100 books like Developing Your Conflict Competence

By Craig E. Runde, Tim A. Flanagan,

Here are 100 books that Developing Your Conflict Competence fans have personally recommended if you like Developing Your Conflict Competence. Shepherd is a community of 10,000+ authors and super readers sharing their favorite books with the world.

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Book cover of Happier Hour: How to Beat Distraction, Expand Your Time, and Focus on What Matters Most

Wanda T. Wallace Author Of You Can't Know It All: Leading in the Age of Deep Expertise

From my list on getting out of your comfort zone.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am passionate about helping people have the kinds of opportunities they want to have in their careers. I coach, teach, speak and write on how to do exactly that. The secret – it almost always involves getting out of your comfort zone, doing something that is a bit scary to you and that shakes your confidence a bit. However, you never want to be sitting alone trying to achieve something all by yourself. It takes a village to succeed. The art comes in knowing how to ask, getting over your fear of being vulnerable, building trust, knowing how to persuade each person you need, and much more. This is my life’s work. 

Wanda's book list on getting out of your comfort zone

Wanda T. Wallace Why did Wanda love this book?

This book inspired me personally and it has changed how I coach people to think about managing their stress and building their resilience. Especially as you step out of your comfort zone and lead in a new way, in a new area, stress will be high. Cassie’s research clearly shows that what we need to manage stress, to feel good about our lives as a whole, and to be our best self as a leader isn’t as hard as you think. The secret is 2 hours of time each day doing things you enjoy – work included.  

By Cassie Holmes,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Happier Hour as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Learn how to reframe your time around life’s happiest moments to build days that aren’t just full but fulfilling with this “joyful guide” (Eve Rodsky, New York Times bestselling author) that is the antidote to overscheduling.

Our most precious resource isn’t money. It’s time. We are allotted just twenty-four hours a day, and we live in a culture that keeps us feeling “time poor.” Since we can’t add more hours to the day, how can we experience our lives as richer?

Based on her wildly popular MBA class at UCLA, Professor Cassie Holmes demonstrates how to immediately improve our lives…


Book cover of Master Mentors: 30 Transformative Insights from Our Greatest Minds

Wanda T. Wallace Author Of You Can't Know It All: Leading in the Age of Deep Expertise

From my list on getting out of your comfort zone.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am passionate about helping people have the kinds of opportunities they want to have in their careers. I coach, teach, speak and write on how to do exactly that. The secret – it almost always involves getting out of your comfort zone, doing something that is a bit scary to you and that shakes your confidence a bit. However, you never want to be sitting alone trying to achieve something all by yourself. It takes a village to succeed. The art comes in knowing how to ask, getting over your fear of being vulnerable, building trust, knowing how to persuade each person you need, and much more. This is my life’s work. 

Wanda's book list on getting out of your comfort zone

Wanda T. Wallace Why did Wanda love this book?

This book gives exactly the lift you need to believe you can do more. There are inspiring, short stories of things leaders have done and the impact it left on the author. I like the personal take on each chapter. It’s very readable and very relatable. Read a chapter, share a chapter with your team, talk about what you liked with others. It’s a great way to get a quick uplift without fretting over not finishing the book.  

By Scott Jeffrey Miller,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Master Mentors as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

For busy professionals and lifelong learners seeking practical strategies for reaching new heights, Master Mentors distills 30 essential learnings from Seth Godin, Susan Cain, Trent Shelton, General Stanley McChrystal, and other top business minds and thought leaders of our time.

Mining the best and brightest revelations from FranklinCovey's global podcast, On Leadership with Scott Miller, Scott personally introduces you to 30 Master Mentors, featuring the single most transformative insight from each of them.

Depending on where you are in your journey, Master Mentors will:

Challenge your current mindset and beliefs, leading to what could be the most important career and…


Book cover of Ask More: The Power of Questions to Open Doors, Uncover Solutions, and Spark Change

Wanda T. Wallace Author Of You Can't Know It All: Leading in the Age of Deep Expertise

From my list on getting out of your comfort zone.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am passionate about helping people have the kinds of opportunities they want to have in their careers. I coach, teach, speak and write on how to do exactly that. The secret – it almost always involves getting out of your comfort zone, doing something that is a bit scary to you and that shakes your confidence a bit. However, you never want to be sitting alone trying to achieve something all by yourself. It takes a village to succeed. The art comes in knowing how to ask, getting over your fear of being vulnerable, building trust, knowing how to persuade each person you need, and much more. This is my life’s work. 

