The best books for siblings who squabble

Why am I passionate about this?

I am a Child Psychologist and Author turned Parent Coach who often hears about the bickering, put-downs, jealousy, and conflict sapping families with multiple children. Telling them to “cut it out” clearly does nothing. Kids need not only the skills (how to talk, how to listen, how to manage feelings and resolve conflict) but also the motivation to use them, a combination I have spent my career thinking about, writing about, and teaching. All of the books I have written, and all that I recommend, include this winning combination of skills and motivation with the aim of helping children live happier lives.


I wrote...

The Sibling Survival Guide: Surefire Ways to Solve Conflicts, Reduce Rivalry, and Have More Fun with Your Brothers and Sisters

By Dawn Huebner, Kara McHale (illustrator),

Book cover of The Sibling Survival Guide: Surefire Ways to Solve Conflicts, Reduce Rivalry, and Have More Fun with Your Brothers and Sisters

What is my book about?

Having a brother or sister can be tough. It can also be great, but it’s hard to see the great parts with so many bad parts getting in the way. Things like fighting and bossing. Teasing and jealousy. Tattling. Pestering. You get the idea. The Sibling Survival Guide speaks directly to children ages 9-12, teaching the skills needed to manage feelings, resolve conflicts, and strengthen bonds. Warm, witty, and packed with practical strategies, this interactive book educates, motivates, and empowers siblings to live in peace.

Shepherd is reader supported. When you buy books, we may earn an affiliate commission.

The books I picked & why

Book cover of Siblings: You're Stuck with Each Other, So Stick Together

Dawn Huebner Why did I love this book?

This was one of the first books targeting not preschoolers adjusting to a new baby but older kids struggling to get along. It is perfectly pitched to middle-grade readers, with just the right balance of direct talk and humor. The book normalizes sibling conflict while providing solutions 8-13-year-olds can implement on their own or with the help of a parent. Written in 2010, this book stands the test of time.

By James J. Crist, Elizabeth Verdick,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Siblings as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Humorous yet practical advice for building positive sibling relationships. Turn sibling rivalry into positive sibling relationships with this fun, humorous pocket guide for kids. Siblings can make for great friends, and it s nice to have someone who ll love you no matter what. But kids know that sibling relationships can be hard when problems of fairness, jealousy, conflict, tattling, privacy, and other things come up and they usually do. Siblings teaches kids how to deal with sibling rivalry and more, including special situations such as siblings with special needs, step-siblings, and adopted siblings, and it focuses on building positive…


Book cover of My Sibling

Dawn Huebner Why did I love this book?

My Sibling is an activity book with drawing prompts, stickers, crafts, and activities just right for 6-10-year-olds. Touching on jealousy, fairness, sharing, and more, the book gently guides children to try new ways of thinking and behaving towards their siblings. An extensive section for parents and caregivers more fully explains what parents can do to help their children get along.

By Isabelle Filliozat, Éric Veillé (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked My Sibling as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

This helpful activity book offers activities to help kids get along with their brothers and sisters. Kids think that they are expected to love their brothers and sisters unconditionally, but sibling relationships can be really complicated. This book covers jealousy, fairness, sharing, parent-relationship, and tons more and helps kids find a common ground with their siblings if things get too fraught or upsetting. Includes an extensive section for parents and caregivers with tools and tips for exploring the topic.


Book cover of Oh, Brother... Oh, Sister!: A Sister's Guide to Getting Along

Dawn Huebner Why did I love this book?

Pitched to 9-11-year-old girls, Oh Brother…Oh Sister! is a practical guide kids can read on their own or together with a younger sibling (of either gender). There are activities for siblings to do with one another, and plenty of humor to keep kids laughing as they absorb important lessons about getting along. A surprising number of children are motivated to sign the Sibling Constitution at the back of the book, and to honor the agreements they’ve made. The only downside is that the book is clearly written for girls. It’s a pity, boys could use a book like this, too.

By Brooks Whitney, Laura Cornell (illustrator),

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Oh, Brother... Oh, Sister! as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 9, 10, 11, and 12.

What is this book about?

A girl's guide to getting along with siblings and surviving sticky situations offers advice on everything from teasing to tattling to sharing a room and includes tips, quizzes, and a special section of tear-outs. Original.


Book cover of Autism in My Family: A Journal for Siblings of Children with ASD

Dawn Huebner Why did I love this book?

