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The Courage to Grieve: The Classic Guide to Creative Living, Recovery, and Growth Through Grief Paperback – June 17, 2008

by Judy Tatelbaum (Author)

4.6 162 ratings

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This unusual self-help book about surviving grief offers the reader comfort and inspiration. Each of us will face some loss, sorrow and disappointment in our lives, and The Courage to Grieve provides the specific help we need to enable us to face our grief fully and to recover and grow from the experience. Although the book emphasizes the response to the death of a loved one, The Courage to Grieve can help with every kind of loss and grief.

Judy Tatelbaum gives us a fresh look at understanding grief, showing us that grief is a natural, inevitable human experience, including all the unexpected, intense and uncomfortable emotions like sorrow, guilt, loneliness, resentment, confusion, or even the temporary loss of the will to live. The emphasis is to clarify and offer help, and the tone is spiritual, optimistic, creative and easy to understand. Judy Tatelbaum provides excellent advice on how to help oneself and others get through the immediate experience of death and the grief that follows, as well as how to understand the special grief of children. Particularly useful are the techniques for completing or "finishing" grief--counteracting the popular misconception that grief never ends. The Courage to Grieve shows us how to live life with the ultimate courage: not fearing death. This book is about so much more than death and grieving it is about life and joy and growth.

Print length

192 pages
Language

English
Publisher

William Morrow Paperbacks
Publication date

June 17, 2008
Dimensions

5.31 x 0.48 x 8 inches
ISBN-10

0060911859
ISBN-13

978-0060911850
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"The Courage to Grieve is a bright candle along a dark, mysterious path on which none of us are equipped to travelcoping with the loss of a loved one. But it contains, I believe, far more than many reasonable and logical suggestions for handling, with courage, our aching grief over the passing of another. This excellent and sensitive book also sheds considerable light on how each of us can learn to live, unafraid, among the always present reminders of our own unavoidable encounter with the shafts of death." -- Og Mandino

"The Courage to Grieve is a wise and helpful human document. It is written with sympathy and compassion. And it presents sound and sensible insights. The book should be helpful to those experiencing grief. Professionally the book will be a valuable aid to others who counsel with grieving persons." -- Norman Vincent Peale

"An excellent and tactical, valid book on all the aspects of grief and grief resolution, including important ideas about self-help and avenues to finish unfinished business and teach people how to let go. It is a well-done book written with wisdom and love, and makes people aware that every ending is also a new beginning." -- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D.

"I have never read a more clearly written, thorough and understanding book on the subject than The Courage to Grieve. Judy Tatelbaum has reached a desperately needed hand toward us alland her hand is truly helpful." -- Eugenia Price

"Sooner or later, each of us must experience grief. As unpleasant as it may be it is a reality we must face. The Courage to Grieve by Judy Tatelbaum serves a very important function in helping us face thatreality." -- Lee Salk, Ph.D.

About the Author

Judy Tatelbaum, M.S.W., attended both Syracuse University and the Simmons College School of Social Work in Boston. She worked for several years as a psychiatric social worker at the Payne Whitney Clinic of New York/Cornell Medical Center; the Columbia University School of Social Work; and the Massachusetts Mental Health Center. She now lives in Carmel Valley, California, where she has her private practice.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ William Morrow Paperbacks; 1st edition (June 17, 2008)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 192 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0060911859
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0060911850
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 6.2 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.31 x 0.48 x 8 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #178,621 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #470 in Grief & Bereavement
- #532 in Love & Loss
- #3,103 in Motivational Self-Help (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.6 162 ratings

