100 books like Reclaiming Conversation

By Sherry Turkle,

Here are 100 books that Reclaiming Conversation fans have personally recommended if you like Reclaiming Conversation. Shepherd is a community of 12,000+ authors and super readers sharing their favorite books with the world.

When you buy books, we may earn a commission that helps keep our lights on (or join the rebellion as a member).

Book cover of Strong Towns: A Bottom-Up Revolution to Rebuild American Prosperity

Richard Kyte Author Of Finding Your Third Place: Building Happier Communities (and Making Great Friends Along the Way)

From my list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities.

Why am I passionate about this?

I grew up in a very small town in northern Minnesota (which also happens to be home to the world’s largest turkey). The town had a vibrant community spirit, which I took for granted then. For the last 15 years, I have been passionately learning how to create flourishing communities that can make our lives better and be great places for raising the next generation of children. This list reflects the best of what I have learned and incorporated into teaching classes on the topic of “building community.” 

Richard's book list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities

Richard Kyte Why did Richard love this book?

I didn’t expect to love this book as much as I did. Charles Marohn comes from an engineering background, which makes his urban design approach very interesting.

This book has changed the way I look at cities and towns. I drive past a new big box store with its huge parking lot and think, what a waste of economic opportunity. I can’t count the number of people I have recommended this book to. 

By Charles L. Marohn Jr.,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Strong Towns as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A new way forward for sustainable quality of life in cities of all sizes

Strong Towns: A Bottom-Up Revolution to Build American Prosperity is a book of forward-thinking ideas that breaks with modern wisdom to present a new vision of urban development in the United States. Presenting the foundational ideas of the Strong Towns movement he co-founded, Charles Marohn explains why cities of all sizes continue to struggle to meet their basic needs, and reveals the new paradigm that can solve this longstanding problem.

Inside, you'll learn why inducing growth and development has been the conventional response to urban financial…


Book cover of Happy City: Transforming Our Lives Through Urban Design

Richard Kyte Author Of Finding Your Third Place: Building Happier Communities (and Making Great Friends Along the Way)

From my list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities.

Why am I passionate about this?

I grew up in a very small town in northern Minnesota (which also happens to be home to the world’s largest turkey). The town had a vibrant community spirit, which I took for granted then. For the last 15 years, I have been passionately learning how to create flourishing communities that can make our lives better and be great places for raising the next generation of children. This list reflects the best of what I have learned and incorporated into teaching classes on the topic of “building community.” 

Richard's book list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities

Richard Kyte Why did Richard love this book?

I like the way Montgomery connects the rich and varied happiness research to discuss how to design better cities. The book is packed with information, but the wealth of examples from Montgomery’s experiences in many different settings kept me engaged and entertained all through.

This is the best place to begin if you want to understand the new urbanism movement. 

By Charles Montgomery,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Happy City as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Happy City is the story of how the solutions to this century's problems lie in unlocking the secrets to great city living

This is going to be the century of the city. But what actually makes a good city? Why are some cities a joy to live in?

As Charles Montgomery reveals, it's not how much money your neighbours earn, or how pleasant the climate is that makes the most difference. Journeying to dozens of cities - from Atlanta to Bogota to Vancouver - he talks to the new champions of the happy city to explore the urban innovations already…


Book cover of Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community

Richard Kyte Author Of Finding Your Third Place: Building Happier Communities (and Making Great Friends Along the Way)

From my list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities.

Why am I passionate about this?

I grew up in a very small town in northern Minnesota (which also happens to be home to the world’s largest turkey). The town had a vibrant community spirit, which I took for granted then. For the last 15 years, I have been passionately learning how to create flourishing communities that can make our lives better and be great places for raising the next generation of children. This list reflects the best of what I have learned and incorporated into teaching classes on the topic of “building community.” 

Richard's book list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities

Richard Kyte Why did Richard love this book?

This book has changed my personal and professional life. It has made me aware of how essential social interaction and civic engagement are to the health of communities and nations. It made me want to become more involved in organizations, get to know my neighbors and integrate social capital into just about everything I write and every course I teach.

It is loaded with information, charts, and graphs and can be a slog to read cover to cover. However, it is also essential to understand what is happening today.

