The most recommended self reliance books

Who picked these books? Meet our 33 experts.

33 authors created a book list connected to self reliance, and here are their favorite self reliance books.
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Book cover of The Resilient Gardener: Food Production and Self-Reliance in Uncertain Times

Anna Hess Author Of The Ultimate Guide to Soil

From my list on for beyond-organic gardeners.

Why am I passionate about this?

If I'm honest, I became a gardener because I like getting dirty. Beatrix Potter's The Tale of Tom Kitten is the story of my childhood (and my adulthood too, only now I don't have to pretend I'm going to stay clean). Of course, high-quality soil leads to high-quality produce, and I deeply adore the flavors of strawberries growing in deep, dark soil. Biting into a juicy, homegrown tomato still warm from the summer sun is bliss.

Anna's book list on for beyond-organic gardeners

Anna Hess Why did Anna love this book?

I have a love/hate relationship with permaculture. I adore the concept...and when I put most authors' assertions into practice, I find that I get a much lower yield than doing things the old way. That's why I enjoy books like this one from gardeners who walk the walk, not just talk the talk. Warning: You will be sorely tempted to buy ducks. Resist, resist!

By Carol Deppe,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Resilient Gardener as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Scientist/gardener Carol Deppe combines her passion for organic gardening with newly emerging scientific information from many fields - resilience science, climatology, climate change, ecology, anthropology, paleontology, sustainable agriculture, nutrition, health, and medicine. In the last half of The Resilient Gardener, Deppe extends and illustrates these principles with detailed information about growing and using five key crops: potatoes, corn, beans, squash, and eggs.

In this book you'll learn how to:

*Garden in an era of unpredictable weather and climate change

*Grow, store, and use more of your own staple crops

*Garden efficiently and comfortably (even if you have a bad back)…


Book cover of The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives

Thomas Lickona Author Of How to Raise Kind Kids: And Get Respect, Gratitude, and a Happier Family in the Bargain

From my list on raising good children.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a developmental psychologist and former professor of education. My life’s work and 10 books have focused on helping families and schools foster good character in kids. Educating for Character: How Our Schools Can Teach Respect and Responsibility is credited with helping launch the national character education movement. My first book for parents, Raising Good Children, described how to guide kids through the stages of moral development from birth through adulthood. My focus these days is kindness and its supporting virtues. My wife Judith and I have two grown sons and 15 grandchildren, and with William Boudreau, MD, co-authored Sex, Love, and You: Making the Right Decision, a book for teens.

Thomas' book list on raising good children

Thomas Lickona Why did Thomas love this book?

This thought-provoking book by Bill Stixrud (a clinical neuropsychologist) and Ned Johnson (an SAT tutor) pops up on other “best books” lists on parenting. It deserves to be there. But it’s not, as the title might suggest, a prescription for “hands-off” parenting. On the contrary, it shows us how to actively help our kids become better decision-makers by giving them lots of guided practice in making decisions they’re capable of handling, such as: “Should I take on the challenge of moving to the next grade in school, or spend another year learning the important skills I didn’t learn very well this year?” (but definitely not decisions where, for example, danger is involved—like going to an unsupervised party).

In short, raising a “self-driven” child means doing more of a different kind of parenting—in a collaborative, mutually respectful relationship that’s more rewarding for both parent and child. It means looking for opportunities…

By William Stixrud, Ned Johnson,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked The Self-Driven Child as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"Instead of trusting kids with choices . . . many parents insist on micromanaging everything from homework to friendships. For these parents, Stixrud and Johnson have a simple message: Stop." -NPR

"This humane, thoughtful book turns the latest brain science into valuable practical advice for parents." -Paul Tough, New York Times bestselling author of How Children Succeed

A few years ago, Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson started noticing the same problem from different angles: Even high-performing kids were coming to them acutely stressed and lacking motivation. Many complained they had no control over their lives. Some stumbled in high school…


Book cover of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee: Raising Self-Reliant Children

Mark E. Crawford Author Of When Two Become Three: Nurturing Your Marriage After Baby Arrives

From my list on growing great kids and maintaining a great marriage.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve been a clinical psychologist for over thirty years, a husband for thirty years, and a father for twenty-seven years. Being the best husband and father that I can possibly be is my highest priority. I sincerely believe that healthy families are the building blocks of healthy societies. Being a good spouse and a good parent (at the same time, no less) is challenging, to say the least. However, creating a family full of love, laughter, and support during the inevitable difficult seasons of life is worthy of a lifetime of study and effort. I’m constantly looking for resources to help me and others to pursue this goal. 

