The best books with hope about people who show moral courage in the face of traumatic or painful life circumstances

I didn’t know what to expect when I began reading Educated, and what I got was totally unexpected. This book touched a nerve and then put balm on the pain. Parts of it were too close for comfort around family trauma. Balancing family obligations with personal needs and self-care is something I struggle with and apparently something this author struggled with as well. I thought I had challenges and difficulties in my life but my goodness; how did she ever emerge from her life circumstances with such wisdom and integrity? I have been reassured by this wonderful (though painful) memoir, that what she did, I can do too!

Trevor Noah is the funniest living comedian, and he is brilliant. Who would ever guess that his childhood was filled with so much trauma? Being set in Apartheid South Africa, I was able to keep a personal distance from the story. But it still touched and inspired me, perhaps because my own children are mixed race and had they been born there, I’d not have been allowed to marry or live with their father. Unimaginable. This autobiographical accounting of Trevor’s tormented life is a testimony to his inner strength. An average person from his background might be in prison or dead. But not Trevor. The question is why he made it through with such integrity and heart. He gives a lot of credit to his mother and I appreciate that.

I think it’s the struggles and painful experiences of the 16-year-old character Nao, that kept my attention throughout this twisty-turning book. The author takes you right into Nao’s young mind. Why is it that no matter where you are in the world, being a teenager comes with such difficulty? Nao’s life was brutal on all counts, except for her relationship with her great-grandmother, Jiko, a Buddhist nun living in a remote monastery. The Japanese cultural context of this book is quite fascinating, and offers much to learn. On a personal level, I could relate to the loving, rather extraordinary relationship between Nao and her quite elderly great-grandmother. (I cherished my grandmother during my rocky teenage years!) It’s probably because of Jiko that Nao was able to handle her life. 

I read this for myself and now assign it to my students as an example of how even if we stumble in our ethics, we can stand up again and lay claim to our values. I appreciate that Suzanne Simard was transformed by the forest. And managed to trust what the forest was teaching, and follow her intuition, despite pressure to doubt herself and her insights. She shares about being a cancer patient and that journey alone was harrowing. Simard is a hero to me and because of this book I have rediscovered trees and learned to love them. Just as important, Simard inspires me to trust my inner voice and the lessons I am gleaning from nature, even in the face of being doubted and dismissed for unconventional thinking. 

This book was uncomfortable to read, and disturbing. I nearly stopped reading it all together. But past the first half, I became engrossed. Wouldn’t it be nice if, in life, actions were clearly right or simply wrong, such as murder. In actuality, life can be complicated and ethics are sometimes grey, not at all black and white. In this book, what counts as morality is perplexing. In fact, the moral integrity of Lauren, the main character, comes into question. Hers is a crumbling world of anguish, suffering, and loss, where all that matters is survival. Even though I found it difficult to digest, I recommend this book because it masterfully explores whether it’s possible to be a person of integrity in a world that has fallen into total chaos.