The most recommended books on self-compassion

Who picked these books? Meet our 15 experts.

15 authors created a book list connected to self-compassion, and here are their favorite self-compassion books.
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Book cover of The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive

Dr. Kate Truitt Author Of Healing In Your Hands: Self-Havening Practices to Harness Neuroplasticity, Heal Traumatic Stress, and Build Resilience

From my list on healing trauma and building resilience.

Why am I passionate about this?

As a clinical psychologist and neuroscientist, I have dedicated my life to understanding and healing the wounds of trauma and stress. My passion comes from witnessing the power of blending neuroscience with therapy in my personal and professional life. The resilience and healing I see daily inspire me. My work empowers individuals to reclaim their mental health and build resilient minds. This curated book list reflects my commitment to accessible, actionable tools for self-healing and growth. I believe mental health is a human right, though access to therapy is a privilege. These authors offer empowering, insightful works to put healing into everyone’s hands.

Dr.'s book list on healing trauma and building resilience

Dr. Kate Truitt Why did Dr. love this book?

My last pick is a transformative resource for developing self-kindness and emotional resilience. I love this workbook because it has practical exercises and guided practices that foster self-compassion. Neff and Germer’s approach, which combines mindfulness with self-compassion, offers a powerful framework for personal growth.

Their warm and empathetic writing makes the journey towards self-compassion manageable and rewarding. This workbook has been a treasure trove of tools for building inner strength and finding peace within. I highly recommend it to anyone looking to cultivate a more compassionate relationship with themselves.

By Kristin Neff, Christopher Germer,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Are you kinder to others than you are to yourself? More than a thousand research studies show the benefits of being a supportive friend to yourself, especially in times of need. This science-based workbook offers a step-by-step approach to breaking free of harsh self-judgments and impossible standards in order to cultivate emotional well-being. In a convenient large-size format, the book is based on the authors' groundbreaking eight-week Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) program, which has helped tens of thousands of people worldwide. It is packed with guided meditations (with audio downloads); informal practices to do anytime, anywhere; exercises; and vivid stories of…


Book cover of You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent: How to Practice Self-Compassion and Give Yourself a Break

Jessica L. Borelli Author Of Nature Meets Nurture: Science-Based Strategies for Raising Resilient Kids

From my list on people who want to connect with their child.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve been fascinated by relationships since I was a kid. I grew up a keen observer of the relationships in my own family, mostly focused on the way in which the dynamics were difficult for me. This led me to develop a strong interest in psychology, a passion I pursued in my undergraduate education. I became acutely intrigued by an idea a professor exposed me to early on – that experiences of safety and security within attachment relationships are essential in order for children to thrive, and that without safety/security, they can experience chronic struggles. This early interest paved the way for what developed into my career as a psychology professor and therapist.

Jessica's book list on people who want to connect with their child

Jessica L. Borelli Why did Jessica love this book?

Dr. Naumburg’s books, including this one, offer a fresh perspective on parenting.

In this book, she compels parents to practice radical self-compassion. I find her message comforting and welcome, especially in an era when parents get messages from literally everywhere about all of the things they need to do better. Ironically, our feelings of guilt and anxiety about parenting can actually get in the way of good parenting, so finding a way to tune out these voices is important.

Dr. Naumburg is here to tell parents to accept that we are human, that parenting standards are impossibly hard, and that we should be more understanding of ourselves. This just feels really good to hear, especially on the heels of the pandemic, and I think we all need this message.

This is the kind of book I frequently recommend to friends and clients. 

By Carla Naumburg,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Life is chaotic, parenting is hard and many of us know that what we're currently doing just isn't working for anyone. Most of the time we just end up feeling like we're doing a sh*t job.

But it doesn't have to be that way. Social worker, parent coach and mum Carla Naumburg presents her own experience of self-compassion to show how this simple evidence-based practice can transform the way you parent. From navigating difficult emotions and dealing with everyday stresses, You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent shows how a bit of self-compassion can lead to a more engaged style of…


Book cover of Journey to the Heart: Daily Meditations on the Path to Freeing Your Soul

Rebecca E. Williams Author Of The Mindfulness Workbook for Addiction: A Guide to Coping with the Grief, Stress, and Anger That Trigger Addictive Behaviors, 2nd Edition

From my list on ridiculously simple self-care in addiction recovery.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a psychologist, an award-winning author, and a yoga and meditation devotee. Growing up in the Bronx, New York I saw firsthand the devastating impact addiction can have on individuals and families. That is why I have dedicated my professional life to understanding and supporting people recovering from addiction, mental illness, and life's challenges. I’m also the co-author of The Gift of Recovery: 52 Mindful Ways to Live Joyfully Beyond Addiction, which offers lots of strategies to manage daily stressors. I wholeheartedly believe there is a path back to wellness. It takes a foundation of self-compassion and daily focus on your healing. You deserve to be healthy and happy.