By Robert D. Putnam,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Bowling Alone as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Once we bowled in leagues, usually after work -- but no longer. This seemingly small phenomenon symbolizes a significant social change that Robert Putnam has identified in this brilliant volume, Bowling Alone, which The Economist hailed as "a prodigious achievement."

Drawing on vast new data that reveal Americans' changing behavior, Putnam shows how we have become increasingly disconnected from one another and how social structures -- whether they be PTA, church, or political parties -- have disintegrated. Until the publication of this groundbreaking work, no one had so deftly diagnosed the harm that these broken bonds have wreaked on our…


Book cover of Celebrating the Third Place: Inspiring Stories About the Great Good Places at the Heart of Our Communities

Richard Kyte Author Of Finding Your Third Place: Building Happier Communities (and Making Great Friends Along the Way)

From my list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities.

Why am I passionate about this?

I grew up in a very small town in northern Minnesota (which also happens to be home to the world’s largest turkey). The town had a vibrant community spirit, which I took for granted then. For the last 15 years, I have been passionately learning how to create flourishing communities that can make our lives better and be great places for raising the next generation of children. This list reflects the best of what I have learned and incorporated into teaching classes on the topic of “building community.” 

Richard's book list on building strong, healthy, friendly communities

Richard Kyte Why did Richard love this book?

I learned about this book from a friend in a coffee shop in Waco, Texas. He mentioned that the coffee shop was a “third place.” I asked him what he meant, and he referred me to this book, which introduced the world to the idea that home is one’s first place, work is one’s second place, and one’s third place is where one goes to socialize. After reading it, you will want to have a third place.  

By Ray Oldenburg,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Celebrating the Third Place as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Nationwide, more and more entrepreneurs are committing themselves to creating and running "third places," also known as "great good places." In his landmark work, The Great Good Place, Ray Oldenburg identified, portrayed, and promoted those third places. Now, more than ten years after the original publication of that book, the time has come to celebrate the many third places that dot the American landscape and foster civic life. With 20 black-and-white photographs, Celebrating the Third Place brings together fifteen firsthand accounts by proprietors of third places, as well as appreciations by fans who have made spending time at these hangouts…


Book cover of Program or Be Programmed: Ten Commands for a Digital Age

Michael L. Littman Author Of Code to Joy: Why Everyone Should Learn a Little Programming

From my list on computing and why it’s important and interesting.

Why am I passionate about this?

Saying just the right words in just the right way can cause a box of electronics to behave however you want it to behave… that’s an idea that has captivated me ever since I first played around with a computer at Radio Shack back in 1979. I’m always on the lookout for compelling ways to convey the topic to people who are open-minded, but maybe turned off by things that are overly technical. I teach computer science and study artificial intelligence as a way of expanding what we can get computers to do on our behalf.

Michael's book list on computing and why it’s important and interesting

Michael L. Littman Why did Michael love this book?

The book offers a stark choice: (a) Learn how computers work and the language we use to tell them what to do, or (b) Become digital roadkill.

It's a sentiment that I agree with wholeheartedly, but would never assert so aggressively. The book was written during the early days of the rise social media and the author presciently was aware that society was being overtaken, programmed, by this development. Again, I think he was totally right and our relationship with computers has degraded significantly in the years that followed. We need a revolution!

By Douglas Rushkoff, Leland Purvis (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked Program or Be Programmed as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The debate over whether the Net is good or bad for us fills the airwaves and the blogosphere. But for all the heat of claim and counter-claim, the argument is essentially beside the point: It’s here; it’s everywhere. The real question is, do we direct technology, or do we let ourselves be directed by it and those who have mastered it? “Choose the former,” writes Rushkoff, “and you gain access to the control panel of civilization. Choose the latter, and it could be the last real choice you get to make.”

In ten chapters, composed of ten “commands” accompanied by…


Book cover of Bandwidth

Michael C. Bland Author Of The Price of Safety

From my list on a future we probably want to avoid.

Why am I passionate about this?

My father wanted to be an astrophysicist, and as a kid I caught his passion for the future from the many science fiction books he’d left throughout our house. As an adult, the advances in technology have brought the future envisioned in those books closer than ever. My passion for what awaits us led me to write The Price of Safety, which contains innovations that are right around the corner—and have already started to come true (which is freaky), between Elon Musk’s cranial implants to DNA tracking. The world we live in is becoming more like the world in my books. I hope we’re ready! 

