100 books like How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk

This book starts with an interesting premise, that the U.S. is a society that favors Extroverts over Introverts. 

The author cites academic research and data from her own experiences to demonstrate how we moved from a society that valued character over personality, to one that lauds the Extroversion Ideal…at school, at work, and other public venues. This book made me think hard about how my perceptions of others might be influenced by my assumptions about what Extroverts and Introverts bring to the table.

I’ve found so much value in this book; it’s one of my most recommended titles to both friends and clients.

It never ceases to amaze me how many people feel “not good enough” and the impact this has on our lives. Some of the most challenging feelings, such as guilt and shame, frequently emerge out of complex early life family dynamics, and more subtle forms of emotional neglect associated with narcissistic personality disorder can be incredibly difficult to disentangle.

The ”a-ha” moments in this book, especially emerging from the case studies, shone a light on feelings of insignificance and how to heal the inner child.

Dr. Phelan strikes a home run with his 1-2-3 Magic program for disciplining children, by teaching parents how to use calm communication as opposed to that infused with frustration. The strength of his approach centers on getting toddlers to listen by using mild language and consistency, while refraining from exhibiting the strong emotions that often accompany attempts to reign in negative behavior. Phelan’s approach encourages parents to refrain from reactive communication, by replacing it with a much more effective method of redirecting little ones away from negative behavior. If you want to increase your toddler’s compliance, give 1-2-3 Magic a try. You may think counting doesn’t work, but done correctly, it can add up to amazing results!

The publisher of this workbook is Magination Press, which is associated with the American Psychological Association. As a psychologist myself, I can testify to the benefits of having an angry child go through the specific learning exercises contained in this workbook. Each chapter and exercise builds upon the previous ones so that kids can learn to manage angry feelings, hot-tempered communication, and negative responses to things they don’t like. Parents are encouraged to learn along with their child as they progress through understanding the body’s response to angry feelings, as well as how to appropriately respond to them. This is an easily understood workbook that many of my patients and parents have used with success.

For children, secrets can be a fun part of life. However, some secrets can be disturbing and even dangerous for a child to keep. Do You Have a Secret helps young children make the distinction between good secrets and bad secrets. Read together with a parent, a child can learn which secrets should not be kept inside, as well as how talking about them can actually help them feel better. This well-written book should be considered essential to a parent’s library of books that increase communication between parents and children. In today’s world, some secrets can be devasting to a child’s emotional health and well-being. Setting the stage for children to talk about them is one of the best things we can do in a world where there are simply too many secrets for children to cope with.

I frequently use this child’s book to help young children cope with the divorce of their parents. Too often, I’ve found, parents don’t know how to talk to their children about divorce, and even more often, children don’t know how to talk to their parents about their feelings and what they may see as the end of their family. I Don’t Want to Talk About It follows a young girl who just doesn’t want to talk about her fears and painful feelings when she discovers that her parents are divorcing. However, with the gentle help of her parents, she is ultimately able to gain the courage to talk to them about what the future holds. The children I’ve counseled about divorce have responded well to this soft and empathic book. I highly recommend it.

As a mother of three grown children, former teacher, and author, and speaker on parenting for many years, I much prefer the term “Spirited Child” to “Strong-Willed Child.” Do you have a child who’s more intense and persistent? Challenging and uncomfortable with change? Then thank your lucky stars. As they grow into their personality, these spirited kids can become the most empathetic and focused young people and successful adults. Learn how to work and parent with an understanding of your child’s temperament instead of trying to “break” your child’s will. Often when parents set out with punitive methods to break their child’s will, they end up breaking his or her spirit. This book has plenty of real-life stories, practical ideas, and the most current research.

Relationship experts who studied couples for years in the Love Lab in Seattle, the Gottmans understand that bringing a baby into the orbit of a couple nearly inevitably strains even the best relationship. They discovered that 2/3rds of couples experienced a significant decline in relationship satisfaction after having a baby. Their six-step plan helps expectant couples prepare for this huge transition by showing them ways to create an environment that nurtures intimacy, appreciation, and self- and couple-care. 

T. Berry Brazelton has been recognized as an expert on parenting and child development. I used to eagerly wait to read his newspaper column that offered concise advice on child care. In this book, Brazelton covers the milestones of typical development and he discusses common concerns of this age range. Although this book focuses on emotional and behavioral development, his background in pediatrics allows him to write about physical development as well. You will learn, in detail, what to expect of young children up to age three in this comprehensive book.

Jill Castle is a childhood nutritionist who also understands child development AND temperament. Her whole-child approach to healthy eating is refreshingly positive, respectful, supportive, and practical. Jill uses a step-by-step system to help even the most sensitive child enjoy a wide variety of foods. She clearly demonstrates how to stop the mealtime battles and instead make meals a time for connection and calm.