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The Second Nine Months: One Woman Tells the REAL Truth About Becoming a Mom. Finally. Hardcover – January 7, 2008

4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 66 ratings

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I want to walk out of Target and leave Blair there, wailing . . . Nice people work at Target. Surely someone would take her home and care for her and buy her pretty things. So begins Vicki Glembocki's brutally honest yet hilarious memoir of her agonizing transition into motherhood. Why agonizing? Because no one told her how tough it would be. Finally, Glembocki lays out the truth about those first months with baby: the certainty that you're doing everything wrong; the desire to kill your husband, your mother, your dog; the struggle to balance who you were with whom you've become-a mother. Unlike any other book on motherhood, Glembocki breaks the New Mother Code of Silence, proving that "maternal bliss" is not innate, but learned. Funny and wise, she connects with new moms on a shockingly intimate level, letting them know that they are not alone.
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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Vicki Glembocki is a columnist for Women's Health and a writer-at-large at Philadelphia Magazine. She, her husband, Thad, and her two daughters live in southern New Jersey.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Da Capo Lifelong Books (January 7, 2008)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 272 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 073821101X
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0738211015
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 15.2 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 1 x 8.75 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 66 ratings

About the author

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Vicki Glembocki
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Vicki Glembocki is an award-winning magazine writer and essayist, author of the memoir The Second Nine Months: One Woman Tells the Real Truth About Becoming a Mom. Finally, a writer-at-large for Philadelphia Magazine, columnist for Reader's Digest. Her articles have appeared in many publications including Playboy, Women's Health, More, Parents, Babble, Ladies Home Journal, Fit Pregnancy, and Philadelphia. She specializes in personal essay, profiles, and all things narrative.

Before she began freelancing full time out of her very orange basement office, she was articles editor at Philadelphia magazine and senior editor at The Penn Stater, (before that, she worked at Pitt Magazine and at Dartmouth College and, in places in between, waitressed and sold roses from bar to bar dressed in a tuxedo jacket and cowboy boots). She has a BA in English and an MFA in nonfiction writing, both from Penn State, and has been a guest on radio and TV shows (Oprah!), led seminars at conferences, lectured in college classes, given public readings, sung karaoke, and performed in more than 100 plays and musicals (including two where she danced on stage naked).

She lives just outside of Philadelphia with her very patient husband, Thad. She is obsessed with yard sales, showtunes, yoga, DIY home repair, her Honda minivan, fountain Diet Coke, and her daughters, Blair and Drew.

Customer reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
4.4 out of 5
66 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Reviewed in the United States on March 3, 2009
I absolutely loved this book! I've had to read so many reference books on parenting that I needed a break & decided to read this. The book starts out a little melancholy but the author is telling the real story of what she's been through after becoming a mother. This is more of a novel than a short read that has you laughing.

I think people need to give the author a break about what she's divulging...it's her truth & her story. There were times I didn't understand what she was going through but that made me appreciate the fact that my daughter is much easier to care for than hers was. There were other times that what she said was dead on & yet other times that I couldn't believe the patience she had as a new mother (her breastfeeding ordeal!).

In the end, it's a wonderfully sweet story & I actually teared up & immediately put the book down & starting hugging & kissing my daughter. I'm so thankful that Vicki has written something that's so touching for us new moms out there.

If you're looking to escape for a few minutes, this book is great. If you're looking to laugh, try Sippy Cups are not for Chardonnay. I would definitely recommend this to any Mom who needs to put things into perspective. Thank you Vicki for such a wonderful story!!
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Reviewed in the United States on June 20, 2011
Being the 3rd mommy-oriented memoir I have read and after 5 different sleep books for babies, and being a new mom, this book felt like a support group for me. My baby is only 3 months old, and people often tell us "it gets easier" or more pessimistically they say "it doesn't get easier, it only gets different". However, we are currently going off little sleep, I just started to lose it mentally, and this book gave me the truth about my perspective on things. Often I fantasize about the next stage the baby will be in, say 6 months old, thinking, like the author, that we will be playing cards together, or something to expect from a teenager! To know that babies stay babies far longer than we expected, or desired, is actually helpful for just sitting back and relaxing about the baby. And to know that she used CIO successfully is both scary and reassuring to me. I don't want to get to that point, just as I don't want to get to the point of not being able to pump milk exclusively, but this book serves as my own personal support group for the options we choose as parents that we would rather not make.

This writer is talented and I hope she is working on more books.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 20, 2009
Let me say first: I'm so glad that Vicki wrote this book. Like the others of this genre that I've read in the past couple of years since I had my first child,  Inconsolable: How I Threw My Mental Health Out With the Diapers  and  A Life's Work: On Becoming a Mother , it adds to a reassurance of sorts that I'm not utterly alone. And that's what I'm looking for really.

