100 books like Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers

By Karyl McBride,

Here are 100 books that Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers fans have personally recommended if you like Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. Shepherd is a community of 12,000+ authors and super readers sharing their favorite books with the world.

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Book cover of Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

Nadine Macaluso Author Of Run Like Hell: A Therapist's Guide to Recognizing, Escaping, and Healing from Trauma Bonds

From my list on trauma bonds.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, and I also have my Ph.D. in somatic psychotherapy. In my clinical practice, I noticed how many smart, kind women were trapped in trauma bonds. So, I researched the topic and decided to write a book to help women understand the complex psychological process of trauma bonds and how to recover from coercive control and abuse. Also, my ex-husband is the "Wolf of Wall Street", so I have personal experience of a trauma bond as well.

Nadine's book list on trauma bonds

Nadine Macaluso Why did Nadine love this book?

This is the best book ever written about the psychology of the male perpetrator in a trauma bond.

In this book, I was able to see into the mind of an abuser and no longer make excuses for them. I love how the author described the different types of abusers and how he explained how to leave a trauma bond.

I refer this book to every one of my patients.

By Lundy Bancroft,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft—a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men—uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued, and to find ways to get free of an abusive relationship.

He says he loves you. So...why does he do that?
 
You’ve asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men—and change your life. In Why Does He Do That? you will learn about:
 
• The early warning signs of abuse
• The nature of abusive…


Book cover of The Verbally Abusive Relationship, How to Recognize It and How to Respond

Caroline Abbott Author Of A Journey Through Emotional Abuse: From Bondage to Freedom

From my list on being emotionally abused.

Why am I passionate about this?

I was in an emotionally abusive marriage for 20 years but didn’t realize what was happening to me. I tried to twist myself into a perfectly shaped pretzel to make my husband happy. It didn’t work. Reading some of these books gave me the courage to seek a restraining order and divorce my husband. Since then, I became a domestic violence advocate, author, blogger, and mental health counselor. 

Caroline's book list on being emotionally abused

Caroline Abbott Why did Caroline love this book?

When I was in my emotionally abusive marriage, I didn’t fully realize I was being abused. I finally called the National Domestic Violence Hotline, and they recommended this book. It does an excellent job of explaining what verbal/ emotional abuse is, and how to recognize it. Reading this book set me on the path to finally getting the help I needed and getting free from my abuser.

By Patricia Evans,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Verbally Abusive Relationship, How to Recognize It and How to Respond as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

You deserve respect.

In this fully expanded and updated third edition of the bestselling classic, you learn why verbal abuse is more widespread than ever, and how you can deal with it. You'll get more of the answers you need to recognize abuse when it happens, respond to abusers safely and appropriately, and most important, lead a happier, healthier life.

In two all-new chapters, Evans reveals the Outside Stresses driving the rise in verbal abuse - and shows you how you can mitigate the devastating effects on your relationships. She also outlines the Levels of Abuse that characterize this kind…


Book cover of Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

Healey E. Ikerd Author Of Changing Your Feelings: A Workbook for Anxiety and Worry from a Christian Perspective

From my list on Christians determined to be more mentally healthy.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a licensed therapist who has been in the mental health field for over 15 years. I believe that God wants his followers to be mentally healthy! We are better witnesses to Him when we think and act in ways that reflect biblical principles. This is why I am a big fan of books that help me think and act more wisely and that also helps me follow God more deeply. Working through our mental ‘stuff’ and following God well are greatly intertwined. Whether in person or by recommending books, I love to be a part of that process with people.

Healey's book list on Christians determined to be more mentally healthy

Healey E. Ikerd Why did Healey love this book?

I have read this book so many times. It is a classic! For those of us who have struggled with saying yes to everything, I was so thankful that I found this book. 

A heart of compassion and care can set you up for burnout, resentment, and going in directions that God doesn’t want you to go. The authors are brilliant, and they help Christians learn that it is okay to say No and that is actually good for us and others. Saying No when appropriate is a sign of good mental health.

By Henry Cloud, John Townsend,

Why should I read it?

4 authors picked Boundaries as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Join the millions who have learned how to take control of their lives by setting healthy boundaries with their spouses, children, friends, parents, coworkers, and even themselves, in order to live life to the fullest.

