I founded the All-Weather Friend, which is about helping friends get through difficult situations. My first book, Alzheimer’s: A Crash Course for Friends and Relatives, tells how to help people living with dementia. I’ve had hard times in my life—my husband’s brain tumor and suicide, my father’s dementia, infertility, miscarriage, my brother’s sudden death, and other things that flooded me with grief. But my life is filled with joy; I’ve learned that joy comes from God and from a compassionate connection with friends and people we love. I write and speak about “informed compassion.” I hope you’ll visit my website, where there’s a great dementia resource page with contributions by many readers.
Reading this book is like sitting in on a support
group. It’s a collection of quotes about living with dementia from people who
are doing just that.
I love it for churches starting a memory ministry because
these quotes could be quickly read aloud in worship services, as a “ministry
moment,” or read round-robin style in groups beginning to learn about dementia.
I like the collection of many voices speaking out candidly and poignantly about
this difficult journey.
Betsy Peterson spent fourteen years caring for her husband who was suffering from dementia, an experience that put her in touch with others inside the struggle to have or to care for someone with the disease. A combination of contributions from patients, their families, friends, and caregivers, Voices of Alzheimer's gathers the poignant stories, funny quotes, and priceless encouragement that Peterson heard and that helped her along the way. Capturing the many dimensions of the Alzheimer experience-the challenges, the struggles, the humour, and even the rewards-a Voices presents a varied, and realistic, look at what it's like to be affected…
I have always had a thirst for mystery and puzzle-solving, which has expanded into books as I've grown. For me, emotions play an important role in any tale. Suspense novels that bring a personal element allow the puzzle to unfold meaningfully. Like slotting the last piece of a jigsaw in place, I want to feel their emotions—the fear that makes their hearts pump in rapid beats. Their sorrow and happiness. I want to know I have been on a journey when I finish. And one, I didn’t travel alone. I hope you, too, go on a journey with the books I have recommended.
While this may not be classed as a suspense novel, it is just that for me. It is a brutal, honest, and heartbreaking story that lived on long after I finished reading it. Touching on dementia and Down Syndrome, the author weaves a magic web of true understanding and heartfelt emotions.
Irene's strength, sense of responsibility, family, and love for her husband, Sam, make this a beautiful read. For Irene, it isn’t only about coming to terms with the loss of her sister, Rose, but finding out what happened the night that Rose died… and the truth is very different from what Irene thinks she saw.
Mother and daughter tied together by shame and secrecy, love and hate.
I wait by the bed. I move into her line of vision and it’s as though we’re watching one another, my mother and me; two women – trapped.
Today has been a long time coming. Irene sits at her mother's side waiting for the right moment, for the point at which she will know she is doing the right thing by Rose.
Rose was Irene's little sister, an unwanted embarrassment to their mother Lilian but a treasure to Irene. Rose died thirty years ago, when she was eight,…
I have been teaching college students about aging since I was in my late 20s. The audacity! Now that I am officially in the “young-old” category I used to describe to my students, I more fully appreciate the social constructions of aging that affect elders, the medical conditions that can derail plans for “a good old age,” and the challenges we all face in attempting to live with meaning and purpose as we grow older. In addition to teaching, writing about, and researching various aspects of aging, especially aging with various type of dementia, my work has addressed the positive and negative ways religious faith can shape how people cope with aging.
Rabbi Dayle Friedman’s wisdom about aging can be appreciated by people of all religions and no religion. Her honest engagement with some of the most difficult issues aging persons face leaves readers with hope rather than despair. Her many years as a chaplain for people living in long-term care with dementia undergird her suggestions on how to make sense of what she calls “dementia’s brokenness”. She concludes each chapter with a spiritual practice readers can employ to engage more deeply with the chapter’s topics, and also at the end of each chapter, she offers readers a blessing for their own efforts to flourish as they age.
Growing Older Can Be a Time of Growing in Depth and Wisdom
"My sense is that the whole journey beyond midlife is a mysterious blend of light and dark, wholeness and fragility…. We have a chance beyond midlife to become the person we were truly meant to be. We can draw on everything we have experienced so far to contribute to the people around us and the wider world, and to find strength and resilience amid the challenges." ―from the Introduction
Whether you are fifty-five or seventy-five, approaching retirement or age one hundred, growing older brings remarkable opportunities but often…
Like the Bach sisters in my novel Things We Do For Love, my sisters and I have cared for our mother, who battles Alzheimer's. Witnessing her transformation from a vibrant powerhouse to someone resembling the Walking Dead has been heart-wrenching. Despite the emotional rollercoaster, this journey has deeply connected us with our mother. Delving into the depths of her being has been a privilege, offering profound insights into her true essence. This challenging experience has unfolded as a disguised blessing. In this journey, we've discovered the beauty of unconditional love that binds our family together. It reflects the central question of my novel: What truly makes a happy family?
