Here are 100 books that That Kind of Mother fans have personally recommended if you like
That Kind of Mother.
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As a mom of three who's struggled to find a balance between parenting, career, and meeting my own needs, I'm intensely interested in the way our society views motherhood. There are so many different ways to become a mother and so many different opinions about what makes a “good mom.” On the one hand, our culture has incredibly high expectations and seems to judge women no matter what choices they make. At the same time, we don’t offer struggling moms basic supports like low-cost childcare, mental health benefits, or paid maternity leave. I love reading novels that recognize this paradox and take a generous view of the many definitions of motherhood.
At first glance, this doesn't seem to be a book about motherhood, but Vanderah beautifully illustrates how the word “mother” can be more of a verb than a noun. I raced through this story, captivated by the precocious child character, Ursa, and rooting for the accidental guardians who try to protect her. The questions surrounding Ursa’s sudden appearance quickly drew me in, but then the book became so much more than a mystery.
Joanna, the main character, has no biological children but very much becomes a mother to Ursa in the story. I loved the organic, natural way their relationship develops and how they each teach the other to love and trust again. The sweet, inspiring ending made me want to read all of Vanderah’s books.
An Amazon Charts, Wall Street Journal, and Washington Post bestseller, and a Goodreads Choice Award finalist.
In this gorgeously stunning debut, a mysterious child teaches two strangers how to love and trust again.
After the loss of her mother and her own battle with breast cancer, Joanna Teale returns to her graduate research on nesting birds in rural Illinois, determined to prove that her recent hardships have not broken her. She throws herself into her work from dusk to dawn, until her solitary routine is disrupted by the appearance of a mysterious child who shows up at her cabin barefoot…
As a mom of three who's struggled to find a balance between parenting, career, and meeting my own needs, I'm intensely interested in the way our society views motherhood. There are so many different ways to become a mother and so many different opinions about what makes a “good mom.” On the one hand, our culture has incredibly high expectations and seems to judge women no matter what choices they make. At the same time, we don’t offer struggling moms basic supports like low-cost childcare, mental health benefits, or paid maternity leave. I love reading novels that recognize this paradox and take a generous view of the many definitions of motherhood.
I read this book during a camping trip with my family, and I got so sucked into the story that I kept sneaking off to read in the tent (which seems appropriate, given the plot). We’ve all read stories about husbands and fathers who hide secret second families, but in this case, it’s a mother who is secretly married to two different men.
The story illustrates how mothers are human and flawed like everyone else, and it made me reflect on all the ways our culture expects women to sacrifice for their families. I found myself questioning what we mothers owe to our children versus what we owe to ourselves.
Lore Rivera was married to two men at once. She led a secret double life - until one man shot the other. That's the story the world knows.
But true-crime writer Cassie Bowman wants to know more - about the mysterious woman at the heart of it all, and about what really happened the night of that tragic murder. How did Lore lead two lives? How did it feel when it all came crashing down?
After years of hiding, Lore is finally ready to tell her story. But as her tragic tale unfolds, will either woman be ready for the…
As a mom of three who's struggled to find a balance between parenting, career, and meeting my own needs, I'm intensely interested in the way our society views motherhood. There are so many different ways to become a mother and so many different opinions about what makes a “good mom.” On the one hand, our culture has incredibly high expectations and seems to judge women no matter what choices they make. At the same time, we don’t offer struggling moms basic supports like low-cost childcare, mental health benefits, or paid maternity leave. I love reading novels that recognize this paradox and take a generous view of the many definitions of motherhood.
This book made me laugh and cry in equal measure. Laurie Frankel writes about motherhood and families with such wit, charm, and frankness that I always feel like I’m being invited right into her characters’ lives, being asked to pull up a chair at their kitchen table.
Through multiple perspectives and dual timelines, the story dives deep into the question of whether it’s genetics or dedication or love—or some complicated mix of all three—that makes someone a mother. I loved Frankel’s expansive perspective on the meaning of family, and the way she offers examples of biological moms, adoptive moms, and moms making unexpected choices, but all doing their best.
India Allwood grew up wanting to be an actress. Armed with a stack of index cards (which, torn into pieces, also function as make-shift confetti) and a hell of a lot of talent, she goes from awkward 16-year-old to Broadway ingenue to tv star.
But while promoting her most recent project, a film about adoption, India does what you should never do - she tells a journalist the truth: it's a bad movie. Like so many movies about adoption, it tells only one story, a tragic one. But India's an adoptive mum herself and knows there's so much more to…
As a mom of three who's struggled to find a balance between parenting, career, and meeting my own needs, I'm intensely interested in the way our society views motherhood. There are so many different ways to become a mother and so many different opinions about what makes a “good mom.” On the one hand, our culture has incredibly high expectations and seems to judge women no matter what choices they make. At the same time, we don’t offer struggling moms basic supports like low-cost childcare, mental health benefits, or paid maternity leave. I love reading novels that recognize this paradox and take a generous view of the many definitions of motherhood.