Do you feel like your life has spiraled out of control? Have you focused so much on being loving and unselfish that you've forgotten your own limits? Do you find yourself taking responsibility for other people's feelings and problems? In Boundaries, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend teach you the ins and outs of setting the boundaries that will transform your daily life.

Boundaries, a…


Book cover of A Cry for Justice: How the Evil of Domestic Abuse Hides in Your Church

Caroline Abbott Author Of A Journey Through Emotional Abuse: From Bondage to Freedom

From my list on being emotionally abused.

Why am I passionate about this?

I was in an emotionally abusive marriage for 20 years but didn’t realize what was happening to me. I tried to twist myself into a perfectly shaped pretzel to make my husband happy. It didn’t work. Reading some of these books gave me the courage to seek a restraining order and divorce my husband. Since then, I became a domestic violence advocate, author, blogger, and mental health counselor. 

Caroline's book list on being emotionally abused

Caroline Abbott Why did Caroline love this book?

When I was in the process of leaving my abusive husband, I sought help from my church. Sadly, my pastors had no idea what they were dealing with. Instead of helping me, they sided with my abuser. This book, written by a pastor, helps churches understand the evil that abusers perpetrate, and how they can and should help the abused partner.

By Jeff Crippen, Anna Wood,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked A Cry for Justice as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Abuse in the Church of Jesus Christ!

In many Christian circles this may be a taboo subject--spoken of in hushed tones or behind closed doors. But it is a very real problem that must be brought into the light of Scripture.

Abuse in the church takes different forms; but it is alive and active even in "nice" families in our churches. Typically, the abuser is male, usually a husband--and his character is that of a manipulating deceiver. Countless women and children--even many faithful pastors--have been abused by these deceivers.

Have you, or someone you know, been a victim? Has an…


Book cover of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk

Jessica L. Borelli Author Of Nature Meets Nurture: Science-Based Strategies for Raising Resilient Kids

From my list on people who want to connect with their child.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve been fascinated by relationships since I was a kid. I grew up a keen observer of the relationships in my own family, mostly focused on the way in which the dynamics were difficult for me. This led me to develop a strong interest in psychology, a passion I pursued in my undergraduate education. I became acutely intrigued by an idea a professor exposed me to early on – that experiences of safety and security within attachment relationships are essential in order for children to thrive, and that without safety/security, they can experience chronic struggles. This early interest paved the way for what developed into my career as a psychology professor and therapist.

Jessica's book list on people who want to connect with their child

Jessica L. Borelli Why did Jessica love this book?

This book is the best, hands-on guide for how to talk to children that I have ever seen. It’s kind of like a how-to-talk to children for dummies.

It’s as though the authors spent years dissecting every aspect of what makes conversations between adults and kids go well and what makes them flop and then put that down in a book. And then the authors convey this information so clearly and concretely, including through the use of cartoons and worksheets.

The book also clearly exposes (in a humorous, light-hearted way) why certain ways of talking to kids fail. This is an old book but one I wish I had discovered before I had my own kids. I now intend to give it to all of my clients and friends when they become new parents. 

By Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish,

Why should I read it?

6 authors picked How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

30th Anniversary Edition updated with new insights from the next generation. You can stop fighting with your children! Here is the bestselling book that will give you the know-how you need to be more effective with your children--and more supportive of yourself. Enthusiastically praised by parents and professionals around the world, the down-to-earth, respectful approach of Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish makes relationships with children of all ages less stressful and more rewarding. Now, in this thirtieth-anniversary edition, these award-winning experts share their latest insights and suggestions based on feedback they've received over the years. Their methods of communication--illustrated with…


Book cover of The Burning Light of Two Stars: A Mother-Daughter Story

Karen C.L. Anderson Author Of You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing Generational Trauma and Shame

From my list on difficult mother/adult daughter relationships.

Why am I passionate about this?

In the 1980s, my mother “divorced” her mother with a letter in the mail. In 2010 I did the same via email. I thought it was just my dysfunctional family, but come to find out, mother-adult daughter estrangement is not unusual and difficult mother-daughter relationships don’t happen in a vacuum, they happen in the context of patriarchy, white supremacy, internalized misogyny, and other oppressive systems. Through therapy and, later, when I trained to be a life coach, allllll my “mother stuff” came up. The tools and practices I learned and developed were so helpful to me, I couldn’t keep them to myself. 

