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The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind Paperback – September 11, 2012

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 19,683 ratings

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NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The authors of No-Drama Discipline and The Yes Brain explain the new science of how a child’s brain is wired and how it matures in this pioneering, practical book.

“Simple, smart, and effective solutions to your child’s struggles.”—Harvey Karp, M.D.

In this pioneering, practical book, Daniel J. Siegel, neuropsychiatrist and author of the bestselling
Mindsight, and parenting expert Tina Payne Bryson offer a revolutionary approach to child rearing with twelve key strategies that foster healthy brain development, leading to calmer, happier children. The authors explain—and make accessible—the new science of how a child’s brain is wired and how it matures. The “upstairs brain,” which makes decisions and balances emotions, is under construction until the mid-twenties. And especially in young children, the right brain and its emotions tend to rule over the logic of the left brain. No wonder kids throw tantrums, fight, or sulk in silence. By applying these discoveries to everyday parenting, you can turn any outburst, argument, or fear into a chance to integrate your child’s brain and foster vital growth.

Complete with age-appropriate strategies for dealing with day-to-day struggles and illustrations that will help you explain these concepts to your child,
The Whole-Brain Child shows you how to cultivate healthy emotional and intellectual development so that your children can lead balanced, meaningful, and connected lives.

“[A] useful child-rearing resource for the entire family . . . The authors include a fair amount of brain science, but they present it for both adult and child audiences.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Strategies for getting a youngster to chill out [with] compassion.”—The Washington Post

“This erudite, tender, and funny book is filled with fresh ideas based on the latest neuroscience research. I urge all parents who want kind, happy, and emotionally healthy kids to read The Whole-Brain Child. This is my new baby gift.”—Mary Pipher, Ph.D., author of Reviving Ophelia and The Shelter of Each Other

“Gives parents and teachers ideas to get all parts of a healthy child’s brain working together.”
—Parent to Parent

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From the Publisher

Cultivate healthy development so that children can lead balanced, meaningful, and connected lives.

Cultivate healthy development so that children can lead balanced, meaningful, and connected lives.

Daniel Goleman says Anyone who cares for children should read The Whole-Brain Child

Christine Carter, PH.D. says chock-full of strategies for raising happy, resilient children.

Editorial Reviews

Review

Advance praise for The Whole-Brain Child

“Siegel and Bryson reveal that an integrated brain with parts that cooperate in a coordinated and balanced manner creates a better understanding of self, stronger relationships, and success in school, among other benefits. With illustrations, charts, and even a handy ‘Refrigerator Sheet,’ the authors have made every effort to make brain science parent-friendly.”—
Publishers Weekly

“Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson have created a masterful, reader-friendly guide to helping children grow their emotional intelligence. This brilliant method transforms everyday interactions into valuable brain-shaping moments. Anyone who cares for children—or who loves a child—should read
The Whole-Brain Child.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence

“Fears? Fights? Frustrations? Help is here! Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson turn leading brain science into simple, smart—and effective—solutions to your child's struggles.”—Harvey Karp, M.D., bestselling author of
The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block

“This erudite, tender, and funny book is filled with fresh ideas based on the latest neuroscience research. I urge all parents who want kind, happy, and emotionally healthy kids to read
The Whole-Brain Child. I wish I had read it when my kids were young, but no one knew then what Siegel and Bryson share with us in an immensely practical way. This is my new baby gift.”—Mary Pipher, Ph.D., author of Reviving Ophelia and The Shelter of Each Other

The Whole-Brain Child is chock-full of strategies for raising happy, resilient children. It offers powerful tools for helping children develop the emotional intelligence they will need to be successful in the world. Parents will learn ways to feel more connected to their children and more satisfied in their role as a parent. Most of all, The Whole-Brain Child helps parents teach kids about how their brain actually works, giving even very young children the self-understanding that can lead them to make good choices and, ultimately, to lead meaningful and joyful lives.”—Christine Carter, Ph.D., author of Raising Happiness

“In their dynamic and readable new book, Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson sweep aside the old models of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ parenting to offer a scientific focus: the impact of parenting on brain development. Parents will certainly recognize themselves in the lively ‘aha’ anecdotes that fill these pages. More important, they will see how everyday empathy and insight can help a child to integrate his or her experience and develop a more resilient brain.”—Michael Thompson, Ph.D., co-author of the bestselling
Raising Cain

About the Author

Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., is clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine, the founding co-director of the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center, and executive director of the Mindsight Institute. A graduate of Harvard Medical School, Dr. Siegel is the author of several books, including the New York Times bestsellers Brainstorm, Mind, and, with Tina Payne Bryson, The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline. He is also the author of the bestsellers Mindsight and, with Mary Hartzell, Parenting from the Inside Out. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife, with welcome visits from their adult son and daughter.

Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., is a pediatric and adolescent psychotherapist, parenting consultant, and the director of parenting education and development for the Mindsight Institute. A frequent lecturer to parents, educators, and professionals, she lives near Los Angeles with her husband and three children.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 0553386697
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Bantam; Illustrated edition (September 11, 2012)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 192 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9780553386691
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0553386691
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.31 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.18 x 0.51 x 7.95 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 19,683 ratings

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Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
19,683 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book provides effective parenting advice and strategies to help children develop emotional intelligence, resilience, and problem-solving skills. They find it easy to understand, straightforward, and practical. The book is suitable for all ages, starting with young children. Readers appreciate the clear illustrations and scenarios that make the concepts easy to implement.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

727 customers mention "Parenting advice"695 positive32 negative

Customers find the book provides actionable strategies to help children develop emotional intelligence, resilience, and problem-solving skills. They appreciate the cartoon versions that illustrate the various nurturing strategies. The book addresses brain development and how it relates to discipline and teaching children. The lessons and perspectives the authors teach are priceless for parents who want to have good, stable, and loving children. It is rich with examples, helping them address situations with patience and has in turn helped them calm down easier. The book provides 12 basic strategies that can help aid in behavioral issues in children, enable "teachable moments", and explain the science behind the actions.

"...I not only understand more about my daughter’s brain and thought process and emotions, but I also understand more about myself, and how my handling..." Read more

"Loved reading this so much. Lots of helpful and easy to understand information regarding child psych and development...." Read more

"...and Stages" material (on Pages 154-168) because it creates a wide and deep context, a frame of reference, for the abundance of information, insights..." Read more

"...This book addresses brain development and how it relates to discipline/teaching children how to be healthy and happy adults who value healthy and..." Read more

374 customers mention "Readability"345 positive29 negative

Customers find the book's theme easy to understand and approachable. They appreciate the illustrated dialogues that make the process clear. The writing style is straightforward, practical, and realistic. Readers appreciate the authors' simple suggestions on how you can parent in a straightforward way. The paperback version has easier access to brain diagrams than the Kindle version.

"...Beyond the concepts, this book provides practical, easy to understand techniques. And darn it if they don’t work...." Read more

"Loved reading this so much. Lots of helpful and easy to understand information regarding child psych and development...." Read more

"...It was a quick, easy read, the literature was not difficult to understand...." Read more

"...First off, the way it is written is very casual and familiar, which makes it very accessible to anyone who is even remotely literate...." Read more

68 customers mention "Age range"64 positive4 negative

Customers find the book helpful for parents and children of all ages. It provides strategies for helping children integrate different aspects of their thinking, including infancy and toddler years. The chart at the end provides strategies appropriate for helping children integrate emotional, social, and behavioral development through age twelve.

"...it relates to discipline/teaching children how to be healthy and happy adults who value healthy and cooperative relationships with others...." Read more

"...psychology into basic language for a general audience, for use in direct child interactions...." Read more

"...GIVE IT A READ! BE OPEN MINDED! HAVE FUN! ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN! NURTURE THEM! THEY ARE OUR FUTURE!" Read more

"Such a good book into the mind and thinking of a child!..." Read more

59 customers mention "Ease of application"45 positive14 negative

Customers find the book's strategies easy to apply and remember. They appreciate the specific interactions that help connect the dots in their child's brain. The strategies are practical and usable right away. The book provides real-life examples and smart suggestions. It is set up well and suited for parents of children from 0-12 years old, which is convenient and valuable for parenting.

"...For me, this makes them easier to remember and implement. After reading this book, I *get* it...." Read more

"...It was a quick, easy read, the literature was not difficult to understand...." Read more

"...I liked the ideas in the book that helped me to understand how the different parts of the brain works and how to utilize the skills to activate the..." Read more

"...Again, they are intensive and hard to do in the moment the behavior is being exhibited by the child...." Read more

50 customers mention "Illustrations"46 positive4 negative

Customers find the illustrations in the book helpful and well-researched. They appreciate the drawings of different situations with good and bad reactions that are clear and easy to absorb. The diagrams are also excellent for talking with kids about how their brains work. The book provides a great description of how the brain works in lay terms and visual aids. It finishes with a chart of how to use those techniques at each age range.

