100 books like Everything's Trash, But It's Okay

As a new inductee to midlife, I was excited to read the funny tales of this book. As I age, I feel like a new member of a club that I didn’t necessarily want to be a part of. I didn’t mean to register or apply, but here I am. The author of this book would certainly commiserate because here she is, too.

We are both navigating what it’s like to be in a body that’s older in years than we feel. Likewise, we understand what it means to have a new generation become the louder voice in the room. Navigating aging is a wild ride, and it’s nice to have bedfellows as messy as me punching tickets for the seat next to me.

If nothing else, we can swap stories about creaking knees and complain about gas prices until we reach our destination. I love the humor and naked… show more.

I loved this book so very much because it’s honest, raw, and so funny. I think that most of us can agree that life is both beautiful and brutal. It’s okay to admit that even the best of times can be rife with bullshit. The events leading up to some of my best memories were disastrous. The author gets that and unabashedly tells her embarrassing, uncomfortable, cringe-worthy, tragic stories.

I felt seen and in good company when reading it. Here’s the thing: I relished cackling over the stories of Ellis and her people because they felt familiar—they felt like my people. Ellis is the funny one in her friend group. I am the funny one in mine. I feel she and I could get into some real trouble together. Even better? We could co-write a killer essay in the aftermath. 

Okay, the author of this book is Generation X. Though I am an elder millennial, thereby not allowed in the elite ranks of the generation before me, I absolutely love this book. From the very jump, with a reference to one of my all-time favorite movies, Reality Bites, I was sucked in.

This author readily admits to being a white-hot mess with little hope of ever being a true expert on anything. Same, girl. Same. It is so refreshing to read someone else’s story that feels true to my own. Our situations, circumstances, and specific happenings are so different, but the common thread of sheer messiness runs true through both of our lives.

When I’m running late to school car line, swearing at the punk student driver in front of me, dreading my kid’s piano lessons, I don’t need to read another manual from a have-it-all perfect Pinterest mom.… show more.

I realize I have said this before (probably in this list), but there are not enough words to describe how much I adore this book. I will die on the hill that has me saying, “Ali Wong is the very best at all things funny.” I am obsessed with the sardonic tone, matter-of-fact truths, and the hilarity throughout the tome written for the comedian’s daughters.

I love how the book covers all the need to know from start to finish about being a woman, being someone you like, being a working mom, and, well, just being. Wong tells it like it is in letters to her girls and, in the process, lets the rest of us know, too. The book is undeniably funny, which is a must for me, but I like that it is also vulnerable in places. I learned lessons, tore up, and felt empowered in equal parts… show more.

If you seriously care about racial healing, you have to read this book. White people are so damn afraid to say the wrong thing or to offend anyone when it comes to the topic of race, that we end up not saying anything at all. And silence is death to a movement. If you care about Black and Brown lives, then this book will shake you up in a good way, and remind you of the importance of being a good listener to the concerns of people of color. When you listen, you can have empathy. When you have empathy, you can start to be a part of the racial reckoning and healing that’s starting to take place in our nation.

Levenstein’s subtitle says it all: we generally don’t think there was a ‘90s feminism. Her book pairs especially well with the others on this list, because it demonstrates how women of color took the lead in an intersectional feminism that focused on a huge range of issues at the end of the 20th century. It’s also a great read about the role of the early internet in 1990s feminist organizing. If you think social media was the first time computer technology shaped grassroots activism, her chapter on technology alone will blow your mind.

When I pick up a Courtney Milan historical romance, I know I will be hit in the heart with a story that is as insightful as it is moving.

The only question was which of her books to include in this list!

I chose The Duke Who Didn’t because it explores class, race, and gender roles in the delightful setting of a small town in the English countryside hosting an annual sports festival.

The plot reckons with the aristocrat’s responsibility to his people, the challenges and joys of a working-class community, and the exploitation of non-British identities for profit.

And because it is a Courtney Milan novel, it does so with plenty of clever tropes and swoon-worthy romance!

Bottici is another such friend at first reading, another partisan of the Spinozan current, but one deeply immersed in the feminist thought that Colson regrettably ignores. Hers is a fully intersectional feminism, attending especially to the margins of society, where its freaks and pariahs live. Like Colson, she offers opportunities for difficult thinking that reward us with new vistas, new possibilities for life.

Cooper details the unique experiences that Black women have when feeling and expressing their anger.

I found this not only an indispensable resource for expanding my understanding of intersectional feminism but also an indispensable examination of the ways that white women like myself exacerbate the challenges faced by Cooper and other Black women.

A collection of very short but incredibly interesting and illuminating essays, this book inaugurated the field of study we might call “feminism and empire.” Strobel and Chaudhuri gathered up the most important histories written to that date that explained how nineteenth and twentieth-century feminism emerged from colonialist contexts all over the world. Asking the question “what difference does gender make?” each author teases out the importance of gender for colonial travel and politics in Asia, Africa, and the Americas. Reading this book made me want to contribute to that kind of historical understanding of gender, modeling for me what an “intersectional feminist” method of historical investigation might look like.