Rebecca's book list on ridiculously simple self-care in addiction recovery

Rebecca E. Williams Why did Rebecca love this book?

I stumbled upon a terrific life companion in Melody Beattie’s Journey to the Heart book. I read a few gentle meditations every evening before bed, and feel both inspired and relaxed. There is definitely a way back to self-compassion and mental well-being and Melody has cleared the rocky path for us. All we have to do is walk it with her. If you have just one book by your bedside as you heal from addiction, this should be the one.

By Melody Beattie,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Journey to the Heart as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In the spirit of her bestselling "The Language of Letting Go", America's most beloved inspirational writer guides us on a sacred journey as we learn to expand our creativity, embrace our powers, and open our hearts. Writing with the same warmth, honesty, and compassion that has attracted such a loyal following, Melody Beattie now charts a new path toward spiritual growth and renewal. In 365 insightful and delightfully warm daily reflections, "Journey to the Heart" will comfort and inspire us all as we begin to discover our true purpose in the world and learn to connect even more deeply with…


Book cover of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions

Cory Reese Author Of Stronger Than the Dark: Exploring the Intimate Relationship Between Running and Depression

From my list on decreasing the mind funk of depression.

Why am I passionate about this?

In the past, I had written a few books about running ultramarathons. After being diagnosed with a chronic health condition, the sport I felt so much passion about began to slip away. I noticed myself falling into depression. Even though I’ve worked as a social worker for nearly 20 years, there was so much about depression that I didn’t completely understand until I experienced it myself. My path toward healing became the storyline for my book Stronger Than the Dark, and increased my desire to advocate for the importance of mental health.

Cory's book list on decreasing the mind funk of depression

Cory Reese Why did Cory love this book?

I happened to listen to The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion around the time that I first started seeing a therapist. So much of the coaching from my therapist was mirrored by the messages in Germer’s book. He provides specific tools we can use to increase self-love, including an emphasis on the value of meditation. 

By Christopher Germer,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"Buck up." "Stop feeling sorry for yourself." "Don't ruin everything." When you are anxious, sad, angry, or lonely, do you hear this self-critical voice? What would happen if, instead of fighting difficult emotions, we accepted them? Over his decades of experience as a therapist and mindfulness meditation practitioner, Dr. Christopher Germer has learned a paradoxical lesson: We all want to avoid pain, but letting it in--and responding compassionately to our own imperfections, without judgment or self-blame--are essential steps on the path to healing. This wise and eloquent book illuminates the power of self-compassion and offers creative, scientifically grounded strategies for…


Book cover of What Do You Do With an Idea?

Tina Koopersmith Author Of What Am I?

From my list on young children to build self compassion.

Why am I passionate about this?

Children feel all their emotions, but I learned to suppress many emotions to avoid criticism. The youngest, I learned to not trust my intuition. I was taught that the mind was the path to success. In my chosen medical profession, physicians use intellect to heal bodies. The interconnection of thoughts, emotions, energy as well as interconnections between people and the environment are ignored. This separation from all of me was sapping me of the joy of living a full life. During my self healing integration journey: I uncovered limiting beliefs, reconnected with my heart, and dove deep into the source of my pleasure. Bringing this awareness to light should be healing.

Tina's book list on young children to build self compassion

Tina Koopersmith Why did Tina love this book?

This book encourages young children to believe in their thoughts, their ideas, their inner knowing.

This book encourages creativity, self-compassion, motivation, and action. It encourages young children to persevere and not give up hope, even if others cannot appreciate their ideas and their goals. It reminds children that a “NO” is not a failure, but just an opportunity to pivot or change tactics.

By Kobi Yamada, Mae Besom (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked What Do You Do With an Idea? as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 4, 5, 6, and 7.

What is this book about?

