The Self-Driven Child

By William Stixrud, Ned Johnson,

Book cover of The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives

Book description

"Instead of trusting kids with choices . . . many parents insist on micromanaging everything from homework to friendships. For these parents, Stixrud and Johnson have a simple message: Stop." -NPR

"This humane, thoughtful book turns the latest brain science into valuable practical advice for parents." -Paul Tough, New York…

When you buy books, we may earn a commission that helps keep our lights on (or join the rebellion as a member).

Why read it?

3 authors picked The Self-Driven Child as one of their favorite books. Why do they recommend it?

This thought-provoking book by Bill Stixrud (a clinical neuropsychologist) and Ned Johnson (an SAT tutor) pops up on other “best books” lists on parenting. It deserves to be there. But it’s not, as the title might suggest, a prescription for “hands-off” parenting. On the contrary, it shows us how to actively help our kids become better decision-makers by giving them lots of guided practice in making decisions they’re capable of handling, such as: “Should I take on the challenge of moving to the next grade in school, or spend another year learning the important skills I didn’t learn very well…

From Thomas' list on raising good children.

As a scientist, I’m a believer in good research and data. This book draws from the literature on how kids develop that elusive “internal motivation” (hint: by having some feeling of autonomy) and how parents with the best of intentions can inhibit this by over-managing kids’ academic pursuits. Of the myriad power struggles parents tend to get entangled in with their kids, the battle over homework and grades is one of the most common. This book specifically addresses this issue and helps parents scope out and see the wisdom in helping kids from an early age to own this process…

If you choose just one parenting book to read all year, make it this one! Just as The Gardener and The Carpenter recommends a more relaxed approach to raising young children (see above), The Self-Driven Child explores in great detail how letting go a little (or a lot) can benefit your older child.

Stixrud, a clinical neuropsychologist, and Johnson, an SAT tutor to teens in high-pressure environments, have decades of experience working with stressed out, underperforming, or highly driven teens and tweens. They sagely remind us that in order to develop properly, children need a sense of autonomy and control…

From Brittany's list on finding your bliss as a parent.

If you love The Self-Driven Child...

Ad

Book cover of The Curiosity Cycle: Preparing Your Child for the Ongoing Technological Explosion

The Curiosity Cycle By Jonathan Mugan,

The Curiosity Cycle is a book for parents and educators who want to teach their children to be active explorers of the world. Learning through curiosity leads to adaptive thinking because your child is continually trying to improve his or her understanding of the world, and new facts and ideas…

Want books like The Self-Driven Child?

Our community of 12,000+ authors has personally recommended 100 books like The Self-Driven Child.

Browse books like The Self-Driven Child

Book cover of How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
Book cover of A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy
Book cover of Minimalism for Families: Practical Minimalist Living Strategies to Simplify Your Home and Life

Share your top 3 reads of 2024!

And get a beautiful page showing off your 3 favorite reads.

1,586

readers submitted
so far, will you?

Ad

📚 If you like The Self-Driven Child, you might also like...

Book cover of Me and The Times: My wild ride from elevator operator to New York Times editor, columnist, and change agent (1967-97)

Me and The Times By Robert W. Stock,

Me and The Times offers a fresh perspective on those pre-internet days when the Sunday sections of The New York Times shaped the country’s political and cultural conversation. Starting in 1967, Robert Stock edited seven of those sections over 30 years, innovating and troublemaking all the way.

His memoir is…

Book cover of Kanazawa

Kanazawa By David Joiner,

Emmitt’s plans collapse when his wife, Mirai, suddenly backs out of purchasing their dream home. Disappointed, he’s surprised to discover her subtle pursuit of a life and career in Tokyo.

In his search for a meaningful life in Japan, and after quitting his job, he finds himself helping his mother-in-law…

5 book lists we think you will like!

Interested in parenting, stress management, and self reliance?

Parenting 388 books
Self Reliance 19 books