Karen's book list on difficult mother/adult daughter relationships

Karen C.L. Anderson Why did Karen love this book?

Laura Davis hits it out of the park with this epically honest and human memoir.

In it, she tells the story of how, after decades of estrangement due to family abuse and incest, which her mother denied, she decides to care for her elderly mother. I believe any woman will find value, wisdom, and relief in The Burning Light of Two Stars, but it is especially poignant for mothers and adult daughters who have struggled, are estranged, and/or are navigating reconciliation.

It is in revealing and speaking the truth, that healing, even when it's messy and emotional, can take place. 

By Laura Davis,

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked The Burning Light of Two Stars as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"Caregiving an elderly parent, especially against the backdrop of a difficult shared past, can be a bruising spiritual ordeal. We who must travel this territory don't need any more sentimental narratives about it. What we do need is the healing medicine of truth-telling, and Laura Davis brilliantly and generously gives it to us. I literally could not put this book down."

—Katy Butler, bestselling author of Knocking on Heaven's Door and The Art of Dying Well

This riveting memoir by Laura Davis, the author of The Courage to Heal, examines the endurance of mother-daughter love, how memory protects and betrays…


Book cover of Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

Meg Arroll Author Of Tiny Traumas: When You Don't Know What's Wrong, but Nothing Feels Quite Right

From my list on helping you understand why you feel the way you fee.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a psychologist, yet I am also a human being with real, complex, and, at times, disturbing thoughts and feelings. I would say I’ve learnt more from my own experiences and those shared by others than any training or qualifications. I never tire of listening to these real-life narratives, which are full of more color and depth than our rudimentary single-word emotion labels describe. I gather these stories up to feed my emotobiome (our microscopic inner world of feelings) along with the books and learnings from my list. I hope you’ll join me on this rollercoaster ride through human feelings–I wouldn’t miss it for the world. 

Meg's book list on helping you understand why you feel the way you fee

Meg Arroll Why did Meg love this book?

I’m not sure I could love this book anymore–I often speak about the importance of accepting and working through negative emotions and that there are no inherently “bad” feelings, but this book expresses the importance of the difficult seasons we experience in life in an utterly breathtaking and encompassing way.

This is more of a memoir than a scientific book that wraps you in a warm embrace of personal narrative, like talking to a dear friend after a heartbreak. With the inclusion of historical and anthropological examples of “wintering,” this book beautifully takes a stance against toxic positivity and why it’s ok not to be ok. 

By Katherine May,

Why should I read it?

5 authors picked Wintering as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER
BBC RADIO 4 BOOK OF THE WEEK

'A beautiful, gentle exploration of the dark season of life and the light of spring that eventually follows' RAYNOR WINN

'My favourite book of the last five years' CAITLIN MORAN

Wintering is a poignant and comforting meditation on the fallow periods of life, times when we must retreat to care for and repair ourselves. Katherine May thoughtfully shows us how to come through these times with the wisdom of knowing that, like the seasons, our winters and summers are the ebb and flow of life.

'Every bit as beautiful…


Book cover of Geek Love

Alex Dolan Author Of The Euthanist

From my list on female protagonists who you hate to root for.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m obsessed with the exploration of what it means to be a human being. We’re coming into an era where we see more characters who aren’t good or evil but both—they possess the potential to save someone from jumping off a bridge one day and beating someone the next. We’re all capable of the greatest acts of kindness and the most abominable atrocities imaginable. I believe we need to be reminded of that fact so that when there comes a time when we can decide whether to hurt or to help someone, we become the better version of ourselves and make the right decision.

Alex's book list on female protagonists who you hate to root for

Alex Dolan Why did Alex love this book?

I know, I know…this is a book you’re either going to love or hate, and it’s probably on a lot of lists. I love this book because before it was as common to “break the rules” and write frankly about taboo subjects, Katherine Dunn dove headfirst into an ocean of taboo and told a story that’s as exquisitely heart-wrenching as it is ghastly.

Despite her flaws (and I mean flaws in character–I don’t consider her physical traits to be flawed at all), the protagonist, Oly, is driven by devotion to her family as much as anything.

By Katherine Dunn,

Why should I read it?

