The best books on the power of family to shape us in ways we can’t imagine
By Maya Bernadett
Who am I?
Family is one of the few truly universal experiences that all human beings have, because we all come from somewhere. Every human on Earth is raised by someone, so it’s something we can all relate to, for good or for ill. Universal experiences like family allow us as human beings to relate to others, and that common ground is what provides joy and meaning in life. I appreciate that I don’t have to have a master’s degree or PhD in family studies or family therapy to glean insights into how our families shape us. My own observations and analytical writer’s mind made me realize the importance of storytelling in keeping families together, especially across generations.
I wrote...
Stories My Grandmother Told Me: A multicultural journey from Harlem to Tohono O'dham
By
Maya Bernadett
What is my book about?
The illuminating and deeply personal debut from Gabriela Maya Bernadett, Stories My Grandmother Told Me is the true story of Esther Small, the great-granddaughter of slaves, who became one of the few Black students to graduate from NYU in the 1940s. Having grown up in Harlem, Esther couldn’t imagine a better place to live; especially not somewhere in the American Southwest. But when she learns of a job teaching Native American children on a reservation, Esther decides to take a chance.
She soon finds herself on a train to Fort Yuma, Arizona; unaware that each year, the Bureau of Indian Affairs kidnaps the native Tohono O’odham children from the reservation and forces them to be educated in the ‘ways of the White man.’ One of two Black people in Fort Yuma, Esther feels isolated, never sure where she belongs in a community deeply divided between the White people and the Tohono O’odhams.
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The Books I Picked & Why
Holes
By
Louis Sachar
Why this book?
This is my favorite book of all time. Though a children’s book, I found this book to be wise beyond its years, and to offer insights that no book written for adults has quite been able to capture. Family curses, combining past and present, unsolved mysteries- it has everything! Most of all, it shows how family legacies can impact generations, for better or for worse. We can’t escape our families, so it is best to come to terms with where we come from and even see the good in it, rather than trying to break away from something so integral to who we are.
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Evening Is the Whole Day
By
Preeta Samarasan
Why this book?
And you thought your family was crazy! Set in Malaysia, this fascinating story combines family drama with class issues, ethnic tensions, the effects of colonial rule, and even ghosts. I love how writer Preeta Samarasan evokes a mysterious, almost magical feel to the setting and characters, as the reader gets acquainted with the wealthy, yet deeply dysfunctional family at the center of the story. No matter how bitter, enraging, or disappointing these characters feel towards each other, they are still bonded together, and the story ends on a hopeful note. This family can redeem itself-even if it takes moving to another country to do it.
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Home: How Habitat Made Us Human
By
John S. Allen
Why this book?
Family is not just a metaphor- it resides in a physical place, and that place is home. I found this book extremely valuable because it takes an anthropological approach to the meaning of home, exploring the sociological, historical, and even scientific reasons why home is so fundamental to the human condition. The image of a hearth stands out most from this book: that the most fundamental way for humans to make food - fire - created the foundation for viewing home as a place that is crucial to our nourishment and flourishing. This basic aspect of human survival led to a space of protection, peace, comfort, and security- a home. And where there is home, there is family.
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How We Live Now: Redefining Home and Family in the 21st Century
By
Bella DePaulo
Why this book?
Family can be an emotionally charged word, especially for people who come from toxic families or don’t even know their biological families. This is why I appreciate this non-fiction book by Bella DePaulo, which acknowledges that there is more than one way to be a family. She goes well beyond the typical nuclear family of mother, father, and biological children to explore how people are living together in the 21st century. One type of configuration she explores, the multi-generational household, is near and dear to my heart because I grew up like that, and it changed my life for the better.
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Mending Skins
By
Eric Gansworth
Why this book?
Family is the core of Native American identity, and nowhere is this more exemplified than in Eric Gansworth’s book Mending Skins. The book centers on two Tuscarora women, mother and daughter, and their triumphs and struggles as professional women trying to do right by their tribe. I recommend this book because it looks at the complexities of trying to keep Native families together among the backdrop of colonialism and government meddling, which was bent on destroying the Native family. Though broken, the women in this book never feel sorry for themselves, and, as the title suggests, look towards the future and ways to become whole again.