I and Thou

I first read this book in college, and it has powerfully shaped my philosophy of life. Martin Buber, the great Jewish thinker, distinguished between “I-It” relationships, in which we use another person instrumentally, and “I-Thou” relationships, in which we encounter another face to face. He argues that personhood begins in the prenatal life of the child flowing to and from its mother, but ends in God where all parallel relations intersect.

As a lifelong cat lover, I’m especially fond of his idea that personhood is not limited by species. Buber recognized that we can authentically say “Thou” to a cat… show more.

When I read this book the first time, I discovered the difference between two ways to relate to others and yourself. You can relate as if the other part were a thing. Predictable and without intentions and feelings. “I and it” Buber names this way to relate. The second way is to relate as if the other part is a living being, “I and Thou.”
I discovered that I sometimes related to myself or others in the first way. And that the second way was a bit scary, because there you can predict nothing and you must be ready to… show more.

Bold in its simplicity, Buber communicates the importance of being in the present, recognizing the Divine in each and every human interaction. Rather than a “me and you” conversation, he explains how human communication should be “I and thou.”