The most recommended books on stepfamilies

I first read this book pre-publication in 2016, and I still think about it at least once a week.

The story is a haunting portrayal of a girl lost in a blended family with a stepmother who treats her worse than Cinderella and a father who only wants to see the shiny surface of his shiny new family. It’s told in a then/now timeline which slowly reveals not only what June did to land her on death row but the abuse she endured that got her there. This one is heavy, but oh so worth the read.

Macy’s mom is getting married and Macy isn’t looking forward to a new step-dad and two pesky little step-sisters. When Macy and her best friend have a falling out, the crabby ancient woman next door—who doesn’t even know sign language—couldn’t possibly become an ally…or could she? I love the free verse format of this novel, and the use of bolded text for dialogue, and how Macy’s hearing impairment is a streamlined and interesting aspect of her characterization.   

This next book is gritty in its authenticity. It isn’t for the faint of heart to read about the heartbreaking struggles of thirteen-year-old Anna Collette whose mother tries to take her life and is hospitalized. Anna has to live with her distant father, his new wife, and their baby where she doesn’t feel like part of the family. But the author gives us a warm and loving character in her stepmother who shows Della what family can be. I’m enthralled by true and complex characters in this book who represent the highs and lows of real life.

There are multiple possible interpretations for this very well illustrated story: it’s above moving from one habitation to another, but also on, a more symbolic level, about reconstituted families. At least, this is the sense it has for the adult because for children it’s much simpler, we see here sympathetic animals building a house in the forest.

This heartwarming novel is full of soccer, touching family dynamics, and girl power. It stars a feisty sixth-grader named Bea who has to adjust to a new house, a new school, a new blended family, and a new neighbor who’s gunning for her position on the soccer field. At first, Bea is determined to look out for herself and protect her turf, but then she and her neighbor team up to fight against sexism and form the first-ever all-girls squad. The team dynamics in this book will make any reader cheer. Soccer fans will love the on-field action, but this gem of a novel also has humor, emotional depth, delightful and inspiring characters, and even references to the beloved Katherine Paterson novel Bridge to Terabithia!

Rohinton Mistry’s masterwork Family Matters is as precise and delicate and realistic as Rushdie’s work is fantastical and flamboyant, a whisper instead of a shout. This book has a special resonance for me because the main characters are Parsi, a small, unique community in India, followers of the Zoroastrian faith that I was raised in. Mistry’s canvas is deceptively small and domestic—the squabbles of a family over caregiving and physical space—but this belies the emotional power of this moving novel. This is a 19th-century novel transposed to 21st-century India.

Bill Doherty is an astute psychologist and master storyteller who draws on a great store of examples and anecdotes from his work as a family therapist and director of the University of Minnesota’s Marriage and Family Therapy Program. What he sees most often missing in modern parents is not love, but the confident exercise of authority. His short book is an excellent tutorial on how to practice that. He’s right to emphasize it: At all developmental levels, studies find that an “authoritative” (not authoritarian) style of parenting is the one most often associated with kids’ becoming confident, respectful, and responsible persons. This parenting style values both obedience to adult requirements and independence in children, explains the reasons behind rules, allows give and take, but doesn’t permit kids to treat parents as peers.

Doherty’s chapter on 11 guidelines for giving and getting respect is a gem. He also offers good advice… show more.

This graphic novel is based on Lucy’s real life. It’s about a girl who begrudgingly moves from her home in the city to the country to live with her mom’s new boyfriend and share a bedroom with his daughters. I love this one because when you’re a kid, so many things are out of your control, and grown-ups are the ones making decisions for you. Sometimes, kids are forced to learn a whole new way of life. Stepping Stones is a great depiction of that experience—an experience I can relate to as someone whose mom remarried and then had to move towns and schools. I love how the main character, Jen, is terrible at math but has to handle money at the farmer’s market. She spends the summer persevering through her math troubles, her embarrassment related to it, and her new family and farm work expectations. 

The Ring Bearer is a celebration of a blended family. Jackson has a big job: he must carry the ring in his mother’s wedding ceremony. He’s nervous. What if he drops it? What if he trips? The simple action of this story is relatable for kids and, even more importantly, they will connect with the deeper fears Jackson faces—big changes, new family dynamics, and sharing love. Also, Floyd Cooper’s illustrations? Stunning.  

This book is insane. Absolutely nuts. But there’s a strong, compelling plot sneakily moving the eccentric, confused characters forward, I couldn’t help but tag along with them. Besides, there were cats featured as main characters. And I’m a cat lady. Resistance was futile! 