This book beautifully explores the challenge of living with an autistic sibling. Eight – 12-year-olds are invited to draw/write about their feelings and experiences on their own and/or with a parent or their special-needs sibling. The basics of autism are explained to help children understand why their sibling acts the way they do, increasing empathy, reducing frustration, and decreasing conflict. This is a gentle, normalizing, and ultimately empowering book geared to families living with autism but potentially useful to children with special-needs siblings of all stripes.

By Sandra Tucker,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Autism in My Family as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 8, 9, 10, and 11.

What is this book about?

The relationship between siblings can be tough, and the sibling dynamic can be further challenged when one child has autism. This interactive workbook is designed for siblings of children with autism. Introducing the experience of autism in simple language, children are encouraged to complete activities that identify differences and strengthen relationships. This book is focussed on understanding and supporting a sibling while developing individual emotions and identity. The pages are designed to be drawn on and personalized by the child. Ideal for young children aged 8-12 who have a sibling with autism, the activities can be completed with a parent's…


Book cover of Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

Dawn Huebner Why did I love this book?

This one is for parents, not kids, but I included it because what parents do (or don’t do), say (or don’t say) is such an important part of the equation when it comes to sibling rivalry. Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings teaches the basics of Emotion Coaching (introduced in Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids by the same author), then walks readers through using this approach with multiple children. Grounded in brain science, pairing firm limits with genuine empathy, parents who take the time to learn/practice this way of parenting will undoubtedly see a significant reduction in sibling squabbles, and in conflict more broadly.

By Dr. Laura Markham,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Popular parenting expert Dr. Laura Markham, author of PEACEFUL PARENTS, HAPPY SIBLINGS, has garnered a large and loyal readership around the world, thanks to her simple, insightful approach that values the emotional bond between parent and child. As any parent of more than one child knows, though, it’s challenging for even the most engaged parent to maintain harmony and a strong connection when competition, tempers, and irritation run high.
 
In this highly anticipated guide, Dr. Markham presents simple yet powerful ways to cut through the squabbling and foster a loving, supportive bond between siblings, while giving each child the vital…


You might also like...

Who Is a Worthy Mother?: An Intimate History of Adoption

By Rebecca Wellington,

Book cover of Who Is a Worthy Mother?: An Intimate History of Adoption

Rebecca Wellington Author Of Who Is a Worthy Mother?: An Intimate History of Adoption

New book alert!

Why am I passionate about this?

I am adopted. For most of my life, I didn’t identify as adopted. I shoved that away because of the shame I felt about being adopted and not truly fitting into my family. But then two things happened: I had my own biological children, the only two people I know to date to whom I am biologically related, and then shortly after my second daughter was born, my older sister, also an adoptee, died of a drug overdose. These sequential births and death put my life on a new trajectory, and I started writing, out of grief, the history of adoption and motherhood in America. 

Rebecca's book list on straight up, real memoirs on motherhood and adoption

What is my book about?

I grew up thinking that being adopted didn’t matter. I was wrong. This book is my journey uncovering the significance and true history of adoption practices in America. Now, in the wake of the U.S. Supreme Court’s overturning of Roe v. Wade, the renewed debate over women’s reproductive rights places an even greater emphasis on adoption. As a mother, historian, and adoptee, I am uniquely qualified to uncover the policies and practices of adoption.

The history of adoption, reframed through the voices of adoptees like me, and mothers who have been forced to relinquish their babies, blows apart old narratives about adoption, exposing the fallacy that adoption is always good.

In this story, I reckon with the pain and unanswered questions of my own experience and explore broader issues surrounding adoption in the United States, including changing legal policies, sterilization, and compulsory relinquishment programs, forced assimilation of babies of color and Indigenous babies adopted into white families, and other liabilities affecting women, mothers, and children. Now is the moment we must all hear these stories.

Who Is a Worthy Mother?: An Intimate History of Adoption

By Rebecca Wellington,

What is this book about?

Nearly every person in the United States is affected by adoption. Adoption practices are woven into the fabric of American society and reflect how our nation values human beings, particularly mothers. In the wake of the U.S. Supreme Court's overturning of Roe v. Wade, the renewed debate over women's reproductive rights places an even greater emphasis on adoption. As a mother, historian, and adoptee, Rebecca C. Wellington is uniquely qualified to uncover the policies and practices of adoption. Wellington's timely-and deeply researched-account amplifies previously marginalized voices and exposes the social and racial biases embedded in the United States' adoption industry.…


5 book lists we think you will like!

Interested in sibling, parenting, and autism?

10,000+ authors have recommended their favorite books and what they love about them. Browse their picks for the best books about sibling, parenting, and autism.

Sibling Explore 214 books about sibling
Parenting Explore 347 books about parenting
Autism Explore 65 books about autism