"...Dozens of eminently appropriate illustrations were created by Tuesday Mourning...." Read more

"...The illustrations are helpful in showing the dos and don'ts (not labelled as such, thankfully), but I found myself thinking the don'ts were many..." Read more

"...It was laid out beautifully and very easy to absorb. I’ll easily be able to remember the main points and apply them when applicable...." Read more

"...Conflict, are but a few of the strategies the authors present in a thoughtful and accessible format, one that respects the role of relationships..." Read more

32 customers mention "Actionable"27 positive5 negative

Customers find the book provides actionable parenting advice in a comic strip format. They appreciate the realistic scenarios and follow-up suggestions from each chapter. The scenarios are presented in an easy-to-understand way with actionable takeaways. Readers also mention that the book helps them think about how to handle situations when it feels like their kids are acting up.

"...It really helps you stop and think about how to handle situations when it feels like your kids are really trying to push all of the buttons...." Read more

"...Even has cool little cartoon portions so you can post up with your kids and walk them through to help open up discussions...." Read more

"...Book includes helpful scenarios, graphics and follow up suggestions from each chapter." Read more

"...Also, this book has cartoons to explain the theories, which is also good for you to share the knowledge of brain with your kids...." Read more

31 customers mention "Effectiveness"25 positive6 negative

Customers find the book's techniques and ideas for raising toddlers effective. They say it works well when put into practice, complements Montessori curriculum, and provides tools that actually work.

"...The authors' ability to successfully and fluently translate incredibly intricate science to the common reader..." Read more

"...This book is a must-read for any parent seeking a more empathetic, effective, and harmonious approach to raising children." Read more

"...In addition, the advice contained in the book is clear and effective...." Read more

"...this context, the writers introduce a philosophy and smart, effective techniques that resonate (at least they resonated with me)...." Read more

24 customers mention "Communication"24 positive0 negative

Customers find the book helpful for communicating with children. They say it provides strategies to connect better and resolve conflict. The book offers tips on how to engage and communicate effectively, avoiding yelling.

"...to be healthy and happy adults who value healthy and cooperative relationships with others...." Read more

"...They emphasize connection first with a narrative approach to healing which as an attachment parenting advocate and narrative therapist, you know I..." Read more

"...such as Name it to Tame it, Engage, don't Enrage, and Connect through Conflict, are but a few of the strategies the authors present in a..." Read more

"...It discusses communication strategies for connecting better with your child by integrating the whole brain (both logic and emotion) into your..." Read more

