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Concealed Paperback – April 21, 2020
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Esther Amini grew up in Queens, New York, during the freewheeling 1960s. She also grew up in a Persian-Jewish household, the American-born daughter of parents who had fled Mashhad, Iran. In Concealed, she tells the story of being caught between these two worlds: the dutiful daughter of tradition-bound parents who hungers for more self-determination than tradition allows.
Exploring the roots of her father's deep silences and explosive temper, her mother's flamboyance and flights from home, and her own sense of indebtedness to her Iranian-born brothers, Amini uncovers the story of her parents' early years in Mashhad, Iran's holiest Muslim city; the little-known history of Mashhad's underground Jews; the incident that steeled her mother's resolve to leave; and her parents' arduous journey to the U.S., where they faced a new threat to their traditions: the threat of freedom. Determined to protect his daughter from corruption, Amini's father prohibits talk, books, education, and pushes an early Persian marriage instead. Can she resist? Should she? Focused intently on what she stands to gain, Amini comes to see what she also stands to lose: a family and community bound by food, celebrations, sibling escapades, and unexpected acts of devotion by parents to whom she feels invisible.
In this poignant, funny, entertaining, and uplifting memoir, Amini documents with keen eye, quick wit, and warm heart how family members build, buoy, wound, and save one another across generations; how lives are shaped by the demands and burdens of loyalty and legacy; and how she rose to the challenge of deciding what to keep and what to discard.
Praise for Concealed
"In this beautifully crafted memoir, Esther Amini weaves a riveting portrait of her family life as the daughter of Iranian-Jewish immigrants in New York City.... It is a deeply personal tale, painfully honest and brilliantly told."--Susan Mailer, psychoanalyst and author of In Another Place
"Concealed is a heart-wrenching...memoir by the daughter of...Iranian Jews who...never escape the emotional prison of their previous existence. You will cheer for her as you ponder the eternal question: how do we survive our families?"--Sally Koslow, author of Another Side of Paradise
"Concealed is Esther Amini's remarkable account of growing up in a house where books and education are for boys and prearranged marriage is supposed to be her destiny....Lucky for us she grew up to be a writer...who has produced a wonderful memoir." --Patty Dann, author of Mermaids
"A moving, honest and compelling memoir that unveils the little-known world of Persian-Jewish
immigrants in America.... Amini's characters leap off the page right into your heart." --Ronda Spinak, Artistic Director, Jewish Women's Theatre
Esther Amini is a writer, painter, and psychoanalytic psychotherapist in private practice. Her short stories have appeared in Elle, Lilith, Tablet, The Jewish Week, and Proximity. She was awarded Aspen Words' Emerging Writer Fellowship in 2016 based on an early draft of this memoir. Her pieces have been performed by Jewish Women's Theatre, which name her Artist-in-Residence in 2019. Esther Amini lives in New York City with her husband. Concealed is her debut memoir.
- Print length310 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherGreenpoint Press
- Publication dateApril 21, 2020
- Dimensions6 x 0.7 x 9 inches
- ISBN-100990619427
- ISBN-13978-0990619420
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Editorial Reviews
Review
"In this beautifully crafted memoir, Esther Amini weaves a riveting portrait of her family life as the daughter of Iranian-Jewish immigrants in New York City.... It is a deeply personal tale, painfully honest and brilliantly told."-- Susan Mailer, psychoanalyst and author of In Another Place
"Concealed is a heart-wrenching...memoir by the daughter of...Iranian Jews who...never escape the emotional prison of their previous existence. You will cheer for her as you ponder the eternal question: how do we survive our families?"-- Sally Koslow, author of Another Side of Paradise
"Concealed is Esther Amini's remarkable account of growing up in a house where books and education are for boys and prearranged marriage is supposed to be her destiny....Lucky for us she grew up to be a writer...who has produced a wonderful memoir." -- Patty Dann, author of Mermaids
"A moving, honest and compelling memoir that unveils the little-known world of Persian-Jewish immigrants in America.... Amini's characters leap off the page right into your heart." -- Ronda Spinak, Artistic Director, Jewish Women's Theatre
About the Author
Product details
- Publisher : Greenpoint Press (April 21, 2020)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 310 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0990619427
- ISBN-13 : 978-0990619420
- Item Weight : 1.01 pounds
- Dimensions : 6 x 0.7 x 9 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #796,403 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #257 in Iran History
- #455 in Jewish Biographies
- #566 in Historical Middle East Biographies
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When her parents fled Iran in the late 1940s to start over in New York, they looked forward to living openly as Jews, but the reality was a lot harder to adjust to. Amini's parents carried heavy psychological baggage with them that the author teases out chapter by chapter to reveal a fascinating, and heartbreaking portrait of her two parents, caught between old world Persian values focused on just one aim when it came to their only daughter-- raising Amini to excel in the domestic and culinary arts of Persia. If her parents get their way, she would be married off to a Jewish Masshad suitor chosen by her parents at as young an age as possible.