Wanda's book list on getting out of your comfort zone

Wanda T. Wallace Why did Wanda love this book?

I believe leaders need to ask better questions. Questions are the secret to delegating effectively, to coaching and mentoring, to holding people accountable, to generating ideas, and to creating psychological safety even. Every leader needs a set of go-to questions for different purposes. Frank Sesno is a well-known CNN reporter who has written the ultimate guide to asking questions. The key message: frame the question for what you want to know. Great stories and a fun read.  

By Frank Sesno,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Ask More as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

What hidden skill links successful people in all walks of life--across cultures, industries, generations . . . all of time? The answer is surprisingly simple: they know how to ask the right questions at the right time. Questions help us break down barriers, discover secrets, solve puzzles, and imagine new ways of doing things. The right question can provide for us not only the answer we need right then but also the ones we'll need tomorrow. Emmy award-winning journalist and media expert Frank Sesno wants to teach you how to question others in a methodical, intentional way so that you…


Book cover of The Art of Woo: Using Strategic Persuasion to Sell Your Ideas

Wanda T. Wallace Author Of You Can't Know It All: Leading in the Age of Deep Expertise

From my list on getting out of your comfort zone.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am passionate about helping people have the kinds of opportunities they want to have in their careers. I coach, teach, speak and write on how to do exactly that. The secret – it almost always involves getting out of your comfort zone, doing something that is a bit scary to you and that shakes your confidence a bit. However, you never want to be sitting alone trying to achieve something all by yourself. It takes a village to succeed. The art comes in knowing how to ask, getting over your fear of being vulnerable, building trust, knowing how to persuade each person you need, and much more. This is my life’s work. 

Wanda's book list on getting out of your comfort zone

Wanda T. Wallace Why did Wanda love this book?

Everyone wants to have more influence, be more persuasive, sell their ideas better and have greater impact. Richard Shell is one of the smartest people I have ever met on how influence works. I think I know a good bit about the topic and I learn something every time I talk with him. This is my favorite among his many books on influence – there are many and you cannot go wrong with any of them.  

By G. Richard Shell, Mario Moussa,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Art of Woo as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

You may need The Art of War to defeat your enemies, but if you prefer to win them over, read The Art of Woo

G. Richard Shell and Mario Moussa know what it takes to drive new ideas through complex organizations. They have advised thousands of executives from companies such as Google, Microsoft, and General Electric to organizations like the World Bank and even the FBI's hostage rescue training program. In The Art of Woo, they present their systematic, four- step process for winning over even the toughest bosses and most skeptical colleagues. Beginning with two powerful self-assessments to help…


Book cover of High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out

Bruce A. Tate Author Of Seven Languages in Seven Weeks

From my list on technology adoption through history.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a serial adventurer and entrepreneur who loves to read, teach, and encounter our world in as many different ways as I can. I am an innately curious programmer and a goal-oriented completionist at heart. I’ve cruised around America’s Great Loop, run a marathon, written more than fifteen books, and been involved with many small businesses. I also love to work with new programming languages. I was around for the early days of the Java, Ruby, and Elixir programming languages. I built teams to build products using each one of them. My passion is to help programmers break through their blockers with fresh insights. 

Bruce's book list on technology adoption through history

Bruce A. Tate Why did Bruce love this book?

Adoption and change often lead to the kind of conflict that regularly breaks people.

I find that creators are often equipped to deal with technical creation, but are rarely equipped to deal with conflict. In this book, Amanda Ripley walks through how several skilled professionals found themselves in conflict.

Then she walks through how those conflicts started, who the players are, how they interact, how to engage in healthy conflict, and eventually how to get back out again.

Many of my peers in open-source technology, especially creators of languages and frameworks, find themselves in conflict and don’t have the tools to deal with it.

This book helped me think of conflict in a systematic way, and how to plot a course back out again. 

By Amanda Ripley,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked High Conflict as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

When we are baffled by the insanity of the "other side"-in our politics, at work, or at home-it's because we aren't seeing how the conflict itself has taken over.

That's what "high conflict" does. It's the invisible hand of our time. And it's different from the useful friction of healthy conflict. That's good conflict, and it's a necessary force that pushes us to be better people.

