Here are 100 books that When I Say No, I Feel Guilty fans have personally recommended if you like
When I Say No, I Feel Guilty.
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I was driven to become a veterinarian for as long as I could remember. Then, in high school, I developed a love of performance. I felt stuck. Should I choose art or science? I chose science, and despite a great career, I felt like something was missing. When I reconnected with my creativity through stand-up comedy, entrepreneurship and other non-artistic creative outlets, I found out what I had been missing. Why do we drop creativity for science? It was a common story. I dove into the research on creativity, and was blown away by how a bit of creativity can make us happier, more resilient, and make workplaces more effective.
As I read this book, I felt like the author was looking into my soul. I loved the short, punchy observations and challenges to anyone seeking to share their creativity. The Resistance is a force universal to everyone who is trying to share a little piece of themselves, and I love the way that it is broken down in this book.
I realized that when I could see what was holding me back from expressing myself, I was able to find strategies to mitigate that fear. This book was instrumental in my ability to express myself as an author and speaker.
A succinct, engaging, and practical guide forsucceeding in any creative sphere, The War ofArt is nothing less than Sun-Tzu for the soul.
What keeps so many of us from doing what we long to do?
Why is there a naysayer within? How can we avoid theroadblocks of any creative endeavor—be it starting up a dreambusiness venture, writing a novel, or painting a masterpiece?
Bestselling novelist Steven Pressfield identifies the enemy thatevery one of us must face, outlines a battle plan to conquer thisinternal foe, then pinpoints just how to achieve the greatest success.
To paraphrase the old Hair Club for Men ads from 1980s late-night TV, I'm not only a life coach, I'm also a client. I’ve been a self-help junkie since before the term was a book category. I started out with Eastern thought, added in meditation and psychology, and eventually became a therapist and life coach myself. Like the authors of several of the books I’m recommending here, I’ve crystalized into one easy-to-access volume the essence of what I’ve learned from 20 years of working with clients and from my own struggles. I hope these books help you move ahead confidently, knowing you can take on whatever comes your way.
The Highly Sensitive Person is another book I wish had existed when I was growing up. It helped me understand that I’m someone who takes in, on both a sensory and emotional level, more than most people do—an HSP.
Often misdiagnosed as anxiety, being “highly sensitive” is a mixed blessing. We HSPs can’t screen much out, so we’re bothered by sounds, smells, and internal sensations that most people don’t even notice. But, because we have more data to work with, often we can make connections that non-HSPs cannot. HSPs are often highly creative.
The book includes a simple test to identify high sensitivity and practical advice for making the most of this trait in yourself or in your highly sensitive child.
The 25TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION of the original ground-breaking book on high sensitivity with over 500,000 copies sold.
ARE YOU A HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON?
Do you have a keen imagination and vivid dreams? Is time alone each day as essential to you as food and water? Are you noted for your empathy? Your conscientiousness? Do noise and confusion quickly overwhelm you? If your answers are yes, you may be a highly sensitive person (HSP) and Dr. Elaine Aron’s The Highly Sensitive Person is the life-changing guide you’ll want in your toolbox.
Over twenty percent of people have this amazing, innate trait.…
To paraphrase the old Hair Club for Men ads from 1980s late-night TV, I'm not only a life coach, I'm also a client. I’ve been a self-help junkie since before the term was a book category. I started out with Eastern thought, added in meditation and psychology, and eventually became a therapist and life coach myself. Like the authors of several of the books I’m recommending here, I’ve crystalized into one easy-to-access volume the essence of what I’ve learned from 20 years of working with clients and from my own struggles. I hope these books help you move ahead confidently, knowing you can take on whatever comes your way.
I read Being Peace about 30 years ago. It’s the first of many books by this Zen Buddhist monk that I’ve read since then.
In one short volume, it captures the essence of what he teaches in his writings, retreats, and videos. Each short segment has layers of meaning and emotion that, over time, settle into the soul.
Despite years of therapy and meditation, my periods of inner peace were few and far between. This book planted a seed that led to more books, a new meditation practice, and eventually to my going to a large retreat, joining a community of Buddhist practitioners, and becoming a therapist myself.
I’ve passed on many of Thich Nhat Hanh’s wise insights and observations to my own clients.