6 authors picked Geek Love as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A National Book Award Finalist: This 'wonderfully descriptive' novel from an author with a 'tremendous imagination' tells the unforgettable story of the Binewskis, a carny family whose mater- and paterfamilias have bred their own exhibit of human oddities. (The New York Times Book Review)

The Binewskis arex a circus-geek family whose matriarch and patriarch have bred their own exhibit of human oddities (with the help of amphetamine, arsenic, and radioisotopes). Their offspring include Arturo the Aquaboy, who has flippers for limbs and a megalomaniac ambition worthy of Genghis Khan, Iphy and Elly, the lissome Siamese twins, albino hunchback Oly, and…


Book cover of The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence

Anna E. Hampton Author Of Facing Danger: A Guide Through Risk

From my list on navigate danger in humanitarian work.

Why am I passionate about this?

I went to Afghanistan under the first Taliban government as a humanitarian aid worker. During the following decade, I experienced inadequate emotional, mental, and theological support from those who had sent me out. I began to research the field of risk and found a wealth of literature on how humans make decisions, how we see (or don’t see) danger, how to manage risk and fear, and more. We ignore the best practices and common sense of these fields to our peril. I am passionate about helping people not feel isolated and alone when they choose to serve in dangerous situations.

Anna's book list on navigate danger in humanitarian work

Anna E. Hampton Why did Anna love this book?

Reading this book a second time, I felt my anger growing from a lifetime of hearing the Church’s teaching on fear: “Ignore it.” This is at least negligence and, at worst, abuse. De Becker makes it abundantly clear that we should listen to our fear (he differentiates it from anxiety) and learn to trust the inner voice (intuition).

We are “experts” in our situation, and he skillfully showed me how to listen to myself and see the signs of danger. I realize I need to re-read the final chapter to integrate the common wisdom of knowing myself, seeing danger, and understanding how fear works. It is possible to have faith in God, manage my fear, and more likely avoid violence without resorting to trite spiritual naivete or blind faith in God.

By Gavin de Becker,

Why should I read it?

4 authors picked The Gift of Fear as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In this empowering book, Gavin de Becker, the man Oprah Winfrey calls the US' leading expert on violent behaviour, shows you how to spot even subtle signs of danger - before it's too late. Shattering the myth that most violent acts are unpredictable, de Becker, whose clients include top Hollywood stars and government agencies, offers specific ways to protect yourself and those you love, including: how to act when approached by a stranger; when you should fear someone close to you; what to do if you are being stalked; how to uncover the source of anonymous threats or phone calls;…


Book cover of Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples

Julie A. Mullen and Mike D. Rodgers Jr. Author Of The Island

From my list on cultivating a fulfilling life-long relationship.

Why are we passionate about this?

We are a couple with a combined 70 years worth of relationship experience. We certainly know ‘what not to do.’ What makes us relationship experts is having a relationship that is as exciting today (after more than 6 years together) as it was from day one! We never argue, we have tremendous passion, we never name-call, we show 100% respect every day, and we have 100% connectivity. This does not mean we don’t have disagreements. It means we handle them without arguing. Since experiencing a relationship we never imagined was possible, we want to share with others how to get it and keep it ongoing.

Julie and Mike's book list on cultivating a fulfilling life-long relationship

Julie A. Mullen and Mike D. Rodgers Jr. Why did Julie and Mike love this book?

I was intrigued by the ideas about why we chose our partners in the first place. I discovered ways to have more compatibility in relationships. This book opened my mind to aspects I had not considered before. Those realizations caused positive shifts in behavior.

And… I had a much better understanding of why my partner approached things the way he did.

By Harville Hendrix, Helen Lakelly Hunt,

Why should I read it?

5 authors picked Getting the Love You Want as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In Getting the Love You Want, Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen Hunt offer the relationship skills that have helped millions of couples replace confrontation and criticism with a process of mutual support that facilitates healing and growth at any stage of a relationship. This extraordinary practical guide describes the revolutionary technique that combines a number of disciplines - including the behavioural sciences, depth psychology, social learning theory, Gestalt therapy, and interpersonal neurosciences, among others - to create a program that transforms conflict into creative tension that deepens connection and renews passion.

In a new forward and chapter, Hendrix and…


Book cover of Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
Book cover of The Verbally Abusive Relationship, How to Recognize It and How to Respond
Book cover of Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

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