Here are 100 books that The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control fans have personally recommended if you like
The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control.
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I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I first learned about Logan Ury listening to the podcast This is Dating. While I was waiting on the second season to drop, I learned about Dr. Ury’s book.
I’m not trying to be ageist, but it was refreshing to hear dating advice from a professional that isn’t older and hasn’t been married for decades. Ury’s dating years being more recent meant she gets the landscape modern daters are struggling to find love in. Her perspective was instantly more relevant to me.
There were also several knowledge gems that she dropped throughout her book that I’d already learned the hard way, which gave me more confidence in giving the new-to-me information she presented a shot.
'A definitive guide for a generation navigating the murky waters of modern love' Esther Perel
A funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.
Have you ever looked around and wondered, "Why has everyone found love except me?" You're not the only one. Great relationships don't just appear in our lives - they're the culmination of a series of decisions, including who to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions,…
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I read this book in grad school while I was working on an essay for the Los Angeles Review of Books about choosing to be child-free.
Sometimes, you just need some real talk and a reminder that the deck really is stacked against you when it comes to dating.This book helped provide some much-needed perspective so that I could understand that there’s only so much control I have over my own singleness and that there are cultural factors at play.
If you’re single and searching, there’s no end to other people’s explanations, excuses, and criticism explaining why you haven’t found a partner:
“You’re too picky. Just find a good-enough guy and you’ll be fine.” “You’re too desperate. If men think you need them, they’ll run scared.” “You’re too independent. Smart, ambitious women always have a harder time finding mates.” “You have low self-esteem. You can’t love someone else until you’ve learned to love yourself.” “You’re too needy. You can’t be happy in a relationship until you’ve learned to be happy on your own.”
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
A lot of people know Rachel Cargle because of her activism and her community building. But her life story shows how sometimes you have to let go of what you’ve been taught to want so you’re free to go after what you really want.
Rachel wasn’t satisfied being a well-loved, stay-at-home wife in a small Ohio town. But it was hard for her to exit her marriage because we’ve all been taught to find a good man and hang on tight. Rachel did manage to leave and step onto a radically different life path. She’s open in the book about fluidity around her sexuality and exploring non-monogamy.
What would life be like if we had the courage to say, 'I want something different'?
'Elegant, thoughtful, vulnerable, and inspiring' Elizabeth Gilbert
From a highly lauded modern voice in feminism and racial justice comes a deeply personal and insightful testament to the power of reimagining - the act of creating in our mind's eye that which does not but can and should exist
We all experience breaking points, those moments when we realise that something must change. For activist, philanthropist, and CEO Rachel E. Cargle, reimagining - relationships, work, education, rest, faith and power - saw her through some…
I was the type of kid who tossed a coin in a fountain and wished that every day could be Valentine’s Day. So, it’s no surprise that my younger years were dominated by dating, love, and heartbreak. I learned enough about the matter to even have my own dating advice column for a few years. Mostly what I’ve learned is how important it is to have compassion for yourself and to know you’re not the only one having a hard time finding your forever love. I hope these book picks bring you some comfort.
I contributed an essay to this collection and there’s quite a few writers I admire in this book, as well.
It’s refreshing to see other people’s perspective on what can feel like an albatross around your neck. Some of the essays are humorous, others are more poignant, but they all work together to show that a single life can look and feel a bazillion different ways—yours will be what you make it.
A feminist anthology inspired by legendary Cosmopolitan editor Helen Gurley Brown's Sex and the Single Girl, featuring twenty-four new essays on the triumphs and heartbreaks of modern singlehood from acclaimed and bestselling authors, including Kristen Arnett, Morgan Parker, Evette Dionne, and Melissa Febos.
Sixty years ago, Helen Gurley Brown's Sex and the Single Girl sent shockwaves through the United States, selling more than two million copies in three weeks. Helen's message was radical for its time: marriage wasn't essential for women to lead rich, fulfilling lives.
As a police psychologist and mystery writer—I call myself a shrink with ink—I love to read how other authors portray therapists in their novels.It’s challenging to bring tension, action, and conflict to a 50-minute session that primarily involves quiet conversation, perhaps salted with tears. I started out writing non-fiction. Then I got tired of reality and began writing mysteries inspired by real police officers and their families. Writing fiction was harder, but more fun. Sometimes it’s been therapeutic. I especially enjoy the opportunity to take potshots at cops who treated me poorly, incompetent psychologists, and two of my ex-husbands.