I couldn’t put this one down! I kept asking myself what I would have done if I was in the same situation as Sarah, who found herself accidentally kidnapping a child to protect her from an abusive mom. The story made me think deeply about whether biology or bonding should matter more when deciding who deserves to raise a child.
I love it when authors aren’t afraid to dive into the perspective of unlikeable characters, and I appreciated that Frey gives us chapters from the perspective of the biological mom, whose misery and overwhelm I found relatable even as her parenting choices made me cringe.
Emma Grace Townsend. Five years old. Gray eyes. Brown hair. Missing since June.
Emma Townsend is lonely. Living with her cruel mother and clueless father, Emma retreats into her own world of quiet and solitude.
Sarah Walker. Successful entrepreneur. Broken-hearted. Abandoned by her mother. Kidnapper.
Sarah has never seen a girl so precious as the gray-eyed child in a crowded airport terminal - and when a second-chance encounter with Emma presents itself, Sarah takes her, far away from home. But if it's to rescue a little girl from her damaging mother, is kidnapping wrong?
Motherhood blindsided me. I was 37 and living my childhood career dream as a foreign correspondent when I serendipitously smelled the head of a friend’s newborn. Next thing I knew, I was up all night singing old Beatles' songs to a baby who needed to eat every half hour. Amazed by the power of rudimentary biology to reshape my conscious experience, I couldn’t help but start writing about it, first in essays and then in two shameless motherhood books of my own: The Mommy Brain: How Motherhood Makes You Smarter (heavily inspired by SarahHrdy) and Buzz: A Year of Paying Attention (about sharing an ADHD diagnosis with my son).
Beginning in 1970, with “Up the Sandbox,” Roiphe was part of the first wave of shameless motherly truth-tellers. There are few more truer sentences than her acknowledgment that “feminism, despite its vast accomplishments, has not cured me of motherhood” in this poignant and prescient book about the impossible expectations that continue to bedevil working mothers.
The author of the best-selling novel Up the Sandbox offers a critical account of the feminist stance on marriage and motherhood, arguing for renewed support for the needs of working women trying to bring up children. 40,000 first printing. Tour.
I don’t just write stories, I study them. I’ve noticed that nearly every major hero/ine’s journey and epic tale has an adoption component. From Bible stories and Greek myths (adoption worked out well for Moses, not so much for Oedipus) to Star Wars through This Is Us, we humans are obsessed with origin stories. And it’s no wonder: “Where do I come from?” and “Where do I belong?” are questions that confound and comfort us from the time we are tiny until we take our final breath. As an adoptive mother and advocate for continuing contact with birth families, I love stories about adoption, because no two are alike. They give us light and insight into how families are created and what it means to be a family—by blood, by love, and sometimes, the combination of the two.
Deciding to place a child for adoption is one of the most excruciating decisions in the human experience. When Amy Seek, a promising architecture student, becomes pregnant, she’s not yet ready to become a parent. But she’s also not ready, completely, to hand over her child to a perfectly lovely family. Her tale of love, heartbreak, and acceptance is a reminder to parents and non-parents of all circumstances that there are lots of ways to make a family—and in this case, it was the best, most perfectly imperfect option. I think this is a really important book for everyone in the adoption triad (birth parents, adoptive parents, adoptees) to read, because it really gets up close and uncomfortably personal with the struggle some birth mothers undergo, despite the unlimited love they have for their babies.
God and Jetfire is a mother's account of her decision to surrender her son in an open adoption and of their relationship over the twelve years that follow. Facing an unplanned pregnancy at twenty-two, Amy Seek and her ex-boyfriend begin an exhaustive search for a family to raise their child. They sift through hundreds of "Dear Birth Mother" letters, craft an extensive questionnaire, and interview numerous potential couples. Despite the immutability of the surrender, it does little to diminish Seek's newfound feelings of motherhood. Once an ambitious architecture student, she struggles to reconcile her sadness with the hope that she's…
I came to writing later in life – at age forty-two. Writing was something I had always wanted to do. Still, it wasn’t until I experienced something that was in some ways extraordinary and in some ways prevalent–the inadequate treatment of maternal mental health and maternal health in general–that I felt my story had to be told. While maternal mental illnesses are expected, there is a shortage of books on the topic. When I was deep inside my illness, I searched for any story that might mirror my own and had difficulty finding one. With this list, I hope to help anyone who needs a hand to reach out to.
I picked this book up at 3 o’clock on a Saturday afternoon and didn’t put it down until I finished the last page at 1 o’clock on a Sunday morning.
This unique thriller explores what happens when you don’t become the mother you expected to be and struggle to connect with your child. It is all at once brilliant, nuanced, and propulsive.
Audrain lays bare the complexities of the nature of maternal love, generational trauma, and skirting the fine line between sanity and madness.
A Good Morning America Book Club Pick | A New York Times bestseller!