Mark's book list on growing great kids and maintaining a great marriage

Mark E. Crawford Why did Mark love this book?

This book is one of the first to point out the pitfalls of “helicopter parenting,” even before the term became widely known. Wendy was one of the first people to point out that as a culture, we were starting to become far too over-protective as parents and how this robs kids of the experiences necessary to become resilient and resourceful. As a psychologist, I was seeing the same trend, and this book was extremely validating and empowering as I worked to help parents see that “hovering” and smoothing every bump in the road was actually counter-productive. This book has been around for a while, but it is still as relevant as when it was first published. 

By Wendy Mogel,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Blessing of a Skinned Knee as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

New York Times bestselling author and host of the podcast Nurture vs Nurture Dr. Wendy Mogel offers an inspiring roadmap for raising self-reliant, ethical, and compassionate children.

In the trenches of a typical day, every parent encounters a child afflicted with ingratitude and entitlement. Parents want so badly to raise self-disciplined, appreciative, and resourceful children who are not spoiled. But how to accomplish this feat? The answer has eluded the best-intentioned individuals who overprotect, overindulge, and overschedule their children's lives.

Sharing stories of everyday parenting problems and examining them through the lens of the Torah, the Talmud, and important Jewish…


Book cover of The Same Stuff as Stars

Lisa Lewis Tyre Author Of Hope in the Holler

From my list on to help kids build empathy for those in need.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am the author of two middle grade books, and I love writing about kids who may not have much materially but abound in heart and courage. I grew up in a small southern town and my childhood was just like that—low on income but full of love, hope, and friendship. I want kids to know that despite their circumstances there is hope for a better life. Like Wavie’s mom tells her in my book, Hope In The Holler, “You’ve got as much right to a good life as anybody. So go find it!”

Lisa's book list on to help kids build empathy for those in need

Lisa Lewis Tyre Why did Lisa love this book?

Life is tough for Angel—her dad is in jail, her mom is irresponsible, and she has to take care of her seven-year-old brother. Paterson doesn’t hold back in this unflinching look at family brokenness, but as sad as the circumstances are, there is hope! Angel meets some new adults and through their small kindnesses, she learns that she is stronger than she ever knew. It’s a great message for any kid who is struggling with too much responsibility. It has a redemption arc that I also loved. 

By Katherine Paterson,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Same Stuff as Stars as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 10, 11, and 12.

What is this book about?

Angel's dad is in jail and her mum's abandoned her and her little brother at their great-grandmother's crumbling farmhouse. Grandma can't even look after herself, let alone two children, so Angel finds that it's left up to her. In a dreary and lonely world there is only one bright spot - a mysterious stranger who appears on clear nights to teach Angel all about the stars. Katherine Paterson is an internationally acclaimed author who has won the Newbery Medal (twice), the National Book Award for Children's Literature (USA) twice, and the prestigious Hans Christian Andersen Award.


Book cover of The Paper Bag Princess

Virginia Mendez Author Of Childhood Unlimited: Parenting Beyond the Gender Bias

From my list on challenging gender stereotypes with your children.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am Virginia Mendez, mother of 2 and author of 2 children’s books and a parenting book about the topic of gender equality from childhood. My day job is in Diversity and Inclusion Consulting, and I train companies and schools on how to bring more gender equality into their organisations. I wasn’t always a feminist, but I was by the time I was pregnant with my first child, and it made me determined to make the world a more fair place for everyone. Everyone. 

Virginia's book list on challenging gender stereotypes with your children

Virginia Mendez Why did Virginia love this book?