I love books with sardonic humor, especially those that poke fun at psychologists and other mental health professionals. I do it in my own novels.
Most clinicians are earnest, compassionate, and ethical. But like every other profession, we have some bad apples who give psychology a bad name and deserve all the jokes and cartoons and late-night comedy sketches we get.
Shapiro’s book is about a neurotic writer with a weight problem who searches for a new therapist after her long-time clinician leaves town. Applying speed dating to her protagonist’s search for a shrink was the perfect vehicle for taking jabs at my profession.
I laughed more than I cringed. It was, for me, an opportunity to look at myself and my colleagues from the client’s point of view.
“Proust had a cookie. Susan Shapiro has a cupcake—and a really hilarious book.”
—Patricia Marx, author of Him, Her, Him Again, the End of Him
In Susan Shapiro’s laugh-out-loud funny fictional debut Speed Shrinking, Manhattan self-help author Julia Goodman thinks she’s got her addictive personality under control. Then her beloved psychoanalyst moves away at the same time her husband takes off to L.A. and her best friend gets married and moves to Ohio.
Feeling lonely and left out, Julia fills in the void with food, becomes a cupcake addict, and blimps out. This is a huge problem—especially since she’s about…
We are thrilled to present this carefully curated book list. As passionate advocates for leadership, self-mastery, and health and well-being, we have handpicked these titles to inspire and empower individuals on their journey toward personal and professional growth. Each book within this collection resonates with principles that we believe are pivotal for fostering resilience, achieving self-mastery, and maintaining a healthy and balanced lifestyle. Whether you're seeking leadership insights, self-help guidance, or ways to enhance your overall well-being, these books offer a diverse range of perspectives and actionable strategies. We hope this collection becomes a valuable resource for you on your path to personal excellence. – Colleen Callander & Shannah Kennedy.
This book is a fabulous read, as I am incredibly interested and passionate about understanding spirituality and psychology for leadership and living in the modern day. I also love a book that invites the reader to reflect and delve into self-awareness, which is the most powerful way we find our base and can begin to work with our own internal narratives and behaviours.
As a high-performing human being, this book highlights again the incredible importance of mindfulness, with practical tools for healing in this fast-paced world we live in. I can never get enough of this practice, and this book was a great and empowering read for me, adding to my own personal roadmap for life.
'My favourite Instagram account in the world.' Dr Rangan Chatterjee
'If LePera's Instagram feed is full of aha moments illuminating the inner workings of your psyche, the revelations in the book are more like a full firework display.' Red magazine
'This book is a must-read for anyone on a path of personal growth.' GABBY BERNSTEIN, author of number one New York Times bestsellers Super Attractor and The Universe Has Your Back
'The book I wish I had read in my twenties.' ELIZABETH DAY, author of How to Fail
I’ve been on a quest of healing my childhood trauma for decades. Now I’m living with gratitude and a zest for life. Let my research help you on your own unique journey. Since you’re reading this, it may be the exact time for you to move forward on your self-actualization trip! Here’s a tip: You don’t need “improvement.” You’re already good – you just need help to find it inside and believe it. Here are 5 books that helped me accept myself, made me think differently about others, and opened new possibilities for happiness and peace.
In a no-nonsense way, the author points out humans’ flawed thinking and ego-driven way of life proving that changes need to happen to find true happiness. She offers simple steps to recognize and deal with these flaws—acknowledging that it won't be easy.
Because of this book, I’m interacting differently with other people! I’m trying to be grateful for everyday things, listen actively, be curious instead of reacting, and look inward when I feel triggered. This book will help you work toward empathy with people different from you, which is so important in this divisive world.
Who deserves to be called good, and who doesn’t? When did we start believing our ideas about goodness? And does being good ultimately even matter?
In The Good Human, author Dawn K. Hammer extends an invitation to dive deep into our own inner landscapes to re-discover the inherent goodness residing there. Her simple, yet profound, practices guide readers to gently question the thoughts, beliefs, and ideologies that may be keeping them stuck in fear rather than acting from love, and furthering divisions rather than fostering connections.