A bestseller with over 250,000 copies sold, Being Peace is the seminal founding work by Zen Master and Nobel Peace Prize nominee Thich Nhat Hanh. With a new introduction by Jack Kornfield and the first update since its release over fifteen years ago, this eloquent meditation on "being peace in order to make peace" is more relevant than ever. A book for everyone concerned about the state of the world and the quality of our lives, it has lost none of its timeliness since it was first published in 1987. It is filled with practical suggestions how to create a…
To paraphrase the old Hair Club for Men ads from 1980s late-night TV, I'm not only a life coach, I'm also a client. I’ve been a self-help junkie since before the term was a book category. I started out with Eastern thought, added in meditation and psychology, and eventually became a therapist and life coach myself. Like the authors of several of the books I’m recommending here, I’ve crystalized into one easy-to-access volume the essence of what I’ve learned from 20 years of working with clients and from my own struggles. I hope these books help you move ahead confidently, knowing you can take on whatever comes your way.
In the late 1960s, Eugene Gendlin teamed up with pioneer psychologist Carl Rogers to try to figure out why some people got better with therapy while others did not.
After screening for all the factors that might explain this phenomenon, they identified the most important one, and it was something people either came into therapy already doing (and they got better) or didn’t do (and they didn’t improve). Gendlin created Focusing to teach us all this simple, powerful technique. It’s the best self-help tool I know.
Along with meditation, Focusing is at the heart of my personal and professional life.
The classic guide to a powerful technique that can increase your mindfulness and lead to personal transformation
Based on groundbreaking research conducted at the University of Chicago, the focusing technique has gained widespread popularity and scholarly acclaim. It consists of six easy-to-master steps that identify and change the way thoughts and emotions are held within the body. Focusing can be done virtually anywhere, at any time, and an entire “session” can take no longer than ten minutes, but its effects can be felt immediately–in the relief of bodily tension and psychological stress, as well as in dramatic shifts in understanding…
I have a passion for helping people realize they are only limited by their imagination. By dreaming wildly and acting on one’s dreams, a person can achieve highly unlikely outcomes. People are born to be free and pursue the things in life that make them happy and fulfilled. However, people need education, training, and mentoring. I am driven to do each of these to help others live fulfilling and purposeful lives. My expertise arises from my formal training and applied life lessons acquired from modeling highly-gifted teachers and friends.
I read this book when I was a teenager and it set me on a path of assertiveness and self-determination.
He had memorable content, such as “A clerk is a jerk,” that helped me put life in a different perspective. After reading the book, I was empowered and free to do as I felt was right in the world. The book taught me not to put up with other people’s BS.
INSTANT NATIONAL BESTSELLER, WITH OVER 3 MILLION COPIES SOLD
From the #1 bestselling author of Your Erroneous Zones, a directed and practical book that shows you how to stop being manipulated by others and start taking charge of your own life.
Wayne Dyer reveals how we all can prevent ourselves from being victimized by others and begin to operate from a position of power at the center of our own lives. Asserting that we alone are responsible for how much we will be controlled by others, Dyer offers his practical plan for developing new attitudes toward the most common sources…
Growing up I never felt good enough. I was called ‘tubby’ and ‘little tubette.’ I tried to people-please my way to love and acceptance, being who I thought others wanted and needed me to be. I achieved. I followed (most of) the rules and was nice and polite. But none of that worked to cultivate a balanced or meaningful life. Not surprisingly, this led me to a career in psychology and a love of learning about how to help others with similar struggles. Reading and writing self-development books has completely changed my life for the better. I hope this list will help you do the same!
Raise your hand if you’re a people-pleaser who hates letting others down but often feels overstretched and resentful. Raise your other hand if you’re a curious sort who loves getting involved in all sorts of projects but the juggling act is becoming impossible to sustain. Yeah, me too.
In The Power of Saying No Vanessa Patrick enlightens us as to why we say yes when we want to say no and teaches us the skill of empowered refusal. With tools for making rules, not decisions, using values as a guide, and managing pushback, this book will cure you of being a ’yes person’ and put you back in charge of how you are choosing to spend your precious time.
Stop saying yes. Start saying no. Change your life!
You have probably said "yes" to bosses, partners, family, friends, and even strangers, when you actually want to say "no." Maybe you wish you could say no more often, but you're not sure how or if it's even possible to do so. You're not alone! We're taught to say yes as often as we can. After all, if you say no, aren't you likely to miss out on opportunities and sever important relationships? Isn't saying no a harmony-buster?