Such a fantastic book for good parenting
5 out of 5 stars
Such a fantastic book for good parenting
I feel so lucky to have encountered this book. The author did a fantastic job in demystifying children’s behaviors through scientific research on how young brain develops. I learnt a lot from this book and the knowledge will improve my parenting skills in the following days. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to be a good parent.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on January 29, 2024
    This book has changed the way I parent. I have two daughters, 1 and 6 years old. The oldest struggles with elevated levels of anxiety to the point where we decided to have her start chatting with a pediatric therapist to help her (and us) better navigate the tough moments. Her therapist recommends that all parents read this book. I am so thankful that I did. I not only understand more about my daughter’s brain and thought process and emotions, but I also understand more about myself, and how my handling of situations has projected my own anxiety onto her. The good news is that we can actually change our brains by forming new neural pathways, and it’s never too late to start. So you can take situations that normally upset your child (anxiety, fear, anger, violence, hyersilliness, nervousness, inability to focus – truly anything) and use these occurrences to help them form new neural pathways that in turn allow them to better cope with challenges. And it’s helped me in the same way. I’ve noticed I am better able to manage high-anxiety situations in general. This book does an amazing job at explaining just enough of the science to help the concepts make logical sense. For me, this makes them easier to remember and implement. After reading this book, I *get* it. And that makes all the difference in the world when you are in an emotional moment, struggling to best navigate not only your little one’s feelings but also your own. Beyond the concepts, this book provides practical, easy to understand techniques. And darn it if they don’t work. I noticed such a rapid response with my 6-year-old that I started using some of the approaches with my 1-year-old, and there was an immediate response with her as well. Getting such quick and positive feedback makes you excited to keep using the approaches. And it’s really set up to be as easy as possible. There is a helpful “HOW TO USE THIS BOOK” section at the beginning, I’ve included some snippets in my photos. I think this book is a game changer for parenting, and I wish I had read it earlier. I recommend this to any parent, new or veteran.
    Customer image
    5.0 out of 5 stars game changer for parenting
    Reviewed in the United States on January 29, 2024
    This book has changed the way I parent. I have two daughters, 1 and 6 years old. The oldest struggles with elevated levels of anxiety to the point where we decided to have her start chatting with a pediatric therapist to help her (and us) better navigate the tough moments. Her therapist recommends that all parents read this book. I am so thankful that I did. I not only understand more about my daughter’s brain and thought process and emotions, but I also understand more about myself, and how my handling of situations has projected my own anxiety onto her. The good news is that we can actually change our brains by forming new neural pathways, and it’s never too late to start. So you can take situations that normally upset your child (anxiety, fear, anger, violence, hyersilliness, nervousness, inability to focus – truly anything) and use these occurrences to help them form new neural pathways that in turn allow them to better cope with challenges. And it’s helped me in the same way. I’ve noticed I am better able to manage high-anxiety situations in general. This book does an amazing job at explaining just enough of the science to help the concepts make logical sense. For me, this makes them easier to remember and implement. After reading this book, I *get* it. And that makes all the difference in the world when you are in an emotional moment, struggling to best navigate not only your little one’s feelings but also your own. Beyond the concepts, this book provides practical, easy to understand techniques. And darn it if they don’t work. I noticed such a rapid response with my 6-year-old that I started using some of the approaches with my 1-year-old, and there was an immediate response with her as well. Getting such quick and positive feedback makes you excited to keep using the approaches. And it’s really set up to be as easy as possible. There is a helpful “HOW TO USE THIS BOOK” section at the beginning, I’ve included some snippets in my photos. I think this book is a game changer for parenting, and I wish I had read it earlier. I recommend this to any parent, new or veteran.
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    95 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on October 12, 2024
    Loved reading this so much. Lots of helpful and easy to understand information regarding child psych and development. This book brings to light how our little ones brains understand/react to things. The author does a great job at giving a bunch of relatable stories and everyday parenting experiences throughout. Easy and enjoyable to read, even my husband listened to it on audible. 5/5 stars 💓
    2 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on October 9, 2012
    As a father of three sons and a daughter and one of the grandfathers of their ten children, I can certainly understand what Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson have in mind while discussing moments of extreme stress for parents when their children become infuriating and intolerable. That is why I was intrigued by their explanation of the power of the "whole-brain approach" during all manner of touchpoints in parent-child relationships. That power is especially helpful in "the moments you are just trying to survive" because it creates "opportunities to help your child to thrive." In fact, the 12 strategies that Siegal and Bryson recommend can be effective for almost [begin italics] anyone [end italics] who has direct and frequent contact with children, including teachers, coaches, and clergy as well as parents and other relatives.

    In fact, with only minor modification, I think they can be beneficial to interactive relationships between and among adults, especially to those within a workplace.

    "What's great about this survive-and-thrive approach is that you don't have to try to carve out special time to help your children thrive. You can use [begin italics] all [end italics] of the interactions you share - the stressful, angry ones as well as the miraculous, adorable ones - as opportunities to help them become the responsible, caring, capable people you want them to be. That's what this book is about: using those everyday moments with your kids to help them reach their true potential."

    These are among the passages that caught my eye:

    o Integration of Various Mental Domains (Pages 6-10)
    o Get in the Flow: Navigating the Waters Between Chaos and Rigidity (10-13)
    o Left Brain, Right Brain: An Introduction (15-16)
    o Two Halves Make a Whole: Combining the Left and the Right (18-22)
    o The Mental Staircase: Integrating the Upstairs and Downstairs Brain (38-41)
    o Integrating Ourselves: Using Our Own Mental Staircase (64-65)
    o Integrating Implicit and Explicit: Assembling the Puzzle Pieces of the Mind (76-86)
    o Mindsight and the Wheel of Awareness (93-97)
    o Integrating Ourselves: Looking at Our Own Wheel of Awareness (117-118)
    o Laying the Groundwork for Connection: Creating Positive Mental Models (125-127)
    o Cultivating a "Yes" State of Mind: Helping Kids Be Receptive to Relationships (129-133)
    o Integrating Ourselves: Making Sense of Our Own Story (143-144)

    Note: I urge you to check out another of Siegal's books, Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation, in which Mindsight and the Wheel of Awareness are among the subjects discussed.

