The best Christian books to help survive and recover from marital unfaithfulness

Harry Schaumburg Author Of Undefiled: Redemption from Sexual Sin, Restoration for Broken Relationships
By Harry Schaumburg

Who am I?

When writing about sexuality it is important to me to write about true intimacy. Especially for those who have broken their wedding vows and for those who have been betrayed, who still long for real intimacy with spiritual and sexual maturity. My book, False Intimacy: Understanding the Struggle of Sexual Addiction (1992), was the first Christian book published on the subject of sexual addiction. I have for over thirty years counseled 1000s of sexually broken people from all across the U.S. who came to see me for a week of intensive counseling. I have taught on the subject of sexuality in all fifty states as well as over twenty foreign countries. No subject is more important to our spiritual maturity and sexual maturity.

I wrote...

Undefiled: Redemption from Sexual Sin, Restoration for Broken Relationships

By Harry Schaumburg,

Book cover of Undefiled: Redemption from Sexual Sin, Restoration for Broken Relationships

What is my book about?

We are living the chaos of cybersex, impersonal sex, adultery, prostitution, pornography, incest, gender confusion, sexual dysfunction, and sexual dissatisfaction in marriage. Undefiled offers readers an opportunity to find spiritual, relational, and sexual maturity. Sexual impurity creates a cycle of destruction, that comes from a serious misunderstanding of our sexuality. Yet real change is possible, where there is sexual redemption with sexual and relational maturity.

When sexuality is practiced as our Creator designed it, we not only grow relationally and sexually but we draw ourselves closer to God. Spiritual, relational, and sexual maturity must be brought together for restoration after the damage brought by unfaithfulness. There is hope for real change and true intimacy is available. The sexually broken can be undefiled and find a new level of intimacy.

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The books I picked & why

Book cover of Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret

Why did I love this book?

After the death of our daughter, shortly after birth, I felt abandoned by God and lost all desire to serve in any form of ministry. This book, above all others that I have read, helped me personally and spiritually to not only move on with my life, face new and challenging adversities, but to return to ministry; a ministry that has drawn in thousands from across the U.S. and from twenty-five foreign countries for a week of intensive counseling.

By Howard Taylor,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

This is the classic biography of Hudson Taylor, the missionary to China and the founder of the China Inland Mission. This is a must read for anyone considering missions or already engaged in it and encouragement to any Christian.

Book cover of Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave: Finding Hope in the Power of the Gospel

Why did I love this book?

After 30 years of counseling and 1000s of people in bondage to various sexual behaviors, I take a minority view, and do not believe that addiction, and sexual addiction in particular, is a disease; it is a bondage to sin. This book, I believe helps supports that view. I find in counseling, that when you deal with the sin problem as sin, not just a behavior problem, which is a symptom of sin, lives are radically changed. I could give hundreds of examples, but one that stands out was a sexual predator who seduced 100s of women, but after a radical heart change, his marriage survived and he went on to minister and help others, rather than to continue to use others.

By Edward T. Welch,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Addictions as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Addiction, according to Welch, is when we worship ourselves and our desires instead of the true God.

Book cover of Marriage: Sex in the Service of God

Why did I love this book?

The marriage vows say, “until death do us part.” In our divorce culture, that commitment often doesn’t translate into “happily ever after.” That being the case, we must ask ourselves, is it worth getting married? Before we answer that question, we must first ask, what is the purpose of getting married? It is not primarily about sex! Christopher Ash presents the radical concept that marriage is a union for us to effectively get God’s work done. I have found that in helping couples rebuild a broken marriage, they need this understanding.

What was particular helpful in counseling sexually broken and sinful people, was to understand that therapeutic spirituality doesn’t address the heart, the heart that is deceitful. Jesus clearly states that “For out of the heart come all the evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. These are what defile a person” (Matt. 15:19, 20). No other book on marriage defined its purpose for me than this one book

By Christopher Ash,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Marriage as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The 'way of a man with a maiden' was too wonderful for the writer of Proverbs to understand. Preoccupying so many thoughts and dreams, the subject of countless songs, films and fairytales, the love between a man and a woman has always been a profound and perplexing mystery.
And yet we do not live happily ever after. Four out of ten marriages will end in divorce. Couples now choose to live together rather than marry, and those relationships are even less likely to last. People are having fewer children, later, and with a succession of partners. Ironically, just when so…

Book cover of Above All Earthly Pow'rs: Christ in a Postmodern World

Why did I love this book?

This is one of the best critiques of our postmodern culture that you can find from a writer who can make an analysis from both a theological and historical perspective. He also gives an analysis of the evangelical church and how it has been captured by that culture. David Wells points out that there is a conflict within the church today between the plague of postmodernism and the Christian gospel. We must get this sorted out, and this book not only helped me do that, but helped me guide others in accomplishing that goal. So relevant and valuable was the information in this book, I simply could not put it down until I had read it cover to cover.

By David F. Wells,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Above All Earthly Pow'rs as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

A critique of Western culture and contemporary evangelicalism.

Book cover of The Call: Finding and Fulfilling the Central Purpose of Your Life

Why did I love this book?

I have counseled 100s of pastors from across the U.S. from many different denominations, and more often than not, they were serving in ministry for what they could personally gain. I see that danger as an occupational hazard. The Call gives the clearest definition of what the call of God truly is. I was able to understand that in my own ministry, as Os Guinness states, I have nothing to gain, nothing to prove, and nothing to lose, except to hear from my Lord, “well do, good and faithful servant.” In all service and love of others, this is the motivation I must have, not only as an author and counselor, but as a friend, a parent, and a husband.

By Os Guinness,

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked The Call as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

The Call continues to stand as a classic, reflective work on life's purpose. Best-selling author Os Guinness goes beyond our surface understanding of God's call and addresses the fact that God has a specific calling for our individual lives.

Why am I here? What is God's call in my life? How do I fit God's call with my own individuality? How should God's calling affect my career, my plans for the future, my concepts of success? Guinness now helps the reader discover answers to these questions, and more, through a corresponding workbook - perfect for individual or group study.


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