The moment I started reading this book, its tone gripped me instantly.
It fearlessly presents challenging and daunting situations with a mix of wit and courage. Darkly observant, the story unfolds with a blend of humour, fondness, and a hint of irony, making "The Leisure Seeker" a bittersweet fable of the golden years.
The book fearlessly confronts the realities and indignities of aging and disease, yet it doesn't fail to celebrate life, embracing every precious moment left in the lives of the characters, even if they are old geezers.
While the subject matter could lead to a somber narrative, the book takes an unexpected turn, becoming a genuinely life-affirming and highly entertaining tale, defying the omnipresent shadow of mortality.
This is the unforgettable cross country journey of a runaway couple in their twilight years determined to meet the end of all roads on their own terms. "The Leisure Seeker" is the story of John and Ella Robina, a couple married 50+ years - she has stopped her cancer treatments, he has Alzheimer's - who kidnap themselves from the adult children and the doctors who seem to run their lives, and steal off on a forbidden vacation. Each battling their own infirmities, John pilots their '78 Leisure Seeker RV (it's the one with the left turn signal blinking) along the…
I inhabit the past. You may find me lurking in my four-hundred-year-old Devon cottage, or spot me thinly disguised as the formidable Mistress Agnes, a good wife of a certain age who leads a somewhat chaotic life during the mid-seventeenth century. I write, I read, I research, I share my passion, I write some more. My life revolves around reading, writing and researching history. Having spent the past forty-five years unravelling my own family’s story and loving both historical and crime novels, what could be better than a book that combines all these elements. I have to say that if genealogy was as dangerous a career as some of these books imply, no one would be advised to take it up!
Probate genealogist, Anna Ames, is given the task of researching the history of the Draycott family. As she does so, she is drawn into the lives of this dysfunctional family, who are not as conventional as they seem. Her research unfolds against a background of the warm portrayal of Anna’s own family life with her husband, who has early-onset dementia, her teenage children, her poetry-loving father, and Bobble the dog.
Anna Ames is not pleased to be asked by her boss to write a profile of a wealthy local family instead of continuing with her usual probate research but the conventional, dull-seeming Draycott family turn out to be seething with secrets. As she discovers more about each one she is at first amused and then alarmed and finally horrified and saddened as she realises the true nature of her task. But when her own family are drawn into a scenario of crime and violence that she had never suspected existed on the streets of Birmingham and the quiet fields and…
I am the ultimate dilettante. I consume huge amounts of history, literature, and current events. I am not interested in dumbing down what I write. I am endlessly curious and assume my readers are also. I started writing during the pandemic and have not quit. I have completed three novels and have been an avid reader my entire life. Join me!
I loved the imagination and inner thoughts of the dying protagonist.
I believe the central question Harding wants the reader to contemplate is: what is our reality–our past and memories we carry, or is it just the physical place at that one moment in time? I think the author makes a convincing case that we are so much more than we appear.
An old man lies dying. Confined to bed in his living room, he sees the walls around him begin to collapse, the windows come loose from their sashes, and the ceiling plaster fall off in great chunks, showering him with a lifetime of debris: newspaper clippings, old photographs, wool jackets, rusty tools, and the mangled brass works of antique clocks. Soon, the clouds from the sky above plummet down on top of him, followed by the stars, till the black night covers him like a shroud. He is hallucinating, in death throes from cancer and kidney failure.
The
Three Graces is set in Tuscany, and I could feel the sunshine on my face as I
read this sumptuous novel.
Set over just two weeks in May, with the planning of
a wedding at its heart, it embraces a huge cast of characters (young and old,
rich and poor, kind and mean) and a wide range of issues (including racism,
refugees, immigration and generation rent versus baby boomers). All of which
are woven skillfully into a delightful story.
The eponymous Three Graces are
three elderly ladies who have moved separately to Tuscany to live out their
retirement. "Between them, they had 4 breasts, 5 eyes, and 3 hip replacements." Ultimately, this is a tale of friendship.
