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I am a child of a high-conflict divorce, so when I became a clinical psychologist my mission was to prevent the kind of suffering that is common in divorce, especially for children. I have worked with thousands of children and families going through divorces, some amicably and some with extreme difficulty. Divorce can be damaging but there are ways to prevent that damage, and these books including mine, as well as my blog are all tools with the same goal: help families avoid the pain, upheaval, loss, and destruction of a litigated divorce. In my work now I focus on working with people who commit to work through their divorce without threats of litigation. I work primarily in the area of Collaborative Divorce.
Bill Eddy is the expert on reducing conflict in high-conflict divorce (all of his books are well worth reading). Conflict in divorce can be traumatic, and especially hurts the children. Bill has useful acronyms and tools to help manage the intensity of communication between divorcing parents. His style is conversational and informal, but his content is rich. I like the way he illustrates his points with stories of people he’s worked with. I recommend BIFF and other tools to my patients going through divorce.
"Coparenting is hard in any circumstance and when doing it with someone that has a high conflict personality, can seem impossible. The first step is to admit that you are outmatched in every way except for the ability to learn new skills related to the high conflict personality. My life did not change until I began to read and understand and start using tools like BIFF. I couldn’t help my children because I couldn’t help myself and until I learned new tools, felt hopeless. Using BIFF will give you hope that change is possible.” A.C., parent
I am a child of a high-conflict divorce, so when I became a clinical psychologist my mission was to prevent the kind of suffering that is common in divorce, especially for children. I have worked with thousands of children and families going through divorces, some amicably and some with extreme difficulty. Divorce can be damaging but there are ways to prevent that damage, and these books including mine, as well as my blog are all tools with the same goal: help families avoid the pain, upheaval, loss, and destruction of a litigated divorce. In my work now I focus on working with people who commit to work through their divorce without threats of litigation. I work primarily in the area of Collaborative Divorce.
With the rise in so-called “gray divorces,” adult children of divorce find that they are just as wounded, betrayed, devastated and grief-stricken as young children. The myth that it is better to “wait to divorce till after the kids are grown” turns out to be just that, a myth. Adult children of divorce have been neglected in divorce books until recently, and this book is a resource geared toward their unique circumstances, helping them process and adjust to their parent's divorce. Divorcing parents would also benefit from reading it if they have adult children.
Adult children are often overlooked and forgotten when their parents divorce later in life, but in these pages they will find comfort and understanding for the many feelings, frustrations, and challenges they face.
For more than two decades, a silent revolution has been occurring and creating a seismic shift in the American family and families in other countries. It has been unfolding without much comment, and its effects are being felt across three to four generations: more couples are divorcing later in life. Called the “gray divorce revolution,” the cultural phenomenon describes couples who divorce after the age of 50.…
I am a child of a high-conflict divorce, so when I became a clinical psychologist my mission was to prevent the kind of suffering that is common in divorce, especially for children. I have worked with thousands of children and families going through divorces, some amicably and some with extreme difficulty. Divorce can be damaging but there are ways to prevent that damage, and these books including mine, as well as my blog are all tools with the same goal: help families avoid the pain, upheaval, loss, and destruction of a litigated divorce. In my work now I focus on working with people who commit to work through their divorce without threats of litigation. I work primarily in the area of Collaborative Divorce.
Collaborative Divorce is not new, it has been around since the mid-1990s. It is an alternative to litigation when mediation is not going to be enough support. The core of the approach is respect, honesty, transparency, and concern for the entire family. Mediation and Collaborative Divorce are both confidential processes that avoid litigation but there are significant advantages to Collaborative Divorce. Mediation is with one neutral facilitator (mediator) but in a Collaborative Divorce, each person has their own specially trained attorney to guide them through the divorce. In addition, each person has their own divorce coach (sometimes just one neutral coach), and often a child specialist brings the voice of the children to the negotiations. This book describes how Collaborative Divorce works and will help readers decided whether this would be a good process choice for them. The goal is to help families avoid court and avoid ongoing conflict. The…
About half of all marriages in the United States end in divorce, and most of these divorces result in unnecessary collateral damage. Now there is a better way.
In Collaborative Divorce, Pauline Tesler and Peggy Thompson, two pioneers in the field who train collaborative professionals around the world, present the first complete, step-by-step explanation of the groundbreaking method that is revolutionizing the way couples end their marriages. Working with a team of caring specialists that includes two lawyers, two coaches, a financial consultant, and a child specialist (if necessary), you and your spouse focus on building a consensus that addresses…
I’ve known since I was 5 years old that my passion in life was helping people be all they came to this planet to be. I have been working with individuals, couples, businesses, and groups, and teaching courses for 54 years. Having had many years of my own psychotherapy, and 17 years into practicing traditional psychotherapy, I was not happy with the results, so I prayed for a teacher or a process that would really work. 38 years ago, I met Dr. Erika Chopich and we co-created the powerful Inner Bonding process, brought to us by our higher guidance, that rapidly heals on a very deep level, far beyond traditional psychotherapy.
