100 books like Being Essential

This book is an instant classic. It took me years to finish reading it because I did not want it to end.

Kimmerer’s writing appealed to the dreamer in me while also explaining the science of the natural world in ways that were unforgettable. This beautifully written book connected me to my physical home and the people around me. I will come back to it again and again. 

This is another counter-intuitive recommendation, but I find I learn a lot about leading by getting outside the confines of leadership books.

Heller is a pioneer in social design, solving complex challenges by working with communities rather than doing something to them. The emphasis on listening and iterating solutions are directly applicable to leading through crisis and change. The process she outlines is approachable and her stories compelling. My copy has lots of highlighting.

For me, Heller’s approach takes away the pressure of trying to have all the answers by reminding me that when you ask the right questions and involve the right people, the answers will emerge. 

My work on crisis leadership uses applied neuroscience to help people get “smarter their brains” by learning to work with and, in some cases counteracting, their instinctual reactions and ingrained patterns.

Jensen, who has worked with elite athletes as well as executives, draws on some of the same science (and more) in a practical approach to how to handle pressure. He goes through how to use breathing to tame anxiety and increase focus.

One insight I’ve found particularly useful is remembering what’s not at stake in a high-stakes situation. No matter what happens, your family, friends, and pets will still love and support you, for example. Knowing what you can count on makes a seemingly overwhelming challenge more manageable.

Ah, there is nothing more quintessentially freelance than riding the highs and lows.

Some months, clients are stampeding to work with you and other months you pitch your projects to a resounding chorus of crickets. This book about thriving in uncertainty helped me ground myself in moments of transition (a.k.a. always).

It also helped me understand that the more unique my career was, the better, because it helps me differentiate myself from the pack. Plus the book reads like a warm hug, and that’s exactly what you want when, well, everything is in flux. 

Why do women feel like we need to invite everyone to every party, throw weddings that are closer to our parents’ style than our own, and show up to networking nights that we know we won’t get anything out of?

I know this book is meant to be about hosting gatherings, but I’ve applied the principles to nearly everything I do in work and hobbies to add more intention, impact, and fulfillment. I’ve changed the way I sit at restaurants to encourage deeper conversations with friends. I’ve started to purposefully not invite certain people to certain parties since I know it would change the dynamic negatively for others. I’ve embraced the idea of “pop-up rules” at every event I host and expect guests to follow them so that the event is transformative and not boring.

Since reading Priya’s incredible framework, I’ve led extremely successful monthly events for my community, started… show more.

Just Listen has one of my favorite male protagonists of all time, the guy I wish I would have met in high school. As a music-head, I also love the way Annabel and Owen bond over their favorite songs. Getting over an assault requires support. On one hand, you have to be incredibly strong to tell the truth about what happened. But once you tell your people, they hold you up as you walk through healing. Telling is so hard, but support is key.

If you’ve been alive longer than 15 minutes, you’ve probably suffered a setback. I know I have! When hopes and dreams turn into a nightmare, it may seem like life is over and there’s no way out. But this book reminds me that God is in the business of resurrecting dead visions, and He has already prepared a comeback. Tim shares the strategies and motivation I needed to turn tragedy into triumph! 

Every comedy needs a truly memorable comedy scene and once you’ve read this book, you will never look at any birthday cake with candles in quite the same way again.

This plot is based on of my favourite setups – grown up siblings being forced to spend time in their family home together. In this case, they are mourning their recently deceased Dad. The seven-day stay is long enough for all the niceties to wear off and the real sibling rivalries, unresolved arguments, and tensions to surface and here, they are properly aired and almost resolved.

The very funny side and the searingly painful side are both so well done. If your sibs and in-laws are crazy or crazy-annoying, Tropper will make sure you know you are not alone. 

There’s a reason this book has sold over 1 million copies. All of us, divorced or not, benefit when we learn how to recognize damaging thoughts and keep them from coloring our lives. This is especially true when dealing with the negative and haunting thoughts that can come with divorce.

Your thoughts can determine whether you grieve forever or find a new life full of peace and joy. Like Chapter 6 in my book, Peace after Divorce, this book embraces the concept of Proverbs 23:7; “For as a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” Learning to win the battles in your mind represents one component of healing from divorce.

A big part of lifelong learning involves experimenting, trying new things, and picking up new skills. I must confess this can be challenging for me; I’m one of those people who sometimes gets frustrated or embarrassed when I try something new and find it doesn’t come easily to me. Maybe you’re the same way--if so, all the more reason to take inspiration from Vanderbilt’s book, which chronicles his efforts to learn how to play chess, surf, sing, juggle, and more. Woven in with those entertaining experiences are larger lessons about how we learn, and why it’s so beneficial to keep doing so. In the hands of a less skilled writer, a book like this--in which a journalist tries on a series of new hats--might seem gimmicky. But Vanderbilt is an insightful observer and storyteller who can even make traffic fascinating (that was the subject of a previous book of his,… show more.