Before I had children, the closest thing I had to exposure of mothers and babies consisted of those things you witness in a store. And there's usually two kinds of mothers (with a small fraction falling in between, and thus being less-noticeable) - the ones that are flogging overtired screaming kids at a time when any reasonable mother would have their child in bed, and you're thinking "Oh, poor kid, I am SO not going to be *that* kind of mother." And then there are these placid-looking women, their hair is done, they wear make-up and pretty (clean) clothes, and everything their kids say, they respond to with a sentence that ends in a high lilt. I don't suppose I really thought I'd be that kind of mom, but since I've had children, I've wondered, are these women really as happy and engrossed as the lilt would have you believe, or is it just part of the social we're-in-public script?

I've wondered how many women enter parenthood, having all their lives been utterly prepared to be independent, feminist, autonomous beings, only to have no preparation at all for the realities of motherhood?

As evidenced by the birth and rearing of my second child, preparation for the for the absolute worst case scenario can allow you to enjoy having any child-rearing situation that is the exception. Our first was 2 weeks sleepy, 5 months colicky (8-10 hour screaming spells. daily). Our second, though I expected her to be the same, was an entirely different - though not blissfully easy - baby. But I was prepared, and overall was better able to cope with the difficulties she presented (like when she developed eosinophilic proctocolitis at 4 months of age and began pooping blood).

So, unlike many of the terrified readers of this book, I think it should be mandatory pre-childbirth reading. I wish I had read this *before* having kids. Like my dad always said (almost jokingly, mind you), "Keep your expectations low and you'll rarely be disappointed." I mean, if you go into this whole venture knowing that you might not sleep for 5 months, that the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding contains only one true statement - and that's the title - and by the way, that some of just don't have what it takes to be great 'artists' - And if you know that babies sometimes don't just cry, they scream and scream and scream until your brain feels like its been in a blender, and you don't remember your own name, and you find yourself browsing the refrigerator when you intended to go pee, and you can't remember just how long you've been sitting there staring at that bottle of ketchup not understanding what you're seeing, and then... wait, what was I supposed to be doing again? When your life is turned freaking upside down, you can comfort yourself by saying you knew this could happen, and it isn't like a meteor dropped out of the sky and blasted everything you thought you knew and understood about the world out of existence. Maybe it could prevent that massive train wreck of disappointment, inadequacy, and self-loathing when all the sometimes-half-truths you read in the Sears' books turn out to have no relevance to you or your current situation.

So, I think that in a world where we don't communicate 'real' things as often as we should, that a book which lays out one woman's truth for all to pick apart and critique and maybe glean some profound new knowledge of motherhood from - whether it's applicable to your own situation or not - is an act of bravery and kindness to all women. I know that I still censor myself in daily conversations, and that I've avoided altogether writing about my experiences as a mother because I simply don't have the confidence to overcome the inevitable negative comments and blatant judgments (i.e. Vicki would have bonded with her baby if only she'd had a midwife) that this account of mothering and others like it draw.

So, why did I give it only four stars?

I wish I'd read it sooner. There were things in the book that didn't 'click' for me, because of differences in viewpoints, parenting styles, and there are certain parts of the book where Vicki portrays her attitude as being really cavalier on a number of occasions. I'm not sure if this is how she actually felt or what was conveyed by her style of writing and the distance she had from her situation when she began writing.

Too, I couldn't relate to virtually anything in the second half of the book. I've never gone back to work. And, in spite of my reservations about allowing the whole breastfeeding, co-sleeping, stay-at-home-mom thing (and all the many many details of trying to attain perfection in that area) rule my entire existence, they are things which for all practically purposes have swallowed the person I used to be an spat her out in some murky form I don't recognize or know what to do with. So maybe I'm a little envious of Vicki's release from a good percentage of the day-to-day drudgery and repetition of motherly duties, and her ability to find herself again. I don't think this works out so quickly for stay-at-home-moms. Or maybe I'm wrong and the rest of them are 'loving every minute of it'

In any case, I certainly wouldn't write the book off just because you, as a reader, might not agree with or understand every moment of it. The truths and the honesty it contains are worth far more than these small differences.
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Reviewed in the United States on February 9, 2012
Though I'm pregnant with #3, and by no means a new mom, I bought this book from some entertainment to get me through these last couple weeks of my current pregnancy.
What I found was a book I could have written many years ago, after having my first child. Oh, how I wish this book was around back then, because maybe I wouldn't have felt quite so alone. Like Vicki, I had a colicky child that screamed for basically the first six months of his life, despite our trying every method in every parenting book we could get out hands on (not to mention the countless trips to the doctor). This author perfectly captures the feelings of panic, alienation, isolation and desperation that can crop up when your motherhood experience goes NOTHING like you expected, or like any parenting book described. She gives a realistic voice to the self-conscious panic a mother feels when she tries to figure out her "high-needs" child, and her frustration when every parenting book, every piece of well-intentioned advice and every effort seems to have no effect.
Along with all the usual how-to parenting guides, all new moms should read this book, because this truly is the stuff that no one ever tells you.
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