As a clinical psychologist, I listen to thoughts all the time. I’m also having my own, constantly. We rely on our thoughts to help us navigate the world. However, our thoughts can also be a source of suffering. At times, they're not such reliable guides or helpers. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a way of thinking about thinking. ACT captured my imagination early in my clinical career. I trained with ACT’s originator, Steven Hayes, in the early 1990’s. I’ve come to believe that being more aware of our own thoughts, and our relationship to them is key to creating positive change and living a life grounded in our values.
Dr. Hayes is the originator of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, an innovative approach to addressing human suffering based on examining and changing our relationship to our thoughts.
This book looks at the many ways that our capacity for evaluative and judgmental thought leads to suffering. Then, it offers a map for changing how we relate to and respond to those thoughts.
It offers tools for shifting away from struggling with our internal narratives toward taking action based on our values.
"In all my years studying personal growth, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is one of the most useful tools I've ever come across, and in this book, Dr. Hayes describes it with more depth and clarity than ever before."-Mark Manson, #1 New York Times best-selling author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Life is not a problem to be solved. ACT shows how we can live full and meaningful lives by embracing our vulnerability and turning toward what hurts.
In this landmark book, the originator and pioneering researcher into Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) lays out the psychological…
I’ve been on a quest of healing my childhood trauma for decades. Now I’m living with gratitude and a zest for life. Let my research help you on your own unique journey. Since you’re reading this, it may be the exact time for you to move forward on your self-actualization trip! Here’s a tip: You don’t need “improvement.” You’re already good – you just need help to find it inside and believe it. Here are 5 books that helped me accept myself, made me think differently about others, and opened new possibilities for happiness and peace.
This book, and a couple of seminars with Byron Katie, really did change my life! I was stuck in negative thinking and couldn’t seem to get out of it. She offers a straightforward method to challenge your thoughts and turn them around to other possibilities. It‘s almost magical how your hurtful beliefs can be changed into accepting “the way it is” without the hurt.
Get this book and get some relief from whatever is bothering you. Truly.
Discover the truth hiding behind troubling thoughts with Byron Katie’s self-help classic.
In 2003, Byron Katie first introduced the world to The Work with the publication of Loving What Is. Nearly twenty years later, Loving What Is continues to inspire people all over the world to do The Work; to listen to the answers they find inside themselves;and to open their minds to profound, spacious, and life-transforming insights. The Work is simply four questions that, when applied to a specific problem, enable you to see what is troubling you in an entirely different light.
I have always cringed to hear my book described as “self-help” because it sounds dry and instructive. I prefer to describe it as a series of therapy stories. Help comes from surprising sources and I love that we can find support in our own imaginative ways. A wonderful book will always be helpful emotionally, and great writers investigate our inner lives and motivations. It’s up to each of us to insist on living exciting lives and books remind us that it’s always possible to have a fresh experience. Self-help often means embracing the complexities. There is no magical solution for figuring out life but great books make living so much better.
Oh the joys of Saul Steinberg’s drawings! More psychologically attuned than most therapy books or self-help, Steinberg’s illustrations are brilliant illuminations of what goes on in the inner lives of human beings.
I want to play and celebrate and express and engage with nature when I look at this book, and seeing my internal angst depicted visually consoles me. As a psychotherapist, I cherish words but I also see the limitations of language. It’s liberating to see what can’t always be described.
As for the labyrinth theme, it’s universal and shockingly apt as a metaphor for what goes on in our emotional lives – we are so often seduced by labyrinths – we get drawn into situations and patterns that feel impossible to resolve and yet somehow too hard to leave.
Our inner conflicts are full of mazes we feel we can’t exit but also can’t sort out – should…
A seminal work by an artist whose drawings in The New Yorker, LIFE, Harper's Bazaar, and many other publications influenced an entire generation of American artists and writers.
Saul Steinberg’s The Labyrinth, first published in 1960 and long out of print, is more than a simple catalog or collection of drawings. These carefully arranged pages record a brilliant, constantly evolving imagination confronting modern life. Here is Steinberg, as he put it at the time, discovering and inventing a great variety of events: "Illusion, talks, music, women, cats, dogs, birds, the cube, the crocodile, the museum, Moscow and Samarkand (winter, 1956),…
