Why am I passionate about this?

My first memory is of my father telling me about the cosmos, the Big Bang, and how the sun would burn out one day, expanding so big it would swallow the Earth. This memory haunted my dreams and waking hours, instilling a fascination with the life and death cycles of everything. Now I’m an artist, writer, educator and somatic coach devoted to helping people talk about and honor the things western culture doesn’t create space for–big emotions, messy love and the gifts of dying.


I wrote...

When You Die You Will Not Be Scared to Die

By Scarlet Tunkl,

Book cover of When You Die You Will Not Be Scared to Die

What is my book about?

This artistic collection of fears about dying—and their ultimate futility in the face of the unknown—is a keepsake, a prayer…

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The books I picked & why

Book cover of No Country for Eight-Spot Butterflies: A Lyric Essay

Scarlet Tunkl Why did I love this book?

I love a book with a mix of big wonder and big sorrow. I read this book; no, I gobbled this book in one day, looking out over the Atlantic.

I cried big salty tears into the sea and laughed out loud with the ocean breeze. I learned about the untold histories of Guam and the constellation of people and experiences that make up a rich life. I felt the beauty and power of the indigenous culture of Guam and I grieved the many deaths caused by the collision of climate crises, politics and greed. 

By Julian Aguon,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked No Country for Eight-Spot Butterflies as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A Michelle Obama Reach Higher Fall 2022 reading list pick

A Library Journal "BEST BOOK OF 2022"

"Aguon's book is for everyone, but he challenges history by placing indigenous consciousness at the center of his project . . . the most tender polemic I've ever read."
-Lenika Cruz, The Atlantic

"It's clear [Aguon] poured his whole heart into this slim book . . . [his] sense of hope, fierce determination, and love for his people and culture permeates every page."
-Laura Sackton, BookRiot

Part memoir, part manifesto, Chamorro climate activist Julian Aguon's No Country for Eight-Spot Butterflies is a collection…


Book cover of Advice for Future Corpses (and Those Who Love Them): A Practical Perspective on Death and Dying

Scarlet Tunkl Why did I love this book?

The poetics of this book, mixed with its vital and necessary information about being with death, broke my heart at least once a page, often more. I believe that every time your heart breaks, you build a necessary resilience for staying alive.

By the end of the book, all the pieces of my heart had somehow been mended, leaving me with a new understanding of what being alive is about. In the months leading up to my grandmother’s death, I returned to this book many times, and it helped me give her a beautiful death in her home, just as she longed for. Every person who is going to die and loves someone who will die needs this book. 

By Sallie Tisdale,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Advice for Future Corpses (and Those Who Love Them) as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Award-winning writer and nurse Sallie Tisdale offers a lyrical, thought-provoking yet practical perspective on death and dying in this frank, direct and compassionate meditation on the inevitable.
_______________________________________

From the sublime to the ridiculous, Tisdale leads the reader through the peaks and troughs of death with a calm, wise and humorous hand. More than a how-to manual or a spiritual bible, this is a graceful compilation of honest and intimate anecdotes based on the deaths Tisdale has witnessed in her work and life, as well as stories from cultures, traditions and literature around the world.

As Tisdale explores all the…


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Book cover of Marriage and Fatherhood in the Nazi SS

Marriage and Fatherhood in the Nazi SS By Amy Carney,

When I was writing this book, several of my friends jokingly called it the Nazi baby book, with one insisting it would make a great title. Nazi Babies – admittedly, that is a catchy title, but that’s not exactly what my book is about. SS babies would be slightly more…

Book cover of The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief

Scarlet Tunkl Why did I love this book?

I was raised by a family and culture that taught me nothing about grief, mourning, or honoring the great heartbreaks of aliveness. This book raised me and taught me about the importance of ritual and community tending to our grief.

It taught me that naming the pain of the world is an act of love and that helping others do the same is a responsibility we all carry. I trained with Francis Weller years after reading this book and was so affirmed by sharing space with a person who embodies what he teaches in a deep and embodied way. 

