised and updated from cover to cover of one of the most important books of the last two decades, by Nobel Prize winner Richard H. Thaler and Cass R. Sunstein

More than 2 million copies sold

Since the original publication of Nudge more than a decade ago, the title has entered the vocabulary of businesspeople, policy makers, engaged citizens, and consumers everywhere. The book has given rise to more than 400 "nudge units" in governments around the world and…


Book cover of Queuing for Beginners: The Story of Daily Life From Breakfast to Bedtime

Tim Newburn Author Of Orderly Britain: How Britain has resolved everyday problems, from dog fouling to double parking

From the list on the changing nature of our everyday lives.

Who am I?

I’m a criminologist who is increasingly at least as interested in social order as I am in crime. In part I think this can be expressed as a concern with what glues us together rather than what pulls us apart. What particularly makes me smile, and draws me in, is the ability that some writers and researchers have to find the fascinating and the remarkable in the everyday. Whether it be what we wear, how we speak, or when we sleep, there is just as much to learn about our contemporary society from such matters as there is from who’s in parliament or how our financial institutions are behaving. 

Tim's book list on the changing nature of our everyday lives

Discover why each book is one of Tim's favorite books.

Why did Tim love this book?

I think Joe Moran is one of the most interesting authors writing about modern life. He is interested in the ordinary and the mundane, those things you might (probably would) miss if they weren’t drawn to your attention. This beautifully written book has sixteen chapters which begin with breakfast (do you know where the idea of a ‘full English’ came from?), and takes us on a journey that includes the morning commute, the changing status of the working lunch (increasingly now experienced as ‘dining al desko’) our evening eating and viewing habits, all the way through to turning in at the end of the day (when did we switch to duvets?). An easy read which in its own way is also quite profound.

By Joe Moran,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Queuing for Beginners as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Radio 4 Book of the Week from 28th May. We spend our days catching buses and trains, tapping away at computers, shopping, queuing, lying on sofas... But we know almost nothing about these activities. Exploring the history of these subjects as they come up during a typical day, starting with breakfast and ending with bedtime, Joe Moran shows that they conceal all kinds of hidden histories and meanings. By looking closely at the normally unobserved, he tells a story about social and cultural change in Britain and the Western world, in particular since the Second World War. And along the…


Book cover of Species of Spaces and Other Pieces

Tim Newburn Author Of Orderly Britain: How Britain has resolved everyday problems, from dog fouling to double parking

From the list on the changing nature of our everyday lives.

Who am I?

I’m a criminologist who is increasingly at least as interested in social order as I am in crime. In part I think this can be expressed as a concern with what glues us together rather than what pulls us apart. What particularly makes me smile, and draws me in, is the ability that some writers and researchers have to find the fascinating and the remarkable in the everyday. Whether it be what we wear, how we speak, or when we sleep, there is just as much to learn about our contemporary society from such matters as there is from who’s in parliament or how our financial institutions are behaving. 

Tim's book list on the changing nature of our everyday lives

Discover why each book is one of Tim's favorite books.

Why did Tim love this book?

I first came across Georges Perec via his novels. Many (most) of these are experimental – a word that often puts me off – but their cleverness is additional to great writing and storytelling. One of his novels, for example – La Disparition (A Void) is written entirely without the letter ‘e’ as, remarkably, is the English translation! Species of Spaces is a collection of non-fiction essays in which he encourages us to look, to observe what is around us, to become anthropologists of the everyday. What might we find? Yes, we lie on beds. But, as Perec observes, this is highly unusual as they’re one of the very few places where we adopt a horizontal posture, and the only general one (the others are things like operating tables, beaches, psychiatrists’ couches. Perec focuses on what he calls the ‘infra-ordinary’ (as opposed to extraordinary)  and offers something remarkable on…

By Georges Perec,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Species of Spaces and Other Pieces as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Georges Perec produced some of the most entertaining and spirited essays of his age. His literary output was amazingly varied in form and style and this generous selection of Perec's non-fictional work also demonstrates his characteristic lightness of touch, wry humour and accessibility.


5 book lists we think you will like!

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