This is a fantastic story with a strong female role model that reverts a lot of the classic princess stories.

It is a fabulous story about a brave and wonderful girl who refuses to be defined by her wardrobe or to whose idea of “living happily ever after” is much more than marrying a prince.

Fun and a great conversation starter!

By Robert Munsch, Michael Martchenko (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked The Paper Bag Princess as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Over five million copies in print!

When the fiercest dragon in the whole world smashes Princess Elizabeth's castle, burns all her clothes, and captures her fiance, Prince Ronald, Elizabeth takes matters into her own hands. With her wits alone and nothing but a paper bag to wear, the princess challenges the dragon to show his strength in the hopes of saving the prince. But is it worth all that trouble?

Readers the world-over have fallen in love with this classic story of girl power. Now a newly designed Classic Munsch edition will introduce the tale to a new generation of…


Book cover of My Side of the Mountain

Margaret Dulaney Author Of Whippoorwill Willingly

From my list on healing power of nature.

Why am I passionate about this?

I have been writing for the past 21 years on mystical themes with a good dose of Mother Earth Love tossed in. Fifteen years ago, I launched the spoken word website, offering one ten-minute recorded essay monthly on mystical/philosophical themes. Having published three nonfiction books, I decided to take my love of nature and interest in mysticism and write a novel for young philosophers and Earth-loving elders. My book follows the mystical journey of a rather practical eleven-year-old to an enchanted lake in the high Alps. It contains gentle animals, wise trees, kindred spirits, and healing waters.

Margaret's book list on healing power of nature

Margaret Dulaney Why did Margaret love this book?

This book is the story of a boy who runs away from his chaotic but loving home in New York City to try his hand at living in the wilderness of upstate New York.

I found it totally charming and instructive. He hollows out a tree to make himself a comfortable place to observe and embrace the Winter on the side of a mountain. This book is written more for child philosophers than Earth-Loving elders, but I read it to my husband, and we both enjoyed it greatly.

It is a different take on mother nature love than the others I have recommended, yet it still shines.

By Jean Craighead George,

Why should I read it?

9 authors picked My Side of the Mountain as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 8, 9, 10, and 11.

What is this book about?

"Should appeal to all rugged individualists who dream of escape to the forest."-The New York Times Book Review

Sam Gribley is terribly unhappy living in New York City with his family, so he runs away to the Catskill Mountains to live in the woods-all by himself. With only a penknife, a ball of cord, forty dollars, and some flint and steel, he intends to survive on his own. Sam learns about courage, danger, and independence during his year in the wilderness, a year that changes his life forever.

"An extraordinary book . . . It will be read year after…


Book cover of Teacup

Kao Kalia Yang Author Of From the Tops of the Trees

From my list on learning about refugees.

Why am I passionate about this?

I was born in a refugee camp in Thailand. I lived there until I was six. I was a child from America’s Secret War in Laos, a child who knew very little of the outside world before my family sought refuge in America. Much of my life’s work has been devoted to a search for peace, to understand the forces that put families in situations like mine. I have published widely on the topic, written of it in books for both adults and children.

Kao's book list on learning about refugees

Kao Kalia Yang Why did Kao love this book?

In the space where our fears and our hopes live, there is the landscape of our dreams and nightmares. This book lushly carries a boy's search for home to readers everywhere. It's a magical book for it carries a great deal of room for the reader to step into the words and images within. 

By Rebecca Young, Matt Ottley (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Teacup as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 4, 5, 6, and 7.

What is this book about?

A stunning picture book that addresses life’s big journeys with hope, beauty, and reassurance

School Library Journal [STARRED REVIEW!]  
“[A] moving, allegorical tale… inspiring reflection and empathy”
 
Kirkus Reviews [STARRED REVIEW!] 
“A potent discussion starter… Enchanting, beautiful, and full of hope. “
 
Booklist [STARRED REVIEW!]  
“A lyrical tale of leaving home and finding a new one…Thought-provoking and arrestingly beautiful.”