By Francis Weller,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked The Wild Edge of Sorrow as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"It blew me away. I underlined things on nearly every page." —Anderson Cooper, All There Is

The Wild Edge of Sorrow offers hope and healing for a profoundly fractured world—and a pathway home to the brightness, pains, and gifts of being alive.

Introducing the 5 gates of grief, psychotherapist Francis Weller explores how we move through the waters of grief and loss in a culture so fundamentally detached from the needs of the soul.

• The first gate recognizes—and invites us to accept—the painful truth that everything we love, we will lose. With this acceptance comes beauty and responsibility—and an…


Book cover of Holding Space: On Loving, Dying, and Letting Go

Scarlet Tunkl Why did I love this book?

This book taught me that I don’t always have to show up “right” or “well.” I can just show up, and that is often enough–to death or any other difficult situation. I walked away from this book with the assurance that there is no way to fully prepare for death because every person is different, every death is different and grief is a bit of a trickster (you never know how it's going to show up).

The mix of personal stories and practical direction has lasted with me over the years and is now a part of how I hold space as a friend, family member, coach, spiritual guide, lover, and partner in life and death. 

By Amy Wright Glenn,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Holding Space as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A hospital chaplain reflects on grief and loss, mindfulness and healing, in this “beautifully written” meditation on the spiritual, emotional, and philosophical implications of end-of-life care (Jan Chozen Bays, author of Mindfulness on the Go)

As a hospital chaplain, Amy Wright Glenn has been present with those suffering from suicide, trauma, disease, and unforeseen accidents and has been witness to the intense grief and powerful insights that so often accompany loss. She weaves together memoir, philosophical inquiry, and cutting-edge research on death/dying to chronicle how we, as individuals and as a culture, handle everything from grief to mortality.

Glenn is…


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Book cover of A Beggar's Bargain

A Beggar's Bargain By Jan Sikes,

Historical Fiction Post WW2.

A shocking proposal that changes everything.

Desperate to honor his father’s dying wish, Layken Martin vows to do whatever it takes to save the family farm.
Once the Army discharges him following World War II, Layken returns to Missouri to find his legacy in shambles and…

Book cover of Time Is a Mother

Scarlet Tunkl Why did I love this book?

I knew I would love this book and I waited years to read it. I was waiting to savor it at the right time. I finally read it while moving through the painful realization of my mother’s schizoaffective disorder. She is still alive, though our relationship has had many deaths. When I need to remember that the little moments of beautiful mundanity can be as poignant as the big joys and pains of life, I go back to this book.

When I need to remember that queerness is a gift only a few of us are lucky enough to have, I go back to this book. When I need to remember that our greatest griefs come from our greatest loves, I go back to this book—over and over again.

By Ocean Vuong,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Time Is a Mother as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

"Take your time with these poems, and return to them often.” —The Washington Post

The New York Times-bestselling collection of poems from the award-winning writer Ocean Vuong

How else do we return to ourselves but to fold
The page so it points to the good part
 
In this deeply intimate second poetry collection, Ocean Vuong searches for life among the aftershocks of personal and social loss, embodying the paradox of sitting in grief while being determined to survive beyond it. Shifting through memory, and in concert with the themes of his novel On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous, Vuong contends with…


Explore my book 😀

When You Die You Will Not Be Scared to Die

By Scarlet Tunkl,

Book cover of When You Die You Will Not Be Scared to Die

What is my book about?

This artistic collection of fears about dying—and their ultimate futility in the face of the unknown—is a keepsake, a prayer book, a spell, and a gift to inspire conversations about the liberating power of death and what makes a full life.

This small book of 24 meditations on death is intentionally repetitive and hypnotic in effect and will inspire the reader to list what scares them most, come to terms with their own mortality, and realize what fears are holding them back from living life fully with 100 percent commitment. It will appeal to anyone who wishes to live with greater intention and purpose and experience more joy and appreciation of the present moment.

Book cover of No Country for Eight-Spot Butterflies: A Lyric Essay
Book cover of Advice for Future Corpses (and Those Who Love Them): A Practical Perspective on Death and Dying
Book cover of The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief

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Spirituality 320 books
End Of Life Care 18 books