100 books like Psychopathology of Everyday Life

If you are going to read one book about how to be a better salesperson, read this one. Cialdini is a master, and most modern sales psychology books are built off of his work in this book. I have used all six of the principles that he lays out in this book to grow the real estate business, but I especially love the principle of reciprocity.

In a nutshell, this is the power of giving gifts to build relationships, and it is one of the main things I learned from reading to grow my business. When I show a property, I bring water, snacks, and beer. I follow up with my clients with at least 5 personal gifts a year. Cialdini also teaches the power of accepting gifts from others, and I always accept a glass of water, a snack, or anything else my clients offer me. You are not… show more.

This is a psychology book, maybe not what some would consider about “behavior,” and it’s a fairly heavy and dense one. But I feel I must include it as it has helped me understand human mental struggles more than any other book I’ve read. And a key part of understanding human behavior, especially the broader societal and political aspects, is understanding those dark, often under-the-surface struggles that we all deal with. It is the wisest book I’ve ever read, and I have bought it for many people. Yalom has become a sort of secular guru for me. It is that good.

I picked a book on language to lead the pack because there is so much more practical and reliable information contained in language, compared to the often murky and highly variable area of physical behavior. If you’re new to this area, this book is a fantastic introduction to how much information can be contained in language, whether written or spoken. McClish examines language for meaning from a bunch of true crime and legal cases. (Maybe of interest: this book inspired me to write my book Verbal Poker Tells, and I interviewed McClish for my podcast.)

Paul Ekman is a well known researcher of human behavior and facial expressions and indicators of lying. He’s written several books that many serious students of behavior have read, and this is a good one to start with. He delves into the meaning of various facial expressions, and also explains how research shows the universal, cross-cultural nature of our underlying emotions and how those show up in our faces.

Probably the best place to start with Yalom, this book is a must-read for therapists, and I recommend it regularly to anyone getting started in the business, or even contemplating pursuing a career in psychotherapy. The hardest guide to write about psychotherapy is the book about “technique” - not the highfalutin theory laced with opaque language book, but the hands-on, “this is what you say when someone says this” or “here's what you can do when you run into someone in this sort of situation” book.  This is that book, and only Yalom, with his immense experience and humility, could pull off this slender guide, packed with the wisdom of decades of working, alone, in a room with another human being in pain.  I return to this book regularly and always find something new and useful in his words.

I devoured this book and its main premise: that to be a therapist is a great art and a deep discipline. Yalom is the inspiration for many psychology and psychotherapy students and trainees, and for good reason. He is the kindly, wise father many of us wish we had.

I adored this book for its insights into psychotherapy and the therapy room and for the tenderness with which Yalom treats his patients. He was also one of the first professionals to openly and publicly share his own emotions and thoughts about his patients and being a therapist. He powerfully puts forward the ‘human first, therapist second’ philosophy, one that informed my work fundamentally. He takes chances, loves his patients sincerely, and, as a result, was a hugely respected clinician who taught as well as he practiced. It is a great read for patients and therapists alike.  

I chose this book for a trip because it’s compact (easy to pack) and brimming with psychology facts.

Instead of staring at the plane’s ceiling for hours, I disappeared into a fun refresher course on the core ideas of psychology. It’s a great read for anyone who wants to brush up on their foundational concepts in a way that feels natural and entertaining.

Onto the darker side, now. This book outlines how narcissists behave but also posits an opposite force to narcissism (which is why I like it so much).

It’s written by a psychoanalyst, so Freud is lurking in the background, which I don’t always like, but Symington’s ideas are so interesting… Given the plethora of narcissistic politicians in the current world, this book is extraordinarily timely.

This book summarizes the contributions of Otto Rank, the brilliant and influential psychoanalyst. Rank focused on two core psychological motivations, the desires for psychological security on the one hand, and for stimulation, growth, and creativity on the other. His work illuminates how these desires often work in concert but also often can be in opposition over the course of the lifespan, contributing to guilt, anxiety, and stunting growth. Rank’s analysis inspired the development of both existential psychology and humanistic psychology. Rank’s approach to psychological well-being is based on accepting and even affirming the limitations of life, understanding what you really want in life, and developing the will to move creatively toward achieving those goals so that one can live an authentic and satisfying life.   

Explaining Humans engagingly begins, “It was five years into my life on Earth that I started to think I’d landed in the wrong place. I must have missed the stop.”

Part popular science, part memoir, part clarion call for neuroinclusion, Pang’s book is full of sophisticated and memorable observations about humans, neurodiversity, and Pang’s own neurodivergence.

I particularly enjoyed her comparison of the teamwork between human cells (neutral, effective, politics-free!) with that of typical human collaboration…and how much it made me realize that we can all substantially improve the latter at work to get the best out of each other and fulfill our collective potential.