My friend Katherine is a master at helping couples uncouple in kind and caring ways, filled with integrity. I recommend this book to all my clients who are ending their relationships, and many of my clients tell me how very helpful this book was to them. Breakups and divorces don’t have to be contentious, and even if just one of you reads this book, it will be incredibly helpful to you.
In 2014 a media storm erupted when Gwyneth Paltrow announced her separation from Chris Martin, describing it as a harmonious and mutual 'conscious uncoupling', and the term entered the world's vocabulary overnight.
Coined and created by relationship expert Katherine Woodward Thomas, Conscious Uncoupling is a paradigm-shifting guide for anyone suffering from heartache, whether you are in the midst of a breakup right now, still struggling with unresolved pain from a past breakup, or anticipating a possible breakup and wish to ensure it goes well.
Conscious Uncoupling’s transformational five step process provides an alternative path to the end of a relationship--one…
When I worked as a middle school teacher, I surveyed more than 200 students how they felt about books that included sadness and grief. The overwhelming answer from the students was that while adults too often minimize their feelings and dismiss the validity of their heartache, books do not. Many young readers want books that are honest and raw enough not to shield them from the world, but to pay enough attention to its pain to light a path, knowing that they can keep moving forward in the dark when they feel less alone and less afraid.
I adored every single character in this book. Dan Gemeinhart is a master at pulling readers in by creating characters you want to spend time with and miss when you turn to its final page.
The Remarkable Journey of Coyote Sunrise is a joyful journey of grief. Coyote and her dad have been traveling the American countryside in a refurbished school bus far from the tragedy of a car accident that killed Coyote's mother and two sisters. Expect to learn about resilience, bravery, and the necessity of facing hard emotions we’d rather outrun.
Five years. That's how long twelve-year-old Coyote and her dad, River, have lived on the road in an old school bus, criss-crossing the nation. It's also how long ago Coyote lost her mom and two sisters.
Coyote hasn't been home since, but when she learns that the park in her old neighbourhood is being demolished - the very same park where she, her mum, and her sisters buried a memory box - she devises a plan to get her dad to drive 3,600 miles back to Washington state.
On the way, they'll pick up an eclectic group of folks. Lester…
I’ve always been passionate about horses – in fact, I’ve adopted five wild mustangs over the years and ride often – so it’s no surprise that they often find their way into my stories. But birds and feathers tend to be important elements of my books, too. I live on a working family farm surrounded by hawks, bald eagles, blue herons, swans, owls, and countless others… but I suspect the true reason there are birds in my books has to do with the little sparrows who like to perch on my windowsill as I write!
There are rules for living in the magical town of Aldermere, including the fact that the ravens must be fed. For Fin, it’s the first place she’s ever felt safe – especially since she can spend a memory for a cup of tea that will help her forget memories that feed her anxieties. But when a visit to the tea shop goes horribly wrong, Fin must confront the source of her fear before something sinister destroys the entire town. This is a heartwarming story about finding courage, facing your past, and trusting your friends. It’s a lovely, thoughtful, charming book steeped in unexpected magic (like doors that don’t always lead where you expect!) and deep truth. I think this could be a great book for families to read together because it offers the sort of comfort that readers of any age can appreciate.
The trick to all magic is: you can only see it if you know where to look.
The magic-infused town of Aldermere is the first place eleven-year-old Fin has ever felt safe-and she'll do whatever it takes to save her home when she accidentally unleashes a shadow self who wreaks havoc everywhere she goes. Emily Lloyd-Jones's middle grade debut is an enchanting exploration of self-discovery and finding the place you truly belong. Unseen Magic is for fans of A Wish in the Dark and A Tangle of Knots.
Aldermere is a town with its own set of rules: there's a…
In my high school creative writing class, my teacher once said that good writing was a bit like looking at a star. If you look directly at it, it gets a little fuzzy and hard to see. But if you look just off to the side, the star becomes vivid and clear. That, to me, is exactly the power of spooky stories for young readers. We all deal with monsters, to varying degrees, throughout our lives. Even kids. But if we look at it just off to the side, through the angle of a fun, spooky story, those monsters suddenly become much more comprehensible. More faceable. More beatable.
It’s been said by smarter people than me how writing horror for kids isn’t about scaring them, it’s about showing them how brave they are.
A Monster Calls is the perfect illustration of that. The scariness and the spookiness are a stand-in for the real-life horrors that this kid is facing. Kids deal with a lot, and this book is the perfect example of how to survive when the worst happens.
The artwork too—wow! I wish I could get some of this artwork to hang on my walls. Absolutely gorgeous book.