A New York Times Best Seller and award-winning book, What Do You Do With an Idea? is for anyone who's ever had a big idea. This is the story of one brilliant idea and the child who helps to bring it into the world. As the child's confidence grows, so does the idea itself. And then, one day, something amazing happens. This is a story for anyone, at any age, who's ever had an idea that seemed a little too big, too odd, too difficult. It's a story to inspire you to welcome that idea, to give it some space…


Book cover of Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself

Lauren Cook Author Of Generation Anxiety: A Millennial and Gen Z Guide to Staying Afloat in an Uncertain World

From my list on how to cope and live with anxiety.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve lived with anxiety for most of my life. Whether it’s been with emetophobia (a phobia of vomit) or an intense bout of panic attacks, I know the story well. Now, as a psychologist, I’ve seen up close what works and what doesn’t. I love helping my clients and the audiences that I work with learn how to accept their anxiety, rather than try to make it go away. This is often counterintuitive at first but we can still live an empowered life, even with the anxiety present. When we do this, we’ve unlocked a whole new level of liberation where we can show up fully, worries and all. 

Lauren's book list on how to cope and live with anxiety

Lauren Cook Why did Lauren love this book?

This book is a staple in the field of psychology and mental health and for very good reason.

So many of us struggle with being kind to our mind and we worry that we’ll truly fall apart if we are compassionate to ourselves. Dr. Neff brings the evidence-backed research to prove that self-compassion is the antidote to anxiety and it has incredibly restorative potential to help us not only get back to baseline, but truly feel better.

By Kristin Neff,

Why should I read it?

6 authors picked Self-Compassion as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

THE 10TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION WITH A NEW FOREWORD FROM KRISTIN NEFF

'Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation.' Tara Brach, PhD, author of Radical Acceptance

Kristin Neff PhD, is a professor in educational psychology, and the world's expert on self-compassion. A pioneer who established self-compassion as a field of study, Kristin offers a powerful solution for combating negativity and insecurity - the symptoms of living in a high-pressure world.

Through tried and tested exercises and audio downloads, readers learn the 3 core components that will help to heal destructive emotional patterns…


Book cover of The Empathy Effect: Seven Neuroscience-Based Keys for Transforming the Way We Live, Love, Work, and Connect Across Differences

Richard E. Boyatzis Author Of Helping People Change: Coaching with Compassion for Lifelong Learning and Growth

From my list on building leadership skills through models.

Why am I passionate about this?

As a professor and scientist, using my Intentional Change Theory (ICT), I have studied sustained desired change of individuals, teams, organizations, communities, and countries since 1967. I have authored more than 200 articles and 9 books on leadership, competencies, emotional intelligence, competency development, coaching, neuroscience, and management education (including the international best-seller, Primal Leadership with Daniel Goleman and Annie McKee and the recent Helping People Change with Melvin Smith and Ellen Van Oosten). I run several Coursera MOOCs, including Inspiring Leadership Through Emotional Intelligence which has over a million enrolled from 215 countries.

Richard's book list on building leadership skills through models

Richard E. Boyatzis Why did Richard love this book?

Of all of the competencies that repeatedly predict effective leadership and creating and maintaining of key relationships, is empathy. At the heart of any relationship and perhaps the only antidote to rampant narcissism in our society is empathy. As a prominent psychiatrist and scholar, Helen chronicles decades of research and explains the neural mechanisms that enable us to relate to others, build better relationships ad even inspire others. Her personal stories and those of patients and colleagues make the research come alive with compassion and meaning.

By Helen Riess, Liz Neporent,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Empathy Effect as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"We are all connected on a neurobiological level far more than we have previously realized. Consciously or not, we are in constant, natural resonance with one another's feelings. When we are engaged in shared mind awareness, the possibilities for mutual aid and collaborative problem solving abound."
-Helen Riess, MD

A Revolutionary Guide for Understanding and Changing the Way We Connect

Empathy is undergoing a new evolution. In a global and interconnected culture, we can no longer afford to identify only with people who seem to be a part of our "tribe." As Dr. Helen Riess has learned, our capacity for…


Book cover of How to Be Nice to Yourself: The Everyday Guide to Self-Compassion

Jennifer Kemp Author Of The Neurodivergence Skills Workbook for Autism and ADHD: Cultivate Self-Compassion, Live Authentically, and Be Your Own Advocate

From my list on being proud of your neurodivergent identity.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a clinical psychologist who was surprised to realize that I am both Autistic and an ADHDer in my late 40s. I have always been fascinated by psychology, and now Autism and ADHD have become my areas of “special interest” (“spin”). I have been reading widely to learn more about myself, find practical ways to alleviate the chronic sense of overwhelm I experience and recover from burnout. Most of my clients are also late-diagnosed neurodivergent adults who have complex mental and physical health problems, so the reading I’ve been doing has given me fresh insights to share and helpful strategies we can test out together. 

Jennifer's book list on being proud of your neurodivergent identity

Jennifer Kemp Why did Jennifer love this book?

This beautiful book makes offering yourself compassion simple and achievable. I have been recommending this book for a long time because I love how Laura captures all the key skills of self-compassion and explains them in a way that is practical and easy to follow.

