100 books like I'll Show Myself Out

By Jessi Klein,

Here are 100 books that I'll Show Myself Out fans have personally recommended if you like I'll Show Myself Out. Shepherd is a community of 10,000+ authors and super readers sharing their favorite books with the world.

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Book cover of The School for Good Mothers

Julie Ma Author Of Love Letters

From my list on diverse characters as main characters, not just stereotypes or sidekicks.

Why am I passionate about this?

If I were a supermarket pie, my label would say, ‘Made in the UK with Chinese ingredients.’ Born in Wales to parents from Guangzhou and Hong Kong, my Cantonese is appalling, I’m bad at maths, and I can barely ride a bike without falling off. In short, I am an example of a real-life person and not a cliché or stereotype from the sorts of books we used to have to read if we wanted to see diverse characters. It’s about time the stories we read and the shows we watch become so effortlessly diverse that we don’t even notice. I hope my novels are playing a part in making that commonplace.

Julie's book list on diverse characters as main characters, not just stereotypes or sidekicks

Julie Ma Why did Julie love this book?

This book is a fine example of where we are now in the depiction of diversity in fiction where the main character, Frida Liu, is Chinese-American, and although we have references to her parents and her immigrant upbringing, it is not really what this book is about.

Not usually one for speculative fiction, I found myself mesmerised by this tale of how a fictional authoritarian state dictates who and what makes for a good mother. 

Leaving your wife with your tiny baby while you run off with your mistress? Fine.

Being a frazzled, deserted working mother who inadvertently leaves her baby alone for two hours? Not fine and punishable by a stay in the school for good mothers where you are forced to practise motherhood on an AI robot doll in the hope that maybe you can be good enough to mother your own child again. 

By Jessamine Chan,

Why should I read it?

6 authors picked The School for Good Mothers as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

THE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
AN OBAMA'S 2022 SUMMER READING PICK

'A taut and propulsive take on the cult of motherhood and the notion of what makes a good mother. Destined to be feminist classic - it kept me up at night' PANDORA SYKES
'A haunting tale of identity and motherhood - as devastating as it is imaginative' AFUA HIRSCH
'Incredibly clever, funny and pertinent to the world we're living in at the moment' DAISY JOHNSON

'We have your daughter'

Frida Liu is a struggling mother. She remembers taking Harriet from her cot and changing her nappy. She remembers…


Book cover of Essential Labor: Mothering as Social Change

Olga Mecking Author Of Niksen: Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing

From my list on that will change the way you think about parenting.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a writer, journalist, and occasional translator. Originally from Poland, I now live in the Netherlands with my German husband and three multilingual children. Since my children were born, I’ve become fascinated by the various ways culture and society affect the way we raise our children. I have written about various topics, but mostly parenting for The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, The Guardian, and the BBC, among others. When not writing or thinking about writing, I can be found reading books, drinking tea, and doing nothing.

Olga's book list on that will change the way you think about parenting

Olga Mecking Why did Olga love this book?

Mothers often feel discouraged and undervalued, but what if we expanded the definition of what mothering actually means? What if caregiving, in all its forms, wasn’t just an afterthought but the most important work humans can do? Through combining research and personal stories, Angela Garbes is making a passionate plea for recognizing the value of caregiving in our society.

I’ve had read too many parenting guides that put the responsibility for how their children turned out on the parents. Angela Garbes’s book is different. It’s thought-provoking, well-researched, and beautifully written. Garbes is absolutely right: to make a better life for children, we need societies that care for everyone.

By Angela Garbes,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Essential Labor as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

NATIONAL BESTSELLER

From the acclaimed author of Like a Mother comes a reflection on the state of caregiving in America, and an exploration of mothering as a means of social change.

The Covid-19 pandemic shed fresh light on a long-overlooked truth: mothering is among the only essential work humans do. In response to the increasing weight placed on mothers and caregivers—and the lack of a social safety net to support them—writer Angela Garbes found herself pondering a vital question: How, under our current circumstances that leave us lonely, exhausted, and financially strained, might we demand more from American family life?…


Book cover of Love, Money, and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids

Olga Mecking Author Of Niksen: Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing

From my list on that will change the way you think about parenting.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a writer, journalist, and occasional translator. Originally from Poland, I now live in the Netherlands with my German husband and three multilingual children. Since my children were born, I’ve become fascinated by the various ways culture and society affect the way we raise our children. I have written about various topics, but mostly parenting for The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, The Guardian, and the BBC, among others. When not writing or thinking about writing, I can be found reading books, drinking tea, and doing nothing.

Olga's book list on that will change the way you think about parenting

Olga Mecking Why did Olga love this book?

Have you ever really wondered why Dutch parents are so calm and don’t push academics so much? Is it because of some secret special technique that they use? Nope. It’s because cultures that value cooperation over competition like the Netherlands – feel less pressure for their children to excel in school. Turns out the secret to good parenting is having a good social support system. 

I like books about parenting that are counter-intuitive and this one, while more academic than the other ones on the list, is no exception. I have picked it because it proves that parents, like all humans act under economic, financial, and social constraints—a fact that gets easily ignored.

By Matthias Doepke, Fabrizio Zilibotti,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Love, Money, and Parenting as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

An international and historical look at how parenting choices change in the face of economic inequality

Parents everywhere want their children to be happy and do well. Yet how parents seek to achieve this ambition varies enormously. For instance, American and Chinese parents are increasingly authoritative and authoritarian, whereas Scandinavian parents tend to be more permissive. Why? Love, Money, and Parenting investigates how economic forces and growing inequality shape how parents raise their children. From medieval times to the present, and from the United States, the United Kingdom, Germany, Italy, Spain, and Sweden to China and Japan, Matthias Doepke and…


Book cover of Motherwhelmed: Challenging Norms, Untangling Truths, and Restoring Our Worth to the World

Olga Mecking Author Of Niksen: Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing

From my list on that will change the way you think about parenting.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a writer, journalist, and occasional translator. Originally from Poland, I now live in the Netherlands with my German husband and three multilingual children. Since my children were born, I’ve become fascinated by the various ways culture and society affect the way we raise our children. I have written about various topics, but mostly parenting for The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, The Guardian, and the BBC, among others. When not writing or thinking about writing, I can be found reading books, drinking tea, and doing nothing.

Olga's book list on that will change the way you think about parenting

Olga Mecking Why did Olga love this book?

Do you think that you’re failing as a mother? That you’re not doing enough, or doing too much, or doing all the wrong things? Do you always have the feeling that you should enjoy parenting more and beat yourself up if you can’t? Mostly, do you believe that it’s your fault? 

Guess what, it’s not you, it’s the culture. A culture that doesn’t support parents. That expects everything of them without giving anything back in return. 

But there is a way out of this mess and it starts with re-writing your story.

I have chosen this book because of its radical message that mothers are not just worthy of support but that they can also change the world. That they’re tired and exhausted and overwhelmed but also strong and smart and powerful. 

By Beth Berry,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Motherwhelmed as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Today’s mothers are struggling; though, it's not for the reasons most moms tend to think. We’ve been conditioned to believe our inadequacy is the reason we can’t seem to “keep up” or enjoy mothering more, but nothing could be further from the truth.

We aren’t failing as mothers. We’re mothering within a culture that is misleading and inadequately supporting us.

Motherwhelmed is a deep, yet lighthearted exploration of the messy frontier of modern-day motherhood we’re all struggling to navigate. With compassion, realness, and rich storytelling, Beth Berry:

• Illuminates the mindsets and narratives keeping us feeling overwhelmed, disempowered, anxious, isolated,…


Book cover of Attachment: The Fundamental Questions

Jay Belsky Author Of The Origins of You: How Childhood Shapes Later Life

From my list on development from childhood to middle age.

Why am I passionate about this?

It was almost by accident that I became who I turned out to be as a professional, a developmental scientist interested in how early-life experiences shape who we become. Had someone asked me when I graduated from high school what were the chances of me becoming a scientist and teacher, I would have answered “zero, zero”! During my now 40+ year academic career I've come to appreciate how complex the many forces are that shape who we become. There's no nature without nurture and no nurture without nature. This emergent realization led me to learn about and study many aspects of developmental experience, like parenting and peer relations, and the role of genetics and evolution.

Jay's book list on development from childhood to middle age

Jay Belsky Why did Jay love this book?

How parenting—and other factorsshape infant-parent attachment security/insecurity and the effects of attachment on child, adolescent, and adult development has been the subject of extensive study for more than 4 decades.

This edited volume takes stock of what developmental scholars have learned as well as what challenges to attachment theory and research remain to be addressed. The contributors to this edited volume are all well-recognized experts in the field.

By Ross A. Thompson (editor), Jeffry A. Simpson (editor), Lisa J. Berlin (editor)

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Attachment as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The ongoing growth of attachment research has given rise to new perspectives on classic theoretical questions as well as fruitful new debates. This unique book identifies nine central questions facing the field and invites leading authorities to address them in 46 succinct chapters. Multiple perspectives are presented on what constitutes an attachment relationship, the best ways to measure attachment security, how internal working models operate, the importance of early attachment relationships for later behavior, challenges in cross-cultural research, how attachment-based interventions work, and more. The concluding chapter by the editors delineates points of convergence and divergence among the contributions and…


Book cover of Death in Venice

Rob Samborn Author Of The Prisoner of Paradise

From my list on historical fiction set in Venice, Italy.

Why am I passionate about this?

As an author of a dual-timeline thriller series set in Venice in the present-day and 16th century, I’ve spent countless hours researching the world’s most mesmerizing city. I’ve been there three times, including on a research trip. I’ve worked with historians and experts on various aspects and have explored the ancient streets and buildings first-hand. I’ve also read dozens of books set in Venice.

Rob's book list on historical fiction set in Venice, Italy

Rob Samborn Why did Rob love this book?

There are so many amazing books set in Venice, but no list is complete without Thomas Mann's Death in Venice. It’s a literary classic from 1912 that not only stands the test of time, it exceeds the hype. Death in Venice follows Gustav von Aschenbach, a famous author who travels to Venice in search of inspiration. Instead, he finds obsession. Death in Venice is erotic and dark, but what I love most about this book is how it captures the city’s bewitching personality. 

By Thomas Mann, Stanley Appelbaum (translator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Death in Venice as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

One of the most famous literary works of the 20th century, the novella "Death in Venice" embodies themes that preoccupied Thomas Mann (1875–1955) in much of his work; the duality of art and life, the presence of death and disintegration in the midst of existence, the connection between love and suffering, and the conflict between the artist and his inner self. Mann's handling of these concerns in this story of a middle-aged German writer, torn by his passion for a Polish youth met on holiday in Venice, resulted in a work of great psychological intensity and tragic power. It is…


Book cover of The Middle Passage: From Misery to Meaning in Mid-Life

Nicos Hadjicostis Author Of Destination Earth: A New Philosophy of Travel by a World-Traveler

From my list on to help guide you through your midlife crisis.

Why am I passionate about this?

I’m a writer and world-traveler. But in my previous life, I was a media executive. At thirty-five years old, at the height of my career in that world, I felt an emptiness – a lack of meaning in my life. I decided to quit and retreat to a family country house in order to figure out my next steps. I soon realized that I was experiencing a full-blown midlife crisis and started reading a lot of books in order to understand my predicament. I ended up reading for four years before finally deciding to travel around the world. The following books are the ones that helped me the most; I recommend them to others who are entering this crucial period of life.

Nicos' book list on to help guide you through your midlife crisis

Nicos Hadjicostis Why did Nicos love this book?

This is the best book ever written about the midlife crisis. Although only 117 pages long, it is dense with meaning, and multiple readings are necessary to truly get the most out of it. Hollis is a Zurich-trained Jungian analyst whose thought is permeated by Jung’s theories. His writing is very beautiful and often literary. He draws from psychology, poetry, art, his own practical experience, and much more. Hollis elucidates the difference between a job and a vocation, explains the relationship between fear and growth, shows how solitude differs from loneliness, and above all, gives us the best map to transmute midlife misery into meaning. Hollis’s understanding of the human condition is astonishing.

By James Hollis,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Middle Passage as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Author James Hollis' eloquent reading provides the listener with an accessible and yet profound understanding of a universal condition - or what is commonly referred to as the mid-life crisis. The book shows how we may travel this Middle Passage consciously, thereby rendering our lives more meaningful and the second half of life immeasurably richer.


Book cover of Life Reimagined: The Science, Art, and Opportunity of Midlife

Dorothy Littell Greco Author Of Marriage in the Middle: Embracing Midlife Surprises, Challenges, and Joys

From my list on helping you to thrive in midlife.

Why am I passionate about this?

I've been writing and providing pastor care for more than thirty years now. Since turning sixty, I have noticed that aging well is not a given. Many people seem to grow increasingly bitter, resentful, and hard. If we want to become more empathetic, grateful, and loving, we have to keep growing and do our spiritual and relational work. We also need trustworthy guides to help us find our way. I hope to be a wise, compassionate guide for my readers.

Dorothy's book list on helping you to thrive in midlife

Dorothy Littell Greco Why did Dorothy love this book?

Hagerty is a meticulous reporter and deftly weaves personal stories with many facts and figures about midlife. She interviews experts in sociology, psychology, neurobiology, and genetics while exploring the question, "How do you thrive in midlife?" Hagerty argues that rather than seeing midlife as a time of crises, we should be able to experience it as a time of renewal: a time when we feel a growing sense of certainty about who we are and what we have to offer the world.

By Barbara Bradley Hagerty,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Life Reimagined as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A dynamic and inspiring exploration of the new science that is redrawing the future for people in their forties, fifties, and sixties for the better-and for good.

There's no such thing as an inevitable midlife crisis, Barbara Bradley Hagerty writes in this provocative, hopeful book. It's a myth, an illusion. New scientific research explodes the fable that midlife is a time when things start to go downhill for everybody. In fact, midlife can be a great new adventure, when you can embrace fresh possibilities, purposes, and pleasures. In Life Reimagined, Hagerty explains that midlife is about renewal: It's the time…


Book cover of The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50

Dave Liu Author Of The Way of the Wall Street Warrior: Conquer the Corporate Game Using Tips, Tricks, and Smartcuts

From my list on hacking your career that aren’t boring.

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a 30-year veteran who has achieved success in three industries: Wall Street, Silicon Valley, and Hollywood. I rose to the top of Wall Street, arguably one of the most grueling professional work environments in the world. I want to share the tips that helped me reach financial success with anyone who feels disadvantaged in the corporate game (i.e., women, people of color). My book leans heavily on research into cognitive biases and human nature, but focuses almost exclusively on actionable ideas. It is high on practical, often offbeat, tactics with an emphasis on gamesmanship, and is accessible to any reader, working at any job, due to its humorous, irreverent, satirical tone.

Dave's book list on hacking your career that aren’t boring

Dave Liu Why did Dave love this book?

The Happiness Curve is a fabulous exploration of the science of happiness, its natural highs and lows, and how individuals can navigate the midlife slump to find greater satisfaction and purpose in life.

This is a book that will help put everything into perspective. It will help you figure out what makes people happy and why that changes over time. By learning its secrets, perhaps you can find happiness too!

By Jonathan Rauch,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Happiness Curve as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"In this warm, wise, and witty overview, Jonathan Rauch combines evidence and experience to show his fellow adults that the best is yet to come.” ―Steven Pinker, bestselling author of Enlightenment Now

This book will change your life by showing you how life changes.

Why does happiness get harder in your 40s? Why do you feel in a slump when you’re successful? Where does this malaise come from? And, most importantly, will it ever end?

Drawing on cutting-edge research, award-winning journalist Jonathan Rauch answers all these questions. He shows that from our 20s into our 40s, happiness follows a U-shaped…


Book cover of The Development of the Person: The Minnesota Study of Risk and Adaptation from Birth to Adulthood

Jay Belsky Author Of The Origins of You: How Childhood Shapes Later Life

From my list on development from childhood to middle age.

Why am I passionate about this?

It was almost by accident that I became who I turned out to be as a professional, a developmental scientist interested in how early-life experiences shape who we become. Had someone asked me when I graduated from high school what were the chances of me becoming a scientist and teacher, I would have answered “zero, zero”! During my now 40+ year academic career I've come to appreciate how complex the many forces are that shape who we become. There's no nature without nurture and no nurture without nature. This emergent realization led me to learn about and study many aspects of developmental experience, like parenting and peer relations, and the role of genetics and evolution.

Jay's book list on development from childhood to middle age

Jay Belsky Why did Jay love this book?

This book tells the story of the ground-breaking Minnesota Longitudinal Study, the first to document developmental effects of infant-mother attachment security/insecurity and so much more, a contribution to understanding that greatly shaped my own career.

The book shares discoveries which emerged in following more than 200 children growing up under high-risk conditions from birth to adulthood. In so doing it illuminates whether, how, and why early-life experiences foster problematic development or resilience in the face of adversity.

By L. Alan Sroufe, Byron Egeland, Elizabeth A. Carlson , W. Andrew Collins

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Development of the Person as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The definitive work on a groundbreaking study, this essential volume provides a coherent picture of the complexity of development from birth to adulthood. Explicated are both the methodology of the Minnesota study and its far-reaching contributions to understanding how we become who we are. The book marshals a vast body of data on the ways in which individuals' strengths and vulnerabilities are shaped by myriad influences, including early experiences, family and peer relationships throughout childhood and adolescence, variations in child characteristics and abilities, and socioeconomic conditions. Implications for clinical intervention and prevention are also addressed. Rigorously documented and clearly presented,…


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