The best books on sex and sexuality

Who am I?

During a career spanning almost 50 years, Michael Castleman has become the world’s most popular sex expert you’ve probably never heard of.  He has answered more sexuality questions than anyone else on the planet.


I wrote...

Sizzling Sex for Life: Everything You Need to Know to Maximize Erotic Pleasure at Any Age

By Michael Castleman,

Book cover of Sizzling Sex for Life: Everything You Need to Know to Maximize Erotic Pleasure at Any Age

What is my book about?

The original message that inspires all my work is “When men make love the way most women prefer, everyone benefits.” This is a sexual self-help book, a genre some deride as simplistic and ineffective. Sex is one of life’s greatest pleasures. It can also drive people crazy. I hope my book reduces confusion and misery and enhances erotic pleasure and satisfaction for lovers of all ages and erotic inclinations.

The books I picked & why

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Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters--And How to Get It

By Laurie Mintz,

Book cover of Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters--And How to Get It

Why this book?

Most men think sex is largely about intercourse, and that intercourse is how women get to orgasm. Actually, the organ that triggers orgasm in women is the clitoris, which sits outside the vagina an inch or so above it nestled beneath the top junction of the vaginal lips. Only a small fraction of women can work up to orgasm during intercourse. Most need gentle, direct, extended clitoral caresses, by hand, mouth, or sex toy. This book explains the primacy of the clitoris in women’s pleasure. It should be required reading for all men.


She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

By Ian Kerner,

Book cover of She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

Why this book?

This quick read has a message similar to Becoming Clitorate -- that it's not intercourse that allow most women to work up to orgasm, but gentle, extended clitoral caresses. However, unlike Becoming Clitorate, which is written by a woman for women, She Comes First is written by a man for men, so it has a different sensibility that speaks to men's way of thinking. The two books are quite complementary.


S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties

By Heather Corinna,

Book cover of S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties

Why this book?

This is by far the best sex guide for teens and young adults. Most such books are written for parents, who buy them, not for young people, who need frank sex information. This book speaks directly to young people’s sexual issues. It’s a breath of fresh air in an otherwise lame field.


The Survivor's Guide to Sex: How to Have an Empowered Sex Life After Child Sexual Abuse

By Staci Haines,

Book cover of The Survivor's Guide to Sex: How to Have an Empowered Sex Life After Child Sexual Abuse

Why this book?

The myth is that childhood sexual abuse is so horrific that survivors are scarred for life and can never enjoy fulfilling lovemaking. Actually, with information and therapy, survivors can enjoy deeply pleasurable and satisfying sex lives. This book points the way. 


The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage

By Patti Britton, Helen Hodgson,

Book cover of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage

Why this book?

Most men feel impatient with foreplay, and believe sex is all about intercourse. Actually, satisfying, high-quality lovemaking is based on leisurely, gentle, playful, mutual whole-body massage that eventually -- after 20 minutes or so--focuses on the genitals. Foreplay is not some obligation to get through. It's the bedrock basis of sizzling sex. This book is an engaging, comprehensive, hands-on guide to mutual whole-body massage. Co-author Patti Britton is one of the nation’s most distinguished and creative sex educators, and her book is marvelous.


5 book lists we think you will like!

Interested in sexuality, sex education, and Christianity?

5,215 authors have recommended their favorite books and what they love about them. Browse their picks for the best books about sexuality, sex education, and Christianity.

Sexuality Explore 25 books about sexuality
Sex Education Explore 5 books about sex education
Christianity Explore 284 books about Christianity

And, 3 books we think you will enjoy!

We think you will like Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex: But Were Afraid to Ask, Faithful: A Theology of Sex, and Divine Sex: A Compelling Vision for Christian Relationships in a Hypersexualized Age if you like this list.