The bestselling novel and major film about love, loss and hope from the twice Carnegie Medal-winning Patrick Ness.
Conor has the same dream every night, ever since his mother first fell ill, ever since she started the treatments that don't quite seem to be working. But tonight is different. Tonight, when he wakes, there's a visitor at his window. It's ancient, elemental, a force of nature. And it wants the most dangerous thing of all from Conor. It wants the truth. Patrick Ness takes the final idea of the late, award-winning writer Siobhan Dowd and weaves an extraordinary and heartbreaking…
I was a smart kid myself – I even have the report cards to prove it—and I always loved reading about other smart kids. As I got older, I realized that good grades and study habits are only part of the picture, because it’s emotional intelligence that helps us navigate the complicated parts of growing up. That’s why I wrote a book about a brilliant kid who learns to be part of a super-family, and that’s also why I love middle grade novels about clever kids who have to grow something other than their “book smarts” to figure out what they need to thrive. The books I’m recommending all get an A+ in that category.
Who doesn’t love a good pre-teen mystery, and this one is different because the “crime” is totally current. Drew Leclair is a clever girl who adores true crime content with her dad, especially after her mother runs off with Drew’s school guidance counselor. Ouch! But when the school’s anonymous cyber-bully starts targeting her and other kids at school with cruel posts revealing their secrets, Drew leans on her deductive reasoning to expose the perpetrator. Along the way, she’s dealing with friend drama and eventually comes to see that sometimes, her brainy ways are really just a way of avoiding some tough emotions. Does Drew catch the bully? Does she make new friends, or lose the only friend she has? You gotta read to find out.
In this modern take on Harriet the Spy, twelve-year-old Drew uses her true crime expertise to catch the cyberbully in her school—only to discover that family, friendship, and identity are the hardest mysteries to solve.
Drew Leclair knows what it takes to be a great detective. She’s pored over the cases solved by her hero, criminal profiler Lita Miyamoto. She tracked down the graffiti artist at school, and even solved the mystery of her neighbor’s missing rabbit. But when her mother runs off to Hawaii with the school guidance counselor, Drew is shocked. How did she miss all of the…
I’m a middle grade author, and I believe so much in the power of books to help broker conversations between kids and the adults in their lives, especially if those conversations are about things that are often tricky and tough to talk about. I love how middle grade fiction will fearlessly tackle these difficult topics, but does so well with heart and humor.
This is one of my favorite middle grade books ever! Caterpillar Summer is about Cat who finds herself spending the summer with her estranged grandparents at their beach house. The setting in this book is so vividly rendered—it made me immediately want to take a trip to a Carolina beach—but it is also a book that heartfeltly covers topics such as grief, sibling relationships, and what it means to just get to be a kid. This book really captured my whole heart.
Cat is the glue holding her family together. When her little brother Chicken has a meltdown, she knows just how to calm him, whether it's scratching his back or reading his favourite book. They've always had a special bond. But with their mum working extra hard after their dad's death, Cat is struggling to keep everything afloat.
When Cat and Chicken unexpectedly end up spending the summer with the grandparents they've never met, Cat suddenly has the space to be a kid again. Gradually, she discovers that days on Gingerbread Island are full of fishing, fireflies and new friendships -…
I’ve loved nature and being outdoors since childhood, when I would escape our apartment complex by berry-picking in a park or sneaking onto the lush grounds of a local mental hospital. I grew up in Queens, New York, at a time of rapid development, and mourned as trees were felled for housing. I became an avid hiker, canoeist, and gardener as an adult, and serve on the board of an environmental organization in Montauk, Long Island. What we lose when we lose our connection to nature, saving our last wild places, and leaving a sustainable world to the next generation are key themes in my forthcoming novel--and personal motivation.
I love camping out in the wild, so for me reading this novel was a vicarious extended vacation.
The novel centers on a woman who escapes to Alaska with her two children and makes her way across the state in a beat-up rented recreational vehicle they call the Chateau. The fantastically flawed and appealing Josie and her two children are all wonderfully drawn. Anyone who has ever gone camping will get a kick out of all the details of life in this wreck on wheels.
The novel is not just laugh-out-loud funny; it’s also profound and deeply felt. I also wouldn’t have expected a novel that makes a compelling argument that we need to address climate change to be set in Alaska, where there’s so much untrammeled wilderness. But this novel taught me that in fact, the effects of climate change are actually more harsh closer to the poles.
'The mirror image of Eggers's brilliantly dystopian The Circle... [A] state of the nation novel, cleansing the spirit and lifting the heart' Guardian
A hilarious and heart-warming misadventure through modern America: it's time for the family vacation...
Josie's life is falling apart - lawsuits raining down, her business down the drain and a feckless husband long gone - so she gathers up her two kids and lights out for the wilderness. The Alaskan wilderness, to be specific.
This is a story about the trip of a lifetime. It involves one battered old RV,…
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