In The Power of Saying No, award-winning professor and researcher Vanessa Patrick delves…
I spent 20 years leading global teams in Silicon Valley, and I had few role models for empathetic, human, and inclusive leadership. I was committed to being the leader I wished I’d had all those years. I had a lot of success, a big VP-level job, and I loved my work. Then, I got a new manager who bullied, undermined, and silenced me. I decided I wanted to help leaders do better. I became an author, speaker, and consultant focused on inspiring leaders to create an environment where everyone is heard, seen, and respected.
As someone who has been silenced at various times in my career, I was immediately drawn to this book. I expected it to be about how to find our voices, but it was so much deeper and more nuanced than that. I loved how Elaine talked about how there are times when silence serves us well, and I especially appreciated her exploration of how we silence others, often unconsciously.
I appreciated the way Elaine shared her own journey of unlearning silence, as well as many stories and case studies throughout the book—it stayed out of the theoretical and felt grounded in real life. I also loved the optimistic and inspiring invitation in the conclusion. Count me in!
My journey into art began as a serendipitous discovery that unfolded through curiosity. As a “can’t-be-tamed” creative, I understand the tug-of-war artists feel – craving to learn skills and create “quality” pieces, while also thumbing the snooze-fest of sticking to one thing. Been there, done that, got the paint-splattered t-shirt. This has ignited a passion for encouraging others to find their own creative voice, as I've navigated the same path while building a multifaceted career in watercolor, gouache, line drawing, urban sketching, brush lettering, and calligraphy…need I go on? The thing is, I will because there is still so much to be explored.
Engaging with this book, I recognized how fear of imperfection often held me back, not just in my art but in various aspects of life. I feel like the importance of showing up and being seen, even when there are no guarantees, is a reminder that I can continue to revisit time and time again.
This book has empowered me to approach my art practice with a heart open to risks and imperfections, which transforms not just the art I produce, but also how I lead, love, and connect with the world around me.
'She's so good, Brene Brown, at finding the language to articulate collective feeling' Dolly Alderton
Every time we are faced with change, no matter how great or small, we also face risk. We feel uncertain and exposed. We feel vulnerable. Most of us try to fight those feelings - or feel guilt for feeling them in the first place.
In a powerful new vision Dr Brene Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability, and dispels the widely accepted myth that it's a weakness. She argues that, in truth, vulnerability is…
I am an author and illustrator of children's picturebooks, having completed my MA at the Cambridge School of Art. I am endlessly fascinated with the picture book as a rich medium for children to safely and slowly approach topics that might be challenging for them. Picture books can be such a versatile, interesting place for curiosity and confidence to thrive, while also creating a lovely time for closeness between parent/carer and child. As we grapple with the long-term effects of the pandemic, I feel that children will need stories more than ever, to help them make sense of their experiences.
This subtle and tender book is a moving look at life continuing in small moments after a bereavement. I love the marriage of words and images, where each part tells a different piece of the story and the relationship between the boy and his father. The boy asks questions, about the birds, the trees, the fox, and his mother, looking for reassurance. When the father repeats "everything is going to be alright," we are all reassured and comforted, and held safe in arms like a boat.
It's quieter than it's ever been. Unable to sleep, a young boy climbs into his father's arms. Feeling the warmth and closeness of his father, he begins to ask questions about the birds, the foxes, and whether his mom will ever wake up. They go outside under the starry sky. Loss and love are as present as the white spruces, while the father's clear answers and assurances calm his worried son. Here we feel the cycles of life and life's continuity, even in the face of absence and loss, so strongly and clearly that we know at the end that…
Resilience - helping people recover their capacities to deal with any adversity, stress, loss or trauma – is the heart of my work as a licensed psychotherapist (25 years) and an international trainer of mental health professionals (more than a decade). Bouncing Back is the book I wanted to be able to hand my clients to help them learn to use the capacities of resilience innate in their brains to develop more effective patterns of response to life crises and catastrophes. No such book was available at the time, so I wrote my own. It has become a tremendous resource for people to learn to how to be more resilient, and to learn that they can learn.
The touching story of navigating the loss of a child that illuminates the strategies most helpful in navigating overwhelming grief, and steadily, reliably, recovering new joy and new meaning in life going forward.
The death of someone we hold dear may be inevitable; being paralysed by our grief is not. A growing body of research has revealed our capacity for resilient grieving, our innate ability to respond to traumatic loss by finding ways to grow - by becoming more engaged with our lives, and discovering new, profound meaning.
Author and resilience/well-being expert Lucy Hone, a pioneer in fusing positive psychology and bereavement research, was faced with her own inescapable sorrow when, in 2014, her 12-year-old daughter was killed in a car accident. By following the strategies of resilient grieving, she found a proactive…
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