'She's such a skilful storyteller who vividly dramatises our lives with wit, wisdom and compassion' BERNARDINE EVARISTO
'I revelled in The Three Graces - such an intriguing cast, so convincingly presented, and a narrative that continually surprises' PENELOPE LIVELY
'A brilliant piece of storytelling... it should be the book everybody's reading this summer' ANDREW O'HAGAN
'Gorgeous and generous... rich with characters and suffused with sunlight' LISSA EVANS
When Enzo shoots an illegal migrant from his bedroom one night, it triggers a series of events that embroil old and young, rich and poor, native and foreign. His elderly…
Children’s stories about memory loss, Alzheimer’s, and dementia resonate with me because I know firsthand how difficult it is to care for someone with this disease. My Aunt Luella had Alzheimer’s, and I cared for her in my home. When my aunt no longer remembered me, my heart ached. I felt hopeless, afraid. I can only imagine how difficult it is for a child to watch as a beloved grandparent forgets them. I found these five books to be helpful and inspiring. They offer hope. They embrace the love that still exists.
Ice Cream with Grandpa is about the love between a child and his Grandpa.
The child tells the story beginning with the first time his Grandpa gave him ice cream. Their love of ice cream bonds them, but they also enjoy gardening, and walks in the park. When Grandpa moves to an apartment, it took some adjustment. What helped was the ice cream parlor nearby. Grandpa eventually goes into a memory care home.
The child fears Grandpa won’t remember him. His mom explains that Grandpa is still Grandpa. They can still enjoy spending time together. On Grandpa’s last day in hospice, they eat ice cream. Grandpa passes, but the child continues to remember their love each time he eats ice cream.
This story moved me so much that I cried. I love that this book includes a Guide for Parents and Caregivers: Tips for Talking with Children about Dementia, Hospice,…
After his beloved grandpa's health declines and he receives a diagnosis of dementia, a grandson must navigate the changes in their relationship. Through it all, he learns that Grandpa is still Grandpa, and their bond deepens and sweetens through a shared love of ice cream.
Ice Cream with Grandpa is a loving, tender picture book that gently explores the topics of dementia, aging, and loss. Written from a child's point of view, it chronicles the changes in their relationship as his grandpa moves to assisted living, then memory care, and eventually hospice.
I founded the All-Weather Friend, which is about helping friends get through difficult situations. My first book, Alzheimer’s: A Crash Course for Friends and Relatives, tells how to help people living with dementia. I’ve had hard times in my life—my husband’s brain tumor and suicide, my father’s dementia, infertility, miscarriage, my brother’s sudden death, and other things that flooded me with grief. But my life is filled with joy; I’ve learned that joy comes from God and from a compassionate connection with friends and people we love. I write and speak about “informed compassion.” I hope you’ll visit my website, where there’s a great dementia resource page with contributions by many readers.
Although this book may not seem to fit the list,
it’s one of the best books on loss I have ever read, and I’ve read quite a few. Dementia is about loss, after loss, after loss. Yes, there are moments and
times of joy. And yes, it challenges and expands our love, faith, compassion,
and sense of self. But dementia is, indisputably, about loss.
I read this book
shortly after my husband’s suicide, and it comforted me at a time when comfort
was hard to come by. My Southern Baptist mother also read it and, when she
finished, held it up and said in her practical, down-to-earth way, “This is a
book I will read over and over again like I read the Bible.”
Rabbi Wolpe’s
book is beautifully written and wonderfully wise, and I recommend it to
everyone.
Some losses are so subtle they go unnoticed, some so overwhelming and cruel they seem unbearable. Coping with grief and experiencing loss overwhelms us in ways that seem both hopeless and endless. In painful moments like these, we must make a choice: Will we allow the difficulties we face to become forces of destruction in our lives, or will we find a way to begin learning from loss, transforming our suffering into a source of strength?
A theologian with the heart of a poet, Rabbi David Wolpe explores the meaning of loss, and the way we can use its inevitable…
I am a novelist, a journalist, a humanist celebrant, and coauthor with my husband of the best-selling Nicci French thrillers. Witnessing my father’s dementia and his slow-motion dying radically transformed the way I think about what it is to be human. In 2014, I founded John’s Campaign which seeks to make the care of those who are vulnerable and powerless more compassionate, and which is now a national movement in the UK. In 2016, I won the Orwell Prize for Journalism for ‘exposing Britain’s social evils' in the pieces I wrote exploring the nature of dementia.
Erwin Mortier is a poet, and this slim, intense volume is a haunting memorial to his mother in her final months. She died of early-onset dementia, and Mortier struggles to find adequate words for a condition that is profoundly connected to the failure of language and the connection of the self to the world.
'My mother, a house that is slowly collapsing, a bridge dancing to a tremor.'
It started when she could no longer remember the word for 'book'. Then her mind, her language and her identity began to slip away.
This is Erwin Mortier's moving, exquisitely observed memoir of his mother's descent into dementia, as a once-flamboyant woman who loved life and pleasure becomes a shuffling, ghostlike figure wandering through the house. Piecing together the fragments of her lost life, and his own childhood, Mortier asks: what do we become when we lose the repertoire of habits and words that make us…
