My favorite books on sex and sexuality

Why am I passionate about this?

During a career spanning almost 50 years, Michael Castleman has become the world’s most popular sex expert you’ve probably never heard of.  He has answered more sexuality questions than anyone else on the planet.


I wrote...

Book cover of Sizzling Sex for Life: Everything You Need to Know to Maximize Erotic Pleasure at Any Age

What is my book about?

The original message that inspires all my work is “When men make love the way most women prefer, everyone benefits.” This is a sexual self-help book, a genre some deride as simplistic and ineffective. Sex is one of life’s greatest pleasures. It can also drive people crazy. I hope my book reduces confusion and misery and enhances erotic pleasure and satisfaction for lovers of all ages and erotic inclinations.

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The books I picked & why

Book cover of Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters--And How to Get It

Michael Castleman Why did I love this book?

Most men think sex is largely about intercourse, and that intercourse is how women get to orgasm. Actually, the organ that triggers orgasm in women is the clitoris, which sits outside the vagina an inch or so above it nestled beneath the top junction of the vaginal lips. Only a small fraction of women can work up to orgasm during intercourse. Most need gentle, direct, extended clitoral caresses, by hand, mouth, or sex toy. This book explains the primacy of the clitoris in women’s pleasure. It should be required reading for all men.

By Laurie Mintz,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Becoming Cliterate as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

We've been thinking about sex all wrong. Mainstream media, movies, and porn have taught us that sex = penis + vagina, and everything else is just secondary. Standard penetration is how men most reliably achieve orgasm. The problem is, women don't orgasm this way. We've separated our most reliable route to orgasm-clitoral stimulation-from how we feel we should orgasm-penetration. As a result, we've created a pleasure gap between women and men:

50% of 18-35-year-old women say they have trouble reaching orgasm with a partner 64% of women vs 91% of men said they had an orgasm at their last sexual…


Book cover of She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

Michael Castleman Why did I love this book?

This quick read has a message similar to Becoming Clitorate -- that it's not intercourse that allow most women to work up to orgasm, but gentle, extended clitoral caresses. However, unlike Becoming Clitorate, which is written by a woman for women, She Comes First is written by a man for men, so it has a different sensibility that speaks to men's way of thinking. The two books are quite complementary.

By Ian Kerner,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked She Comes First as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

“Every man’s must-read. Tell your guy to put down the remote and pick up She Comes First.”
—Cosmopolitan

 

Ian Kerner offers a radical new philosophy for pleasuring women in She Comes First—anessential guidebook to oral sex from the author of Be Honest—You’re Not That Into Him Either. The New York Times praises Kerner’s “cool sense of humor and an obsessive desire to inform,” as he “encourages men through an act that many find mystifying.” An indispensable aid to a healthier, more fulfilling sex life for her and him, She Comes First offers techniques and philosophy that have already earned raves…


Book cover of S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties

Michael Castleman Why did I love this book?

This is by far the best sex guide for teens and young adults. Most such books are written for parents, who buy them, not for young people, who need frank sex information. This book speaks directly to young people’s sexual issues. It’s a breath of fresh air in an otherwise lame field.

By Heather Corinna,

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked S.E.X. as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

As a teen or emerging adult, dealing with all the changes going on in your life, body, and mind can be mighty overwhelming. When it comes to sex, everyone seems to have strong feelings and opinions about who you should be and what you should (shouldn't) do. How do you decide who to listen to? Heather Corinna and Scarleteen have provided sex education and information to millions of young people, parents, and mentors since 1998 S.E.X tackles all the big topics:Self-image and how to find and claim your own sexual selfHow to best protect and support your sexual and emotional…


Book cover of The Survivor's Guide to Sex: How to Have an Empowered Sex Life After Child Sexual Abuse

Michael Castleman Why did I love this book?

The myth is that childhood sexual abuse is so horrific that survivors are scarred for life and can never enjoy fulfilling lovemaking. Actually, with information and therapy, survivors can enjoy deeply pleasurable and satisfying sex lives. This book points the way. 