A boy must leave his home and find another. He brings with him a teacup full of earth from the place where he grew up, and sets off to sea. Some days, the journey is peaceful, and the skies are cloudless…


Book cover of The Scaffold Effect: Raising Resilient, Self-Reliant, and Secure Kids in an Age of Anxiety

Mark E. Crawford Author Of When Two Become Three: Nurturing Your Marriage After Baby Arrives

From my list on growing great kids and maintaining a great marriage.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’ve been a clinical psychologist for over thirty years, a husband for thirty years, and a father for twenty-seven years. Being the best husband and father that I can possibly be is my highest priority. I sincerely believe that healthy families are the building blocks of healthy societies. Being a good spouse and a good parent (at the same time, no less) is challenging, to say the least. However, creating a family full of love, laughter, and support during the inevitable difficult seasons of life is worthy of a lifetime of study and effort. I’m constantly looking for resources to help me and others to pursue this goal. 

Mark's book list on growing great kids and maintaining a great marriage

Mark E. Crawford Why did Mark love this book?

Anxiety is the most common mental health issue among children and adolescents. In fact, estimates are as high as one in five people under the age of eighteen years is likely to suffer from an anxiety disorder. This book provides a framework for parents to help them to provide the support kids need to navigate the journey from childhood to adulthood in a way that encourages the development of confidence and character as they move toward that day when they leave the nest and venture out on their own. 

By Harold S. Koplewicz,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Scaffold Effect as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

'A master synthesizer of attachment science, medical practice, and his own experience as a father, Harold Koplewicz capably and compassionately leads us through the art of scaffolding, from early childhood through the important adolescent period.' - Daniel J. Siegel, MD, author of The Whole Brain Child

Prevent and counteract the general anxiety and emotional fragility prevalent in children and teenagers today - a new parenting philosophy and strategies that give children the tools to flourish on their own.

Just as sturdy scaffolding is necessary when erecting a building and will come down when the structure grows stable, good parenting provides…


Book cover of Achtung Baby: An American Mom on the German Art of Raising Self-Reliant Children

Linda Åkeson McGurk Author Of There's No Such Thing as Bad Weather: A Scandinavian Mom's Secrets for Raising Healthy, Resilient, and Confident Kids (from Friluftsliv to Hygge)

From my list on parenting secrets from other cultures.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a Swedish American journalist, blogger, and author whose writings about Scandinavian parenting culture have appeared in newspapers, magazines, and online publications across the world, including Time.com, Parents.com, and Green Child Magazine. I’m particularly interested in the role of nature in childhood and believe the best memories are created outside, while jumping in puddles, digging in dirt, catching bugs and climbing trees. In 2013, I started the blog Rain or Shine Mamma to inspire other parents and caregivers to get outside with their children every day, regardless of the weather. I’m currently working on my second book, about the Nordic outdoor tradition friluftsliv, which will be published by Tarcher Perigee in 2022.

Linda's book list on parenting secrets from other cultures

Linda Åkeson McGurk Why did Linda love this book?

Preschoolers who wield knives and start fires? Kids riding by themselves on the subway? Welcome to Germany, where “free range parenting” is the norm and free play takes priority over academic learning in the early years. Zaske’s journey as an American mom in Berlin is a fascinating and thought-provoking read that turns many of our preconceived notions about German culture and parenting on their head. Parents looking to raise confident, self-reliant children will likely take Zaske’s book to heart. 

By Sara Zaske,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Achtung Baby as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

An entertaining, enlightening look at the art of raising self-reliant, independent children based on one Mum's experiences in Germany.

'Warm and companionable . . . I closed Achtung Baby feeling more relaxed and confident. While both my kids were up a tree.' - Helen Brown, Daily Mail

When Sara Zaske moved from Oregon to Berlin with her husband and toddler, she was surprised to discover that German parents give their children a great deal of freedom. In Berlin, kids walk to school by themselves, ride the subway alone, cut food with sharp knives and even play with fire. German parents…


Book cover of The Resilient Gardener: Food Production and Self-Reliance in Uncertain Times
Book cover of The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives
Book cover of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee: Raising Self-Reliant Children

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