"Utterly addictive." -Paula Hawkins, author of The Girl on the Train
"Hooks you from the very first page and will have you racing to get to the end."-Good Morning America
A tense, page-turning psychological drama about the making and breaking of a family-and a woman whose experience of motherhood is nothing at all what she hoped for-and everything she feared
Blythe Connor is determined that she will be the warm, comforting mother to her new baby Violet that she herself never had.
Becoming a mother rocked my world in countless ways, drawing me to books that explore the raw, unfiltered truth about how challenging motherhood can be. The complexities—the love, guilt, and frustration—resonate deeply with me. Motherhood is also why I started writing; initially, I wanted to process the overwhelming emotions I was feeling. When I began sharing my writing with friends, their “Yeah, me too's” made me realize I wasn’t alone. I have deep respect for authors who can capture the messiness of motherhood so honestly, and I’m inspired by their ability to put into words what so many of us experience.
I loved this book'sraw, unflinching exploration of a taboo topic: the quiet regret some mothers carry. Through Sadie, a fierce Broadway star and feminist icon, and her daughter Jude, an actress on the brink of her own fame, Reimer paints a portrait that's complex and so intimate it’s almost uncomfortable at times.
I appreciated how neither woman was cast as the villain, and in their struggle, I found I could relate to both of them at different moments. Cleverly structured as a play in six acts, this novel is a beautifully written, compulsive read that asks the hard question: can a woman truly be both a devoted mother and a devoted artist?
Set against the sparkling backdrop of the theater world, this propulsive debut follows the relationship between an actress who refuses to abandon her career and the daughter she chooses to abandon instead.
Sadie Jones, a larger-than-life actress and controversial feminist, never wanted to be a mother. No one feels this more deeply than Jude, the daughter Sadie left behind. While Jude spent her childhood touring with her father’s Shakespearian theater company, desperate for validation from the mother she barely knew, Sadie catapulted to fame on the wings of The Mother Act—a scathing one-woman show about motherhood.
Like many women my age, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the possibly discordant relationship between the things I love doing—writing, reading, spending time in solitude with stories and ideas—and the expectation of motherhood. For many of us, the prospect of parenthood can feel less like a choice than a cultural imperative, and it can be difficult to reconcile brain and body, self and society. The novels on this list feature razor-sharp, highly educated female protagonists who experience, recall, or imagine pregnancy and motherhood in complicated ways. Their minds and bodies are sometimes in sync, sometimes painfully at odds, but always fascinating to behold.
Heti’s heady, meditative, heavily autobiographical novel documents its narrator’s personal ambivalence about the idea of motherhood.
While this is not a conventional novel with a linear plot, it is a gorgeously written reflection on what motherhood means, or could mean, in general and to our narrator in particular. With unflinching honesty, she explores not only the question of whether or not she wants a child of her own, but also her identity as her mother’s child and her position as a descendant of Holocaust survivors.
I found so much to relate to in these pages; I often set out to underline a sentence and ended up underlining an entire page, feeling like Heti had put her finger on something I’d experienced but had never articulated so well.
'A response - finally - to the new norms of femininity' Rachel Cusk
Having reached an age when most of her peers are asking themselves when they will become mothers, Heti's narrator considers, with the same urgency, whether she will do so at all. Over the course of several years, under the influence of her partner, body, family, friends, mysticism and chance, she struggles to make a moral and meaningful choice.
In a compellingly direct mode that straddles the forms of the novel and the essay, Motherhood raises radical and essential questions about womanhood, parenthood, and how - and for…
Parenting books bore me. I don’t like reading instruction manuals, and don’t have time to weigh others’ opinions about how to raise my kids. But when I read books about motherhood forged in self-reflection and told with literary elegance, I become a more self-reflective parent and have the eyes to see beauty in my ordinary maternal experiences. Books like this are few and far between. It’s hard for mothers to make art; when our resources are spread thin in parenthood, why do work that may not pay? How to find time for creative rumination? But here’s a list of books written by mothers who persisted in their creative work to show us motherhood in all of its mundanity, mania, and magic.
I found it almost impossible to find time for self-reflection in early parenthood. I was consumed at all times by the urgent needs of the infant and toddler in my care. But when I read Motherhood: A Confession, I became self-reflective by proxy.
Using Saint Augustine’s Confessions as a literary companion, Natalie Carnes asks, What if one of the greatest texts about human nature were written not by a man but by a woman and a mother? Using the self-awareness that is a hallmark of Augustine’s memoir, Carnes shows us maternal love and its shadow side, inviting us to see, from the eyes of women, both the dark and luminous shades of the human condition.
A meditation on the conversions, betrayals, and divine revelations of motherhood.
What if Augustine's Confessions had been written not by a man, but by a mother? How might her tales of desire, temptation, and transformation differ from his? In this memoir, Natalie Carnes describes giving birth to a daughter and beginning a story of conversion strikingly unlike Augustine's-even as his journey becomes a surprising companion to her own.
The challenges Carnes recounts will be familiar to many parents. She wonders what and how much she should ask her daughter to suffer in resisting racism, patriarchy, and injustice. She wrestles with…