By Staci Haines,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Survivor's Guide to Sex as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Based on the author's extensive training and experience in working with abuse survivors, The Survivor's Guide to Sex offers an affirming, sex-positive approach to recovery from incest and rape. While most books on the topic broach sexuality only to reassure women that it is alright to say "no" to unwanted sex, this one encourages women to learn how to say "yes" to their own desires and on their own terms.

Points of discussion include problems common to women survivors. Haines teaches survivors to embrace their own sexual choices and preferences, learn about their own sexual response cycles, and heal through…


Book cover of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage

Michael Castleman Why did I love this book?

Most men feel impatient with foreplay, and believe sex is all about intercourse. Actually, satisfying, high-quality lovemaking is based on leisurely, gentle, playful, mutual whole-body massage that eventually -- after 20 minutes or so--focuses on the genitals. Foreplay is not some obligation to get through. It's the bedrock basis of sizzling sex. This book is an engaging, comprehensive, hands-on guide to mutual whole-body massage. Co-author Patti Britton is one of the nation’s most distinguished and creative sex educators, and her book is marvelous.

By Patti Britton, Helen Hodgson,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Tender and erotic, a sensual massage is a highly pleasurable experience--and one of the best ways to express love and affection. Fully illustrated and easy to read, The Complete Idiot's Guide (R) to Sensual Massage includes original massage programs especially devised to relax, delight, and arouse both men and women. Everything you need to know about giving and receiving sensual massage is here: sensual massage as foreplay, for body gratification, and for healing touch methodology. The book also explains the difference between sensual massage and other types of massage, as well as how sensual massage enhances intimacy. The book will…


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Today Was A Good Day: A Collection of Essays From The Heart Of A Neurosurgeon

By Edward Benzel,

Book cover of Today Was A Good Day: A Collection of Essays From The Heart Of A Neurosurgeon

Edward Benzel Author Of Today Was A Good Day: A Collection of Essays From The Heart Of A Neurosurgeon

New book alert!

Why am I passionate about this?

Coming from the perspective of a neurosurgeon, I have witnessed many successes and failures over more than four decades. I recognized decades ago that communication with patients at a level that involves emotions is a necessary part of being a complete physician. This involves being empathetic and, henceforth, digging deep to find the strength to be transparent, vulnerable, compassionate, understanding, and, when needed, forceful (some would call this paternalism). Although the five books I have chosen to highlight vary widely in content, they have one common theme – finding within us the will and wherewithal to succeed.

Edward's book list on awakening of the strengths that are hidden deep inside each of us

What is my book about?

My book is a collection of monthly Editor-in-Chief letters to the readership of World Neurosurgery, a journal that I edit. Each essay is short and sweet. The letters were written for neurosurgeons but have been re-edited so that they apply to all human beings. They cover topics such as leadership, empathy, vulnerability, stress, burnout, and on and on…. These essays are relevant for all who strive to craft a better version of themselves.

Life lessons learned by the author during his 40+ year neurosurgery career are shared and translated into real-life scenarios. Between the covers are many lessons that are derived from the experiences of the author and then applied to all humans. The mastering of these lessons should translate into a sense of pride and satisfaction. In keeping with the theme of the book, this process should culminate in the feeling at the end of the day that ‘Today was, indeed, a good day.’

Today Was A Good Day: A Collection of Essays From The Heart Of A Neurosurgeon

By Edward Benzel,

What is this book about?

About the Book
Today Was A Good Day: A Collection of Essays From The Heart Of A Neurosurgeon features many topics that pertain to how neurosurgeons interact with others and how each of us can use introspection to modify how we are using tools and strategies such as empathy, respect, stress management, and much more.
This book provides some insights into leadership, effective communication, and fulfillment from the perspective of a neurosurgeon, and it causes the reader to think about and consider many, many attributes of a leader.
We all want to have a good day. This book provides strategies…


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