    Readers will appreciate Siegal and Bryson's skillful use of "What You Can Do" sections throughout their narrative that serve several purposes, notably focusing on key points while suggesting specific initiatives to apply what has been learned from the given material. For example, "What You Can Do: Helping Your Child Work from Both Sides of the Brain" (Pages 22-33). Dozens of eminently appropriate illustrations were created by Tuesday Mourning.

    However, no brief commentary such as mine could possibly do full justice to the scope and depth of what Siegal and Bryson cover, with eloquence as well as rigor. I have elected not to list the twelve (12) strategies because I think they are best revealed in context, within the narrative. I do presume to suggest that those who are about to read this book begin and then frequently review later the "Whole-Brain Ages and Stages" material (on Pages 154-168) because it creates a wide and deep context, a frame of reference, for the abundance of information, insights, and recommendations in the six preceding chapters and Conclusion, "Bringing It All Together. "

    This book need not be read straight through (although I prefer that approach) but it should certainly be consulted frequently, hence the importance of "Whole-Brain Ages and Stages" and the Index as well as (I hope) passages of special importance that have been highlighted.

    I also presume to suggest that Daniel Siegal and Tina Payne Bryson's brilliant book will be most valuable to whole-brain readers. In it, they provide what they characterize in the Introduction as "an antidote to parenting and academic approaches that overemphasize achievement and perfection at any cost." It is imperative that everyone involved directly (and even indirectly) with the development if children "understand some basics about the young brain that [they] are helping to grow and develop."
    133 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on August 17, 2024
    I firmly believe in understanding the brain and child development for effective parenting. Sure, other strategies may have a faster result, but the result isn't long lasting and can be harmful to the parent-child relationship. This book addresses brain development and how it relates to discipline/teaching children how to be healthy and happy adults who value healthy and cooperative relationships with others. Because let's be honest, they're only children for a small portion of their life. If you're a parent that feels like all other traditional methods have failed, I highly recommend giving this book a read. It was a quick, easy read, the literature was not difficult to understand. The examples were really good and feel like they can be applied to different scenarios easily. It feels like a lot of information at once, but we have implemented these strategies with my 3-year-old and already seen a massive change in behavior and demeanor towards us. 🖤🖤
    6 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2024
    I feel so lucky to have encountered this book. The author did a fantastic job in demystifying children’s behaviors through scientific research on how young brain develops. I learnt a lot from this book and the knowledge will improve my parenting skills in the following days. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to be a good parent.
    Customer image
    5.0 out of 5 stars Such a fantastic book for good parenting
    Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2024
    I feel so lucky to have encountered this book. The author did a fantastic job in demystifying children’s behaviors through scientific research on how young brain develops. I learnt a lot from this book and the knowledge will improve my parenting skills in the following days. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to be a good parent.
    Images in this review
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    Customer image

Top reviews from other countries

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  • Jade
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great read
    Reviewed in Canada on October 14, 2024
    Great strategies and ways to implement them throughout your child’s life. I feel like it was kept short and sweet - easy to read and understand.
  • Cliente Kindle
    5.0 out of 5 stars Bom
    Reviewed in Brazil on April 26, 2024
  • Qammar Afzaal
    5.0 out of 5 stars Really helpful !
    Reviewed in Saudi Arabia on November 14, 2024
    It helped me regulate my emotions and my kids emotions at the same time while he is throwing tantrum . It has helped me understand what’s happening in his brain when he is throwing tantrum so it’s a great buy .
  • Reghill J Manuel Raj
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book to understand brain development
    Reviewed in India on August 20, 2024
    I purchased this book to understand the brain development and how children think. But, this book goes beyond that. I could also relate to emotions of adults as well. This gives a clear picture of what right, left brain does, what is upstairs and downstairs brain, about implicit and explicit memories. This gives a fresh perspective. The strategies discussed in the book are presented with day to day issues we face with children and how to tackle. The best part is nothing discussed would need disciplined effort to bring it to practice. Very simple strategies and very easy to implement with change of perspective in how we handle issues of children. And I could also relate to my thoughts and feelings. Amazingly good. Definitely worth the read.
  • Sille Roganova
    5.0 out of 5 stars Whole brain
    Reviewed in Germany on August 9, 2024
    Wonderful book!! Very satisfied. Very nicely everything explained and easy to understand. Every parent should read it who have small kids or who are planning to have kids or why not to have for these parents who have done some mistakes but would like to understand how to make things better 🤗