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4.6 out of 5

162 global ratings

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Debora4

Specific steps to deal with serious loss and rebuild your life

Reviewed in the United States on October 10, 2021

Verified Purchase

I lost my otherwise young (59), very healthy husband 17 months ago to brain cancer a year after diagnosis. I have since read a number of books looking for answers to dealing with what was, for me, a devastating loss during a very bad time (pandemic; unable to see people who might otherwise have been my support). Our children are grown with families and lives of their own; I live by myself (with my lovely boxer dog). I'm in grief therapy (Zoom, works well for me) and I was on an anti-depressant for about 8 months. I bought this book at the right time. It takes time to get through the shock of such a diagnosis (glioblastoma, very very low survival rate, no cure in sight yet), and more time to finally accept the loss is permanent; "your" person, your partner, is not coming back. Then comes, at least for me, the need to rebuild my life. Not to pile on, but I am also an introvert. This book is brief, well written and direct, and it provides specific steps to re-focus attention on living life as fully as my husband would want for me, and for myself as well. For instance, the author gives an example of a young acquaintance who made a list of Thing to do When Alone. The author discusses the idea of "environmental supports" and lists ideas in two categories of "people" and "other," such as courses that interest you, jobs or job changes, moving, volunteer work, clubs, live music, art, self-help groups, etc. She goes beyond that to describe how important it is, when stuck in inertia, to care for yourself by taking actual steps to move out of the inertia comfort zone. The book itself is divided into Parts such as "The Grief Experience," "The Recovery Process, and "Grief Resolution," each broken into concise chapters with clear explanations and goals. One chapter in Grief Resolution especially was helpful, called simply "Finishing." It describes a process of "finishing" that apparently comes from Gestalt therapy that explains how someone can choose to "reinvest in (their) lives" after the death has been accepted. The steps or process to get to the point of acceptance involves "directly experiencing or expressing anew or again all the emotions connected with the unfinished situation, experiencing the full impact again in the now, until all the feelings are dissipated...to move feelings or experiences from foreground to background, to gain relief, and to attain some shift in perspective." For me, this concept is transformative. This chapter gave me permission to let go while not forgetting, even though I am not quite ready to do so yet. It's like a gift of peace waiting for me. I know I will get there, but the point I am making is that this book opened my eyes to this part of the process, helped me name it and then understand it. I have read other books this past year that have helped, among them "The Joke's Over; You Can Come Back Now" by Laurie Burrows Grad and "A Grief Observed" by C.S. Lewis. And later, "Gaining Traction: Starting Over After the Death of Your Life Partner" by Vicki Panagotacos and "It's OK That You're Not OK" by Megan Devine. These were very good for me at different stages. But "The Courage To Grieve" (recommended by my excellent grief therapist, btw) was the perfect book for me when I bought it September 4, 2021 and today. Everyone's loss and grief timeline is different, but this book can help.

8 people found this helpful

Helpful

Kate

Very Helpful

Reviewed in the United States on June 21, 2023

Verified Purchase

This book has helped me through the loss of more than one loved-one. It is easy to read and to apply. I read one chapter at a time and then reflect. Have given it to several friends and to a mental health professional for use in her practice. Highly recommend it. When you get it, read it! There is a tendency to not pick up books and to reach for help when we need it most. This is a tool you will be grateful for.

One person found this helpful

Helpful

DALENE F.

Awesome book for someone dealing with the loss of a loved one, etc.

Reviewed in the United States on March 15, 2020

Verified Purchase

My mom was given this book when my dad died. She was only 36 and my dad was 39 and this loss hit her so hard. This book helps explain all the stages you will go through when you lose someone you love. It truly is a "One-size fits All" book. Everyone is different and grieves in different ways and this lets you know that you are ok and this too shall pass.

I purchased a copy as a spare to give to a friend or family member when they lose someone close to them. This is one of the best books to own and to give as a gift. I know this sounds maybe a little kooky, but believe me when I say, when you or a loved one loses someone they love, such as a husband, wife or partner, etc., you will need this book to help you/them through the grieving process. It helps to know that you are ok in your grieving and what you can expect.

This book is even great to read before the loss of someone you love. Knowledge is power, ignorance leads to even worse depression, etc. when you lose someone you love.

This book is truly God's gift!

7 people found this helpful

Helpful

Darlene K. Bogle

A great book to read and share with others

Reviewed in the United States on May 26, 2013

Verified Purchase

Lots of helpful tips as someone goes through the loss of a loved one. I read and marked it up, then passed it on to a man who had recently lost his wife. It takes courage to say we don't have all the answers and need help along the way.

One person found this helpful

Helpful

CA-Claire

Best book on the grieving process I’ve ever read.

Reviewed in the United States on October 27, 2021

Verified Purchase

Excellent book. I was given several books after I lost my husband 12 years ago. The other books actually made me feel worse. This one describes the different stages, and also how children grieve. Very well written. I keep a small supply on hand for those which go through loss to try to help them.

4 people found this helpful

Helpful

NC grandmother

Glad to find this title

Reviewed in the United States on January 2, 2021

Verified Purchase

okay not sure I would have called the book "good" no writing or notes within but quite a bit of wear and the cover not in good shape. I have bought many, many books online (dozens) and this one does not match up with a "good" designation I am accustomed to receiving, but I wanted the book and I am glad to get it.

2 people found this helpful

Helpful

cathy parker

A very important reading to help you through your grief.

Reviewed in the United States on February 24, 2013

Verified Purchase

I was given this book after my husband died unexpectedly in an auto accident at 56 years old. No other book helped me more to get through my grief. I read it and re-read it and highlighted points I needed to read again. I read parts of the book to my three sons which helped them to understand that is was okay to see their mother cry and also alright to cry themselves. Since that time in 1989, I have purchased and given this book to many others who have lost loved ones. My two sons are financial advisers and manage many older clients, and they have purchased large supplies to give clients who have lost loved ones. I strongly recommend this book.

4 people found this helpful

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Keli Staggers

Must read

Reviewed in the United States on December 5, 2022

Verified Purchase

I bought a used paperback book because I plan to share this. I need to read this to help me with my own path of dealing with grief. And then I will share it with others who need it.

One person found this helpful

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