But Amini, happens to have two older brothers who introduce her to the world of books from a young age. Being smart, studious, and determined to get the education her parents never had, she is also a loyal daughter.
Out of the range of her domineering parents, she will gradually speak up and demand for herself an education, freedom to make her own decisions, and liberation. This memoir starts off as an expose of her mismatched parents, their quasi-comic marriage, the psychological abuse, and manipulation Amini endured in childhood to be molded into the perfect Iranian Jewish wife–the prerequisite being she be as little educated as possible. But this smart, ambitious child, is determined to not follow her parents' wishes, and with the sympathy and support of her two older brothers, she will follow her own dream to become the first college-educated woman in her family.
The way Amini triumphs makes for an exceptional read. As a psychoanalyst, the author isn't going to let her own parents off the hook. But she isn’t going to bore the readers with a tale of victimhood either. She is far too astute for that. She’s done a lifetime of work on herself and this is what makes Concealed such a great read. With many decades of experience helping others heal the memories of their own traumatic childhoods, she dissects her own process of childhood neglect, abuse, and the long road to recovery by learning to love herself and even love her erratic parents. At the same time, Amini throws a spotlight on the rich transplanted Persian culture of Forest Hills, New York, where she is raised in a home wafting with spices and mouthwatering delicacies.
The only one of three children born in the USA, but raised more like a foreigner than an American, Esther reveals her family history and how she gradually overcame her fears, familial constraints, and rocky experiences to become successful in life.
I really appreciated how Esther was able to find what was of value in an atypical upbringing that might have crippled other people’s ability to thrive. She shares how she healed herself as an adult. It is easier for many, if not most people, to see the bad and not see what might have been positive in one’s upbringing.
I highly recommend this memoir to all who want to better understand different cultures and how they impact society and families through multiple generations. It was an eye opening story. We are each a product of our times and place, as well as our parents and ancestors. Esther Amini shows especially well how her life was so different for her than for her two brothers —due to differing values and experiences for males versus females in her family’s culture.
Esther brought her family to life in a very engaging way and her writing has made me re-examine my own family history and upbringing in a new light.
what a complex and difficult situation in which she was cast! Her parents both from Iran in a somewhat ill advised marriage and totally different ideas of what they wanted from life, from marriage, and from offspring, and neither of them really knowing what they were doing or getting into, or the possibilities of life, people, or society in different settings, made for an unlevel basis of her life. An interesting picture into the trials brought about by two very different sets of desires of the parents and the totally unique one of herself! Comabined with the history of Judaism – both in Iran and worldwide – it made for an intriguing and riveting individual self history.
In some ways, I enjoyed the book, but in some ways, it brought up a whole range of emotions and feelings – some of which were more than a little uncomfortable. And it was very clear that there was a combination of love, fear, and questioning toward both of her parents.
Top reviews from other countries
These people lived as Crypto Jews, living a life of duplicity in this Muslim town, in order to survive.
It is a captivating, at times disturbing, read.
Barbara Purcell
Oshawa Ontario
Other, less intrepid daughters would have written them off as impossible but Esther was able to stay within the paradox of where they came from and the new life they brought to their family. Highly recommended.