I love humans. My clients and colleagues tell me that my profound love for humans is my superpower—that I make people feel safe and seen. I also understand that loving humans isn’t effortless. I wasn’t always in the loving-humans camp. While I was doing a doctorate at Harvard, I studied with the marvelous Robert Kegan, whose theory and methodology helped me see the fullness of the diverse people I got to interview. Ever since, I have been totally enthralled by what makes us unique—and also connected. If you are a human or have to deal with humans, your life will be much improved if you love them more!
I wrote
Unlocking Leadership Mindtraps: How to Thrive in Complexity
This was the first book where I finished the last page and moved immediately back to the first page to read it again. My goodness, it made me laugh so much, but it also made me feel so much. I loved the characters, the plot, the clever language. More than anything, it made me fall in love with the human condition—all of the difficulty, absurdity, and glory of it all.
The author wrote to be the book he most wanted to read when he was profoundly depressed about all the impossible foibles of humanity. It is now the book I most want to read when I want to laugh or be moved or remember what is great about being human.
After an 'incident' one wet Friday night where he is found walking naked through the streets of Cambridge, Professor Andrew Martin is not feeling quite himself. Food sickens him. Clothes confound him. Even his loving wife and teenage son are repulsive to him. He feels lost amongst an alien species and hates everyone on the planet. Everyone, that is, except Newton, and he's a dog.
Who is he really? And what could make someone change their mind about the human race . . . ?
I love a good memoir, and this one was a perfect example of the form. Thoughtful, funny, incredibly well-written, and structured, I cared deeply about Lori and her patients. As she weaves together stories from her training as a therapist, her patients, and her work with her own therapist, we see how incredibly damaging life and love are for us—and how those scars themselves make us more beautiful, more worthy of love, more capable of opening our hearts to others.
This does not make the human experience look easy or painless, but it does help me remember what the work is for and how beautiful the pathway can be when we have good company on the way. This book was excellent company for me.
Ever wonder what your therapist is thinking? Now you can find out, as therapist and New York Times bestselling author Lori Gottlieb takes us behind the scenes of her practice - where her patients are looking for answers (and so is she).
When a personal crisis causes her world to come crashing down, Lori Gottlieb - an experienced therapist with a thriving practice in Los Angeles - is suddenly adrift. Enter Wendell, himself a veteran therapist with an unconventional style, whose sessions with Gottlieb will prove transformative for her.
This is the most informative look at behavioral economics that also made me laugh out loud—often embarrassing myself on airplanes because I was reading a non-fiction book that made me actually snort with laughter.
Ariely is a profoundly accomplished researcher himself, and he’s interested in all the quirks of humanity—not to explain them away or make us look more rational than we are—but to really expose us to ourselves. I saw myself more clearly and also with more compassion by the time I finished this book and I loved my fellow humans more.
Why do smart people make irrational decisions every day? The answers will surprise you. Predictably Irrational is an intriguing, witty and utterly original look at why we all make illogical decisions.
Why can a 50p aspirin do what a 5p aspirin can't? If an item is "free" it must be a bargain, right? Why is everything relative, even when it shouldn't be? How do our expectations influence our actual opinions and decisions?
In this astounding book, behavioural economist Dan Ariely cuts to the heart of our strange behaviour, demonstrating how irrationality often supplants rational thought and that the reason for…
I love this book because it actually changed my life. The book unpacks a worldview (made obvious by the title—that we are each made up of many parts and that none of them are bad), a psychological theory, and a set of personal practices.
It is the book my friends are most likely to tell me changed their lives as they tried out one of the practices and learned new things about themselves that freed them from self-judgment, self-doubt, or just a habit about themselves that was mysterious and unhelpful. There are very few books that have offered a methodology so new and so helpful that they instantly improved my life, but this one did.
Is there some part of yourself that you wish would go away? Most of us would say yes, whether we call it addiction, the inner critic, "monkey mind," neurosis, sinfulness, bad habits, or some other disparaging name. Yet what if there were a different way to approach these aspects of yourself that leads to true healing instead of constant inner struggle? With No Bad Parts, Dr. Richard Schwartz teaches a revolutionary paradigm of understanding and relating with ourselves - a method that brings us into inner harmony, enhances self-compassion, and opens the doors to spiritual awakening.
This is my favorite book by my favorite author. Beware, this is seriously more addictive fiction than I’ve ever read before—I don’t know anyone who reads this one who hasn’t plowed through the rest of Goddard’s list and then reread them all.
I loved the characters in this book and loved the premise—that the world (like ours, but different) has gone through a cataclysmic event, and now the work is to make it better than it ever was before. Fundamentally, it is a book about friendship and goodness. This and the rest of Goddard’s books will have you believe that we can create a better world together. (The first pages are slow, but stay with them, and you will have dozens of hours of delight as you move through the whole set of her books.)
A simple act of friendship can change the course of history.
Cliopher Mdang is the personal secretary of the Last Emperor of Astandalas, the Lord of Rising Stars, the Lord Magus of Zunidh, the Sun-on-Earth, the god.
He has spent more time with the Emperor of Astandalas than any other person.
He has never once touched his lord.
He has never called him by name.
He has never initiated a conversation.
One day Cliopher invites the Sun-on-Earth home to the proverbially remote Vangavaye-ve for a holiday.
If you’re struggling with the huge amount of uncertainty, change, and complexity in your world right now, welcome to the human race!
It turns out there are a set of “mindtraps” we fall into when we’re faced with complexity that are our mind and body trying to keep us from being overwhelmed by it all. The problem is, ignoring complexity doesn’t make it go away! So if you’d like to learn how to turn complexity from a liability to a super power, read my book. You might end up loving humans—and even yourself—more as well!
When I was writing this book, several of my friends jokingly called it the Nazi baby book, with one insisting it would make a great title. Nazi Babies – admittedly, that is a catchy title, but that’s not exactly what my book is about. SS babies would be slightly more on topic, but it would be more accurate to say that I wrote a book about SS men as husbands and fathers.
From 1931 to 1945, leaders of the SS, a paramilitary group under the Nazi party, sought to transform their organization into a racially-elite family community that would serve…
From 1931 to 1945, leaders of the SS, a paramilitary group under the Nazi party, sought to transform their organization into a racially-elite family community that would serve as the Third Reich's new aristocracy. They utilized the science of eugenics to convince SS men to marry suitable wives and have many children.
Marriage and Fatherhood in the Nazi SS by Amy Carney is the first work to significantly assess the role of SS men as husbands and fathers during the Third Reich. The family community, and the place of men in this community, started with one simple order issued by…