High conflict, by contrast, is what happens when discord distills into a good-versus-evil kind of feud, the kind with an us and a them. In this state, the normal rules of engagement no longer…


Book cover of The Anatomy of Peace: Resolving the Heart of Conflict

Zachary Elwood Author Of Defusing American Anger: A Guide to Understanding Our Fellow Citizens and Reducing Us-vs-Them Polarization

From my list on healing the political divides in America.

Why am I passionate about this?

For my psychology podcast, I’ve interviewed many political and psychology experts on the subject of political polarization and conflict resolution. That led to me writing my book Defusing American Anger. I believe extreme us-vs-them polarization is humanity’s biggest problem: I see it as an existential threat not just to specific nations, including America, but to humanity as a whole, especially as our weapons and technologies get more powerful. And I think we need more people working on reducing our seemingly natural tendency to always be fighting with each other. 

Zachary's book list on healing the political divides in America

Zachary Elwood Why did Zachary love this book?

This book is not about America, and not directly about politics or political polarization. It's a well-known conflict resolution book. I included it because I think it might help some people see our divides through a different and more healthy lens. 

This book uses an engaging fictional premise to walk through some important points about resolving conflict. For example, it talks about how even when we're sure we're right in a conflict (as most people in conflicts tend to be), we may still be wrong in how we treat others. And it talks about how our animosity and contempt towards others can cause them to behave in the very ways that most upset us.

By The Arbinger Institute,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked The Anatomy of Peace as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

From the authors of Leadership and Self-Deception (over 2 million copies sold) comes a new edition of this bestseller that has been thoroughly revised to more effectively address the diversity, equity, and inclusion challenges that plague our communities and hinder our organizations.

What if conflicts at home, at work, and in the world stem from the same root cause? What if we systematically misunderstand that cause? And what if, as a result, we unwittingly perpetuate the very problems we think we are trying to solve?

The Anatomy of Peace uses a fictional story of an Arab and a Jew—both of…


Book cover of Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People)

Maryanne O'Brien Author Of The Elevated Communicator: How to Master Your Style and Strengthen Well-Being at Work

From my list on communication and building trusted relationships.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a work in progress, on my way to becoming a conscious communicator and an even better human being. I believe that intentional communication and (the) quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives, careers, and societies. I’ve spent decades guiding people and cultures to foster open communication, cultivate self-understanding, and deepen trust, from large Fortune 500 to small businesses. Building communication skills is a practice that leads to self-transformation and finding meaning, and happiness. Each of these books will help you to better understand yourself and others, and learn to communicate at the level of trust.

Maryanne's book list on communication and building trusted relationships

Maryanne O'Brien Why did Maryanne love this book?

A practical guide to understanding yourself, understanding others, and how to improve workplace relationships through better communication.

If you’ve been in the workplace for any length of time, you know that collaboration is a must for career success and that there’s usually at least one challenging person that can destroy trust and tank your productivity. In this book, you’ll learn strategies for identifying the eight types of difficult co-workers and gain insights into their motivations.

She also provides actionable advice for how to step into these difficult conversations, so you can build better relationships. 

By Amy Gallo,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Getting Along as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Named one of "22 new books...that you should consider reading before the year is out" by Fortune

"This practical and empathetic guide to taking the high road is worth a look for workers lost in conflict." - Publisher's Weekly

A research-based, practical guide for how to handle difficult people at work.

Work relationships can be hard. The stress of dealing with difficult people dampens our creativity and productivity, degrades our ability to think clearly and make sound decisions, and causes us to disengage. We might lie awake at night worrying, withdraw from work, or react in ways we later regret-rolling…


Book cover of Peacemakers in Action: Volume 2: Profiles in Religious Peacebuilding

Georgette F. Bennett Ph.D. Author Of Religicide: Confronting the Roots of Anti-Religious Violence

From my list on human rights that focus on religion.

Why am I passionate about this?

Between us, we’ve been in the interreligious relations business for a combined 50 years. We started working together when Jerry was Deputy Assistant Secretary of State under President Barack Obama. In 2015, we were both invited by Prince Ghazi of Jordan to join other interreligious leaders to advance a UN resolution defining and taking a stand against religicide. That resolution never made it to the Security Council. But we joined forces to sound the alarm about religicide. We wrote our book in the hope of inspiring an international campaign to end this killing in the name of God – or being killed because of your God.   

Georgette's book list on human rights that focus on religion

Georgette F. Bennett Ph.D. Why did Georgette love this book?