For a book to really engage me, it needs to compel me to constantly be thinking, “What happens next?” I enjoy having my curiosity piqued, and boy, did this crazy ride do that.

Mortality. White Noise is not so much a novel. To me, it's more of a wildly amusing collection of clever observations about life. The book's protagonist is a professor of Hitler studies, something he invented. And that's not the last thing he invents. He's invented a patchwork family of absurd proportions. In fact, he invents so much that he doesn't know what to believe. And there we are at the center of this novel: what can we believe in when we don't even know if death is finite or if there is life after death. The absurdity of mortality as we ride through American academia. If you sometimes wonder if it's all real or just a simulation, this book is for you.

With two simple words--“dog” and “cat”-- in several configurations, Cat Dog Dog explores the stress of settling into a blended family as well as the power of pets to bring people together. If a child can recognize these two three-letter words, they can read this book independently. The illustrations are worth a thousand words.

When Auden spends the summer with her dad and his new family in coastal North Carolina, she never expects that a friendship with a new boy Eli will change everything she’s believed about life and love. A burgeoning romance and deep secrets shared under a Carolina moon on late-night adventures while the rest of the town sleeps? Can you get any more magical than that? This one is all about healing and blooming and taking the chance to be yourself against the backdrop of a quirky-cute beach town.

Yes, it’s a thing, and my dear friend Nicole Galland makes the most out of it in her funny and moving “rom-com” of a book about a different kind of blended family—one that involves an Irish actor in need of a green card, his new love, and her beloved dog. This book is a romp and a road trip for dog lovers and the lovers of dog lovers.

The Children of Lir is one of Ireland’s best-known myths. Over the years it has been more than a little sanitized, and as a consequence almost entirely relegated to a children’s beloved fairytale. With her rich, poetic prose and unflinching honesty, Deirdre Sullivan brings the story right back into the adult sphere. Her characters emerge, flawed and seething, from the magical fog of myth to hurt and help each other, and to drag the enthralled reader with them through aeons of vengeance, loyalty, and, eventually, peace.

I can’t stress how beautiful this novel is. An epic poem almost, it satisfies my hunger for beautiful prose, and for thematic depth and emotional resonance. If you love gorgeous writing as much as I do, you will love this one.

Abbi Glines is the best at writing fun, steamy, New Adult summer romances.

You can’t help but be immediately immersed into the story, especially with all of the angst and drama and tension that leaves you needing to see how it’ll all work out. This book has got all those fun tropes that make a great poolside read: bad boy/good girl, enemies to lovers, step-siblings, forced proximity, and a coastal beach town.

In this fictional representation of her own childhood in a blended family, Patchett shows how miserable the children were, but also the odd partnerships and roles they set up between themselves. Showing us both how their parents’ lives got tangled, and how the five remaining children interacted in later life, Patchett tells a tale of an American era.

I loved this book for its precision in both external details and the aching truths of how the characters feel. In refusing to ignore the cruelty of the children and the indifference of the parents, Patchett gets it right. But she also describes the aftermath of a tragedy which does not, quite, tear a family apart.

Ava and her dad have the kind of relationship that would have fascinated me at the age of twelve, because they get along great! Ava doesn’t remember her mother; it’s always been just her and her dad. When Dad introduces Ava to the Girlfriend, Ava’s anxiety disorder kicks in and she can’t stop her thoughts from spiraling into all the negative possibilities. I love the way Crocker uses humor to gently poke at some of Ava’s fears (killer ground squirrels!) while never belittling them and even offering tips on dealing with anxiety at the end of some chapters. This is a great look at how changing relationships and blending families can be a challenge to process for kids and adults alike.

I’m cheating and throwing in a middle grade novel! It’s that good! This one can be read independently or as a read-aloud. (Side note: I still read every night to my 14- and 10-year-olds and plan to for as long as they’ll let me.) A story about redefining family, Two Naomis explores the growing relationship—first antagonistic and slowly becoming loving—between Naomi Marie and Naomi Edith, whose parents become seriously involved. Hilarious and full of heart, this story is a great contemporary take on divorce and blended families. And Audrey and Olugbemisola are brilliant human beings and make a kick-ass writing team to boot!

I’ve read several books by this author. They are fairly short reads. The other books that I’ve read by this author are ghost stories. This one stood out because it wasn’t just a story about a ghost. It was also a story about a vampire. A young girl named Cynda goes to stay with her father and his new family in Maine. While there, she meets Vincent, an older man who turns out to be a vampire.

This book stayed true to the traditional image of evil vampires who prey on young women. There were times when I wanted to shout warnings to Cynda. The book was suspenseful. I was anxious to see how it would turn out. The ghost definitely added to the mystery of the story.