So many books about self-compassion are very long, theoretical, and unnecessarily complex, and I find them hard to read. This book is grounded in what researchers have shown can help (it’s evidence-based), but it doesn’t get bogged down in theory.

Instead, Laura’s simple worksheets, written exercises, mindfulness, and visualization scripts gave me new skills to tackle self-criticism and put self-compassion into action. I have even used exercises in the book with my clients and they’ve loved them too.

By Laura Silberstein-Tirch,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked How to Be Nice to Yourself as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Practice deep self compassion with a wide range of strategies.

Today's the day to start loving yourself. How to Be Nice to Yourself makes it simple to start practicing self compassion with a wide variety of techniques and strategies that anyone can learn.

Filled with easy-to-use advice drawn from a variety of sources―including meditation, mindfulness, and acceptance and commitment therapy―this book will help you find the right way to start feeling good about yourself.

How to Be Nice to Yourself: The Everyday Guide to Self Compassion includes:

Proven Strategies―Learn a variety of ways to practice self compassion daily―with meditations, writing…


Book cover of A Manual for Being Human

Kate Moyle Author Of The Science of Sex: Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered

From my list on thinking about sex and relationships differently.

Why am I passionate about this?

I have always been fascinated by what makes people tick. Why people do what they do, how people can experience the same thing so differently, and why certain words like sex can create a shift in how people behave. As a Psychosexual and Relationship Therapist it’s what I’m working on with people every day – and every day is different. My work outside the therapy room, hosting my podcast The Sexual Wellness Sessions and writing my book The Science Of Sex feels ironic in ways – I’m trying to normalise the conversations and break down the taboo so that less people end up in the therapy room feeling like they are the only one struggling.

Kate's book list on thinking about sex and relationships differently

Kate Moyle Why did Kate love this book?

As the title suggests, this book is a manual for the human experience.

Dr. Soph breaks her knowledge and experience out of the therapy room and tackles the themes of how you got here, what’s keeping you here, and how you can move forward. This book just makes so much sense, and gives you the tools to understand and help yourself, and explains concepts like how our brains use shortcuts to make sense of the world; and how this can then show up and influence us.

What I love about this book is that it helps you to question, and to think about what works for you, what doesn’t, and what you want to do about it. 

By Sophie Mort,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked A Manual for Being Human as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?


THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER

'Clear, accessible wise advice for modern minds.' Matt Haig

'A Manual for Being Human is the motherlode, enlightening on why you might feel and behave how you do.' The Times

'A truly wonderful, warm and wise one-stop shop for any inquisitive human. Packed full of prompts, practical tips and pep talks that will guide you through any situation.' Emma Gannon

'There is a damn good reason why people are struggling. We are not raised to understand ourselves. In fact, we are raised misunderstanding ourselves and fearing the very thing that makes us, us.' Dr Soph

Do…


Book cover of The Courage to Be Me: A Story of Courage, Self-Compassion and Hope After Sexual Abuse

Meg-John Barker Author Of Sexuality: A Graphic Guide

From my list on comic books about sexuality.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a queer writer who is passionate about getting good awareness of gender, sexuality, relationships and mental health out there into the world. I create comics, zines, blog posts, and self-help style books to try to reach as wide an audience as possible, bringing together the work of activists, scholars, therapists, and creators - and drawing on a diverse range of knowledge and experiences - in the hope of helping us all understand ourselves and our world better.

Meg-John's book list on comic books about sexuality

Meg-John Barker Why did Meg-John love this book?

Post #metoo there’s a lot more awareness around sexual abuse and assault, but still few books to help readers to understand why it impacts them the way it does. 

In The Courage to Be Me, cartooning psychologist Nina Burrowes presents what we know from the science of sexual trauma, and tells the stories of a group who support each other around their experiences. 

Having several different stories, all illustrated by different comic artists, emphasises the diverse forms that assault and abuse can take, and the ways in which they hit us all differently. Despite the tough topics covered, this is an uplifting book which helps the reader to see their experiences reflected, and to learn some skills for how to look after themselves around what happened with the kindness they deserve.


By Nina Burrowes, Alexander Bertram-Powell (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Courage to Be Me as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

How do you rebuild your life after sexual abuse? Join a group of women as they share their stories of courage, self-compassion and hope. Find out how meeting each other and learning about recovery helped them find the courage to be themselves. The courage to be me combines science, storytelling and illustration to send a message of hope to the millions of people who are living with the impact of rape or sexual abuse. Written by psychologist and researcher Dr Nina Burrowes