Michael's book list on a future we probably want to avoid

Michael C. Bland Why did Michael love this book?

Peper’s novel is about how the technology available in the near future, which seems like a gift, can be used against you. (Sound familiar?)

In this instance, it is being used to potentially change humanity’s fate, and the main character has to decide what to do about it, if anything. The book stuck with me as it involves power, corruption, and the risks of relying too much on technology.

It’s a complex story, trying to encapsulate the threats our future holds, not only in terms of technology but the damage to our environment and how both could impact our survival.

There are elements of my novel in terms of having neural feeds, though the story explores how life would be experienced if you could capture every moment (not that I personally want to capture everything that happens in my own life).

By Eliot Peper,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Bandwidth as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A rising star at a preeminent political lobbying firm, Dag Calhoun represents the world's most powerful technology and energy executives. But when a close brush with death reveals that the influence he wields makes him a target, impossible cracks appear in his perfect, richly appointed life.

Like everyone else, Dag relies on his digital feed for everything-a feed that is as personal as it is pervasive, and may not be as private as it seems. As he struggles to make sense of the dark forces closing in on him, he discovers that activists are hijacking the feed to manipulate markets…


Book cover of How to Have Impossible Conversations: A Very Practical Guide

Melinda Lewis Author Of Social Policy for Effective Practice: A Strengths Approach

From my list on igniting students’ passions about policy change.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a policy advocate, grassroots activist, university professor, and author committed to social change—at scale—to advance social work values of racial, economic, environmental, and social justice. Recognizing that most social workers are drawn to our profession because they want to make a difference in the lives of their clients, one by one, I invest my energies and skills to making policy study and practice accessible, relevant, and urgent. My students quickly get used to noting the book recommendations I sprinkle throughout class discussions and in assignment feedback, because when you see the world through a social policy frame, everything has a policy implication! 

Melinda's book list on igniting students’ passions about policy change

Melinda Lewis Why did Melinda love this book?

There are many examples in this book that make my students angry—which is one of the reasons I want them to read it.

As people committed to engaging with others to pursue justice, we have to become proficient—if never comfortable—in having conversations with people who do not share our worldview, and in using our active listening skills and deep regard for human relationships to find common ground.

The skills and practices in this book equip us for effective engagement beyond the silos we frequent, help us see our own arguments as others may encounter them, and catalyze the kind of thoughtful interactions social change demands. 

By Peter Boghossian, James Lindsay,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked How to Have Impossible Conversations as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

In our current political climate, it seems impossible to have a civil conversation with someone who has a different opinion. Dialogue is shut down when perspectives clash. Heated debates on Facebook and Twitter often lead to shaming, hindering any possibility of productive discourse. How to Have Impossible Conversations guides readers through the process of having effective, civil discussions about any divisive issues--not just religious faith but climate change, race, gender, poverty, immigration, and gun control.

Coauthors Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay distinguish between two types of conversations: those that are oriented toward arriving at truth, and those that may require…


Book cover of Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time

M.J. Clark Author Of Shut Up and Manage: A Quiet Leader's Guide to Engaging Others

From my list on become an exceptional manager.

Why am I passionate about this?

I use the knowledge I’ve gained as an executive coach for 14 years and with a master’s degree in organizational communication to help organizations and individuals more effectively communicate with and engage others in the workplace and in their personal lives. I actively practice what I preach and constantly look for new information to help myself and others become better leaders, managers, and people.

M.J.'s book list on become an exceptional manager

M.J. Clark Why did M.J. love this book?

This book is great for better understanding how to be fully present in a conversation, how to be authentic and say what needs to be said even when it’s uncomfortable, and how to have tough conversations at work to keep great employees connected and motivated. The book is chock full of great examples of conversations and suggestions of how to say things more effectively.

