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Change: What Really Leads to Lasting Personal Transformation Reprint Edition

by Jeffrey A. Kottler (Author)
4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 40 ratings
See all formats and editions
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Change is often a mystery, one that baffles doctors, therapists, teachers, coaches, parents--and especially those of us who struggle to alter our own bad habits or make lasting improvements in our lives. Why do we suddenly change for the better after years of failed efforts? Why do some of us never escape our self-destructive behaviors, even when we desperately want to? What is it that most reliably and effectively produces growth, learning, and development that persist over time?

In this vividly written volume, psychotherapist Jeffrey Kottler weaves together inspiring stories and the latest research, taking the reader on a fascinating exploration of human behavior while highlighting what does--and does not--lead to lasting change. Kottler illuminates our many efforts to change--to stop taking drugs, reduce dependencies, leave a destructive relationship, find new and more meaningful work, or adjust to a devastating accident or trauma. Readers are invited to explore key triggers such as hitting bottom, moments of clarity, the power of altruism and service, travel to new surroundings, reading or listening to stories, religious conversion, and much more. Kottler also explores why most changes don't last and what we can do to prevent relapses.

Throughout the book, Kottler recounts stories of colleagues and patients--and even recalls episodes from his own life-often moving tales of remarkable, unexpected, and lasting transformation. He looks, for instance, at a young black basketball star, confined to a wheelchair for life after being shot four times, who turned his life around, becoming a scholar and a PhD.

An intriguing glimpse into the complexity of the human psyche, Change will engage anyone who has ever struggled to alter a habit, enrich relationships, recover from disappointment or failure, strive for more meaningful and productive work, deal with anxiety, loneliness, fears, stress, and depression, or transform their lives in any kind of significant way.
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  1. ