The best adolescence books

Okay, this one isn’t scary. But This One Summer is an awesome coming-of-age GN about two young girls who spend a fateful summer at a lake house. While the themes of family dysfunction and the onset of sexual understanding make this skew a little older, the Tamakis really capture the details of not just summer, summer crushes, and summer communities, but also friendship and tween girls in general. Funnily enough, the two of us always hated summer – as kids, we spent them indoors with equal parts air conditioning, books, TV, and for Susan, cats. (Umm, and it hasn’t really changed that much since then.)

Nine Stories, along with Franny and Zooey provides a wonderful glimpse into the lives of several members, mostly siblings, of the Glass Family. It is the first collection of short stories I ever read (I was in high school) and I devoured it in one weekend. I remember being so impressed with how each story had its own distinct emotion and personality. It wholly inspired me and was a great influence on my current novel. It taught me something that my favorite TV shows like The Brady Bunch and The Cosby Show couldn’t—that no family is absolutely perfect. That often times there is a simmering tension beneath the skin of every family and that tension can lead to profound sadness and sometimes tragedy.   

On the surface, this is a coming-of-age story with a protagonist similar to many others in the genre—bright, witty, snobbish, and pissed off at almost everybody he meets. But what makes this book so good is the narrator’s intelligence and self-awareness, and the complexity of all the characters and their relationships. 

My own upbringing was a far cry from the wealthy, highly-cultured world depicted here—I grew up in a tiny town in southern Iowa, and though there was a college in town I had little access to culture—yet I could completely relate to the gay narrator’s fish-out-of-water feeling and his desire to be understood. I also loved his close relationship with his grandmother, since my grandmother was equally important to me.    

Jay points out that the decade of the twenties, once regarded as the core of young adult life, has become for many a kind of extended adolescence - or an early retirement. The skills, knowledge, habits, and talents which would ordinarily be developed during this time are put off for a later that may prove too late. She makes the case for treating the decade seriously - while still having fun and laying the groundwork for yet more enjoyment later on in life.

This book was a total breath of fresh air when it was published by psychologist Lisa Damour in 2016. Dr. Damour really ‘gets’ girls and her understanding of the sometimes erratic and confusing behaviour in the adolescent years is profound and compassionate. Dr. Damour also writes beautifully so it’s a pleasure to read and doesn’t repeat the same old tired cliches. Instead, it goes to the next level to explain what's going on for girls as they grow up and become independent. It prepares parents for what's to come and lets them know when it's time to worry and when girls are going through a necessary development phase.

“Haven’t you grown!“ is often a grown-up’s exclamation of delight in a teen’s growth spurt, but rarely do we see this from the teen’s view. It can be scary as well as exciting seeing your body change so rapidly, and I love McCullers description of Frankie’s worry that she will continue to grow at the current pace; then she will be a “freak” – a word that is likely to resonate with all adolescents. Frankie's private, unspoken fears taken place in the midst of a quintessentially social celebration and remind us how often teens, even when surrounded by joy and support, struggle with self doubt as to who they are and how they look.

When I read this book as a young teen I admired the freedom the young characters had to be absorbed in their own worlds, and, as a result, constantly getting into scrapes and suffered scolding. Much later I re-read this and was struck by the comic magic of Tom and his friends, assumed to have died, returning to witness their own funeral. Here the boys who were constantly found wanting are now being praised without reservation. This reveals the see-saw action of the adolescent self: one moment teens see themselves as wonderful, beloved, treasured, and at another cast down, and always they carry around an “imaginary self” where they cannot escape concern about how people see them. 

What happens after a child finishes Montessori preschool?

That was the question for my own children. I was able to take the Montessori 6-12 training in order to keep up with them, but parents and teachers can learn a lot about this age here. Dr. Montessori examines the educational concerns of the older child, the adolescence, and even the university student. She considers each level on its own because human beings have different needs at different ages. She explores ways to support the physical, mental, social, and psychological needs of each age. It is in this book that we learn about the Erdkinder, or Farm School, where the need for real work, independence, and related research, and work-based academic study is being provided in several countries today.

My friend and fellow novelist, Allison Pittman, recommended this one to me.

It’s a story told in letters written between a goofball kid named Joey and a New York Giants player named Charlie. I laughed and cried my way through this winner of a novel, rooting for both Joey and Charlie the entire time. It’s a story about the love of baseball, yes.

But it’s also a book about ambition and friendship, heartache and dreams, disappointments and hope. And with every page I read, I fell more and more in love with baseball. It’s one of the finest novels I’ve read.

It’s been nearly ten years since I first read this book and I can still remember what the characters were wearing in the first chapter. Now that’s visceral storytelling! The author’s ability to capture his intense obsession with his future wife is familiar, poignant, and heart-warming. Yglesias’ portrayal of the couple’s long and, at times, bumpy marriage, makes this one of the most complex and honest portrayals of a marriage that I have ever read. That this is also a book about cancer and death does nothing to diminish the feelings of hope and gratitude embodied on every page. 

Shirley Jackson’s gothic American novels imbued with an eerie sense of the uncanny. Hangsaman is a campus novel about the mysterious disappearance of a freshman student—from the pen of a woman who herself was an academic’s wife at a liberal art’s college at Bennington, where Paula Welden was an American college student who ostensibly disappeared in December 1946 Vermont's Long Trail hiking route. The book is a misty, creepy read and if you research Jackson’s real life, you begin to wonder what is she really telling us?

In this novel in verse, Elizabeth Acevedo beautifully evokes the landscape and feel of Harlem through the observant character of Xiomara Batista.

Having lived in upper Manhattan for years, I recognized the neighborhood in the vibrant descriptions. I identified with Xiomara’s need to express herself, how she fills the pages of her notebook with what she feels she can’t speak aloud. Her emotions as she confronts the challenges of friendship, romance, and family feel very real.

When a high school teacher opens up for her the world of spoken word poetry and a whole new set of possibilities for self-expression, I find myself rooting for Xiomara to be brave and take the steps she must take on her personal and artistic journey towards sharing her voice.

I discovered this book decades ago while sitting in the waiting room of a doctor’s office. I was there to teach yoga to the medical staff. The doctors were running late so I picked up one of the books on the table …aha! The Missing Piece! And it was just what I needed too. Although written for children, adults can also enjoy the simple yet profound lessons within. An easy read that will keep you and your children coming back to read over and over again. All these many years later, I still turn to it often for inspiration. Thanks Docs!

I wasn’t sure how an entire book could be written on the topic of reading to my kids. I also thought I knew how to read to my kids. This book took our time together to a new level! The Read-Aloud Family challenged me to make the most of our reading time, equipped me to ask the right questions, and created an incredibly precious space in our days to share together in the delight of stories! Our Read-Aloud time is now my favorite time of the day. This book encouraged me that “Ten minutes matters.” If all I have is ten minutes, it’s worth it to pick up a book and read with my kids. Quickly, that ten minutes turned into one hour a day. This book also includes a very helpful resource guide with lists of suggested reading for each age group.

Middle school gets a bad rap.

It’s synonymous with petty gossip and nervous insecurity—a time that many adults would rather forget. But as author Chris Balme shows, middle school can also be magical. By taking us into the adolescent brain, Finding the Magic in Middle School helps parents and teachers understand the challenges—and the potential—unique to these oft-maligned years.

Some books are pretty straightforward: this is one of them. I like it because it covers a lot of ground and includes lots of diverse kids. Sometimes you want a sweet story, and sometimes you want something more practical. I love that this book gives concrete examples about being brave, strong, and resilient. My son has autism, and when he was small he preferred concept books to stories. This would have been perfect for him—as he took things very literally. It’s a best-seller and comes in a Spanish version.

In this collection of poems and short prose pieces, Young People’s Poet Laureate (2019-21) Naomi Shihab Nye, takes inspiration from honeybees to encourage us to refresh our spirits by honing our attention and treating others with kindness. While many of the poems concern the nature and wonder of bees and the threats they face, other pieces address subjects as diverse as crickets, egrets, kiwi cake. The poet does not shy away from the heftier subjects of war and injustice because she knows young people are hungry to discuss those things, too. This is a perfect collection to draw from to inspire students in a writing class. I know because I have used her poems in that way. Some of my favorite poems are in this collection.

Love is a word that not many of us understand, but Buscaglia explains it so well. When people use the word "love," they express their understanding of love at that moment. There is no universal definition of love. Sometimes teens don’t know if they love themselves because it is not tangible. This book helps them know that they are worthy of that love. Love changed my life when I was in high school. It helped me understand myself and influenced my life purpose: to be kind and in solidarity with people. When I work with teens, they often feel untethered by not having, and not knowing, their purpose. In my book, I teach how important a goal is to feel good about yourself, and setting one is much simpler than you think it is! It helps motivate them to get over their anxiety.

While it’s generally agreed that our teens are going through a tougher time, I think that if we give them the skills to understand their own thinking they can ultimately come through this period stronger and more resilient. What’s more, we can’t just tell them how their minds work. They have to understand it for themselves. So that’s why I love this book which compresses the science for teens and gives them a ready-to-use tool kit for everything from handling worries to feeling better about their bodies.

Girlhood was published while I was in edits and though I bought the book, I couldn’t risk reading it. The subject matter was too close to my own. What if I wanted to add or (gasp) rewrite? I’m glad I waited. Febos’ stunning essays perfectly encapsulate the confusion of adolescent girlhood, the mixed messages—from adults, from our own bodies—and the traps that lay in wait.My favorite, “The Mirror Test,” contains lines that crackle such as: “Before it carried any sexual connotation, the word slut was a term for a slovenly woman… A slut was a careless girl, hands sunk haphazardly into the dough…—eyes cast out the window, mouth humming a song, always thinking of something else. Oh was I ever a messy child. A real slut in the making.”