By Susan Scott,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Fierce Conversations as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The conversation is the relationship. Fierce Conversations is a way of conducting business. An attitude. A way of life. Expert Susan Scott maintains that a single conversation can change the trajectory of a career, marriage or life. Whether it's conversations with yourself, partner, colleagues, customers, family or friends, Fierce Conversations shows you how to have conversations that count. Scott reveals how to: Overcome barriers to meaningful conversations; Express who you are and what you believe; Confront tough issues with courage, confidence and sensitivity; Overcome fear to get to the heart of the problem; Inspire followers, attract believers and build visions…


Book cover of Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

Marcia Naomi Berger Author Of Marriage Minded: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love

From my list on dating toward marriage.

Why am I passionate about this?

Marcia Naomi Berger's passion is to help people create lasting, fulfilling marriages. An experienced clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and medical school clinical faculty member, Berger has held senior-level positions in child welfare, alcoholism treatment, and psychiatry. She says, "I stayed single for a long time because of my parent's divorce. Now happily married for over thirty-four years, I fill my books with the hard-earned wisdom I've gained professionally and personally."  

Marcia's book list on dating toward marriage

Marcia Naomi Berger Why did Marcia love this book?

This book can help many communication-challenged couples. It offers specific guidance on how to talk about topics for partners to address to foster long-term happiness. Couples who are dating and not yet committed will learn if deal-breakers exist by having conversations about whether they want children, what fidelity means to them, whether they're likely to support each other's goals and dreams, and more.

I strongly agree with the authors' ideas about addressing conflict with the goal of understanding rather than winning, making your relationship your top priority to succeed in marriage, and having fun together.

Many happily married people implement the ideas naturally without following the Eight Dates formula. However, as a couples therapist, I know that many will benefit from having the kinds of conversations the authors prescribe. I'm recommending this book to couples in my practice.

By John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Doug Abrams , Rachel Carlton Abrams

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Eight Dates as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Happily Ever After is not by chance - it's By Choice.

John and Julie Gottman are cofounders of the Gottman Institute, bestselling authors, and award-winning researchers. Together, they have a deep understanding of what makes relationships work. Now, they bring that lifetime's worth of knowledge, research, and wisdom to bear in Eight Dates, a program of how, why, and when to have eight basic conversations with your partner that can result in a lifetime of love. Eight Dates is written for any serious couple, and its dates are structured around the concepts of trust, dealing with conflict, sex and intimacy,…


Book cover of The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills -- and Leave a Positive Impression!

Brian Smith Author Of Individual Influence: Find the I in Team

From my list on books for a wandering eclectic mind.

Why am I passionate about this?

My fascination with the intricate web of influence and its profound impact traces back to my immersion in literature. Through the immersive experience of reading, we embark on a journey into the minds of others, expanding our understanding and evolving our individual perspectives. My professional trajectory has been shaped by a relentless pursuit of understanding the dynamics of influence across people, processes, and technology. Coupled with experiences spanning all seven continents and interactions with tens of thousands of individuals, I've undergone a transformative journey. Yet, it's the collective success of individuals embracing their humanity, both independently and collaboratively within their spheres of influence, that fuels my passion for continual growth and improvement.

Brian's book list on books for a wandering eclectic mind

Brian Smith Why did Brian love this book?

For more than 20 years, we've endorsed this book to both our team members and clients. Effective communication lies at the heart of relationships, and possessing the ability to communicate adeptly in any setting is invaluable.

This book equips readers with essential tools to navigate various social scenarios and overcome inherent anxieties and insecurities, particularly exacerbated by the prevalence of non-verbal communication channels like texting and email.

Whether grappling with speaking or engaging in conversations across diverse situations, this book is an indispensable resource for anyone seeking to enhance their communication skills.

By Debra Fine,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Fine Art of Small Talk as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 12, 13, 14, and 15.

What is this book about?

In this bestselling guide to social success, communication expert Debra Fine reveals the techniques and strategies anyone can use to make small talk in any situation.

Does striking up a conversation with a stranger make your stomach do flip-flops? Do you spend time hiding out in the bathroom at social gatherings? Do you dread the very thought of networking? Is scrolling your phone a crutch to avoid interacting?

Help is on the way with The Fine Art of Small Talk, the classic guide that's now revised for the modern era. Small talk is more than just chitchat; it's a valuable…


Book cover of Strong Towns: A Bottom-Up Revolution to Rebuild American Prosperity
Book cover of Happy City: Transforming Our Lives Through Urban Design
Book cover of Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community

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