With all that has been written about religion as a cause of violence, here are two volumes of case studies about how religion is used by individuals on the ground to stop violence. The case studies feature the heroic individuals in the Peacemakers in Action Network of the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding. They operate in conflict zones around the world and this book reveals the methods and techniques they use to transform conflicts. I founded Tanenbaum in 1992 and this signature program was inspired and guided by the late Ambassador Richard Holbrooke.

By Joyce S. Dubensky (editor),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Peacemakers in Action as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Every day, men and women risk their lives to stop violence in religiously charged conflicts around the world. You may not know their names - but you should. Peacemakers in Action, Volume 2 provides a window into the triumphs, risks, failures, and lessons learned of eight remarkable, religiously motivated peacemakers including: * A Methodist bishop in the Democratic Republic of the Congo who confronts armed warlords on his front lawn * A Christian who travels to Syria to coordinate medical aid and rebuild postwar communities * A Muslim woman, not knowing how Kabul's imams will react, arrives to train them…


Book cover of Lawyers as Peacemakers: Practicing Holistic, Problem-Solving Law

Kate Vitasek Author Of Contracting in the New Economy: Using Relational Contracts to Boost Trust and Collaboration in Strategic Business Relationships

From my list on developing strategic business contracts.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am an international authority for my award-winning research on the Vested® business model for highly collaborative relationships. I began my research in 2003 by studying what makes the difference in successful strategic business deals. My day job is the lead faculty and researcher for the University of Tennessee’s Certified Deal Architect program; my passion is helping organizations and individuals learn the art, science, and practice of crafting highly collaborative win-win strategic business relationships. My work has led to seven books and three Harvard Business Review articles and I’ve shared my advice on CNN International, Bloomberg, NPR, and Fox Business News.

Kate's book list on developing strategic business contracts

Kate Vitasek Why did Kate love this book?

In contracting, lawyers are often the heavies that swoop in at the end of the negotiation with risk-averse and protective conditions that can delay or derail a strategic business relationship. This book is the top pick on my list because Kim Wright advocates for organizations (and lawyers themselves!) to make the shift to a holistic, problem-solving approach. I am a strong believer in a kinder, gentler legal involvement at the beginning of the negotiation designed to help contracting parties solve problems and issues jointly. Wright eloquently makes her case on why the shift is needed. After you read this book you too will see the need for the shift of focus away from traditional contracting paradigms.

By J. Kim Wright,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Lawyers as Peacemakers as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Teaches lawyers new ways of finding satisfaction in thier practice and providing comprehensive, solution-focused services to clients; sometimes it's not about winning, it's about finding the best possible answer for everyone involved.


Book cover of Monsters in Love: Why Your Partner Sometimes Drives You Crazy-and What You Can Do About It

Pavini Moray Author Of How to Hold Power: A Somatic Approach to Becoming a Leader People Love and Respect

From my list on creating business relationships that feel alive.

Why am I passionate about this?

As a human, I struggle with staying connected during conflict. Because conflict naturally shows up in all relationships, I had to figure out how to do it better, or die alone! My path has woven through studying conflict resolution, becoming a relationship therapist, doing deep learning within my own life partnership, and exploring the realm of somatic psychology in my doctoral work. I long for a world where we have the skills we need to work through conflict without resorting to violence. In my dreams, the world is able to coexist with love and conflict. Our relationships thrive when we speak our full truth, and embody our values in action.

Pavini's book list on creating business relationships that feel alive

Pavini Moray Why did Pavini love this book?

The theme of this book is growing up and relating in a way that honors your own integrity.

Menakem is a relationship therapist and a long-time married person who promotes the idea of clean pain vs. dirty pain. Clean pain is doing the hard work of speaking what is true for you in your relationship. Dirty pain is blaming or manipulating your partner.

With a rare and rigorous honesty, I learned from this book that conflict is actually necessary for healthy relationships. 

By Resmaa Menakem,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Monsters in Love as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Conflict is a natural part of any intimate relationship. Yet most couples either avoid it or try to smooth over their differences. This results in at least one partner compromising their integrity-and stunting their own growth.

Monsters in Love challenges the idea that conflict between partners is unhealthy or something to avoid. Instead, it encourages both people to stand by what they need and who they are-but to do so with compassion rather than competitiveness or vengefulness. This is the purpose of an intimate relationship: to create an atmosphere where both people learn to grow up and mature in their…


5 book lists we think you will like!

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