Self-Compassion

This book is a staple in the field of psychology and mental health and for very good reason.

So many of us struggle with being kind to our mind and we worry that we’ll truly fall apart if we are compassionate to ourselves. Dr. Neff brings the evidence-backed research to prove that self-compassion is the antidote to anxiety and it has incredibly restorative potential to help us not only get back to baseline, but truly feel better.

If you thought my list would be all yoga-based texts, you thought wrong. This book is a book I have turned to again and again to find my way out of a rut—a yoga teaching rut or a life rut. At the heart of her message, Neff reminds readers that they are the people most able to offer care, compassion, support, and love to themselves. This book is empowering, eye-opening, and a call to action on self-ahimsa. It’s a book that builds up your sense of self in a real, tangible way (not a self-helpy, talk show kind of way.)… show more.

This is not, strictly speaking, a book about personal finance. But for women who beat themselves up emotionally about the state of their finances, Self-Compassion is truly powerful. Blending exercises, research insights, and well-told stories, Neff helps readers notice and transform how they treat themselves when it comes to touchy subjects like money. Finances can be an emotional minefield, but Neff’s self-compassion practices can help anyone approach the topic from a place of greater calm—thereby increasing their chance of achieving positive change. I use Neff’s teachings in my daily life and my work, and I have recommended this book to… show more.

What I love about this book is unlike other books that tell us to build higher self-esteem or confidence, this book suggests opting out of the self-esteem game altogether. It gets us thinking if worthiness is truly what we want in life.

Rather than constantly evaluating our self-worth and comparing ourselves with others, this book encourages us to be kinder toward ourselves and others, and have compassion for our critical thoughts. 

I also like how the author uses personal stories and practical exercises to help us overcome our self-criticism habits and break free from our destructive patterns of negativity.

People are limited in life by the internal dialogue they have in their head and most people have an inner critical voice that leaves them feeling never good enough. I recommend Self-Compassion by Neff to all of my psychotherapy clients at the beginning of therapy because developing a kinder inner voice that encourages them through the difficult times is essential for mental well-being and lays the perfect foundation for moving forward in therapy.

Why should you read Kristin Neff on self-compassion? Well, first, as a psychologist she invented self-compassion as an area of scientific study. She’s a true pioneer. But she’s not just an academic; she’s been practicing meditation for decades. Her book will lead you step-by-step through the how and why of self-compassion and explains how compassion for oneself extends naturally into having compassion for others.