The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read

Books offering support to parents have come on in leaps and bounds since the days when Gina Ford and Supernanny-style discipline reigned supreme. This book is my go-to book for practical advice.

Perry, a psychotherapist with more than 20 years of experience, is not interested in manipulating children’s behaviour with naughty steps and sticker charts. Her approach may incidentally help to get your children to brush their teeth and eat their vegetables, but her emphasis is on the far deeper and more important business of how to build a mutually respectful and cooperative relationship. Her voice is wise and refreshingly… show more.

This book explores the bigger picture of a child’s well-being by examining the two ingredients of emotional intelligence: intrapersonal awareness (understanding yourself) and interpersonal awareness (understanding others). Parry doesn’t give the reader a set of strict techniques and rules to follow. Instead, it is more of a philosophy to develop a child’s emotional resilience by making them feel safe and valued. My main takeaways from the book were to be more present with my child, to question my own behaviour and reactions to her behaviours, to create a loving environment where my child’s feelings (no matter how trivial they may… show more.

Another guest on my podcast, psychotherapist Philippa Perry looks at how the sort of parenting you received influences the sort of parent you will be. She likens it to being a link in a chain and she explains how to be a different shape and not repeat your mother or father’s mistakes. She will help you understand your children’s feelings and managing them in a way that is both accepting and shows how to fit into the wider world. The bonus is that Philippa is often really funny.