My favorite books about why work sometimes sucks and what to do about it

As a narrative inquiry researcher, I study stories of people who have experienced a shared phenomenon, such as workplace bullying, sexual assault, or a natural disaster. Almost without exception, the initial plotlines are ones of devastation.

Over the years, I have attempted to come to a deeper understanding of where the hurt resides. Cohen answers that question, documenting for the reader how our desire to be a contributing member of a community is at the center of our striving, and how the surest way to wound another is by pushing them outside the inner circle. The cruelest of all acts is to revoke someone’s belonging to their community, and more tragically, themselves.

In Cohen’s masterful book, he shares stories and details the research on why our need to belong is an essential ingredient of being human and offers the reader fruitful ways to form more meaningful connections. 

I am a voracious reader, digesting several books a week. Every once in a while, a book stops me in my tracks, charging me to yell to myself and anyone who will listen - “Yes, yes, that is it!” This is exactly how I felt when I read Janoff-Bulman’s explanation of how trauma sleeps not in the “what” of the story but in how that “what” shatters our assumptions of a benevolent world, making us question if the world is inherently good, if events are meaningful, and whether we are truly worthy.

As both a survivor and researcher of workplace abuse, bullying on the job shatters all of these assumptions - charging the target to doubt the benevolence of the workplace, the predictability of the work environment, and the innate belief that we are inherently worthy despite the workplace gossip that hijacked our narrative.

This seasoned but timeless book talks to the reader with gentleness and compassion, explaining how survivors of trauma often blame themselves for events and circumstances that are outside of their control, and how this self-incrimination eats away at the parts of us that are most beautiful. This book is both a roadmap in and out of trauma, offering an explanation of the shattering and a blueprint for rebirth. 

As a workplace bullying researcher, my bookshelves are filled with hundreds of books specifically and adjacent to the topics of workplace abuse, toxic environments, creative cultures, and destructive leadership.

Of all the books I have read on the topic, Duffy’s and Sperry’s is the best. Coming from both a research and clinical perspective, they clearly lay out the causes, significance, and often tragic fallout of workplace abuse.

In addition, they bring the concept of mobbing, a term more often used in Europe, to the United States, detailing the trauma that ensues when a group of people joins forces, exhibiting the predatory behavior of pack animals, with the shared mission to denigrate the target’s reputation and drive her out of a job.

Most importantly, after offering the reader a rich education on toxic group dynamics, they give specific strategies survivors can use to heal and eventually thrive in the workplace. 

It was my research on creativity that led me to study workplace abuse.

Surprisingly, there are remarkable similarities among targets of bullying; most salient, they tend to shake the status quo at work while exploring and offering novel solutions to institutionalized problems. Unfortunately, as Grant details in his research, instead of embracing these innovators as forecasters of the future, organizations attempt to silence and minimize their contributions.

However, creatives are not in it for the money or accolades, but for the love of the game and dedication to the mission, thus when they are forced to bow to tradition and play smaller than who they were born to be, they exit the stifling work environment, thus further stagnating an already lagging work culture.

In this book, Grant brilliantly hails the power of the creative to both change our minds and change the world, urging institutions to give them space to explore the big ideas that will revolutionize our tomorrows. 

A book on quitting may seem like a downer to end my list of recommendations, but if that is what you think, you’ve got quitting all wrong.

Quitting is not about endings, but about clearing the page so there is space to write the next story. In this thought-jostling book, Duke brings the reader into the lives of notable characters who stayed in the game too long and the high price they paid for not walking away.

Throughout her engaging narratives, she infuses research on why we hang on too long and offers reflective questions to get us out of the muck. Threaded amongst the chapters are life lessons disguised on quips like when we quit on time, it likely feels like we are giving up too early, and when it looks like a tie between sticking it out and cutting our losses, we are almost always better walking away.

Each week people email me stories of their toxic work environments, asking for advice on how to make it better. My got to answer, backed by research,  is  - “If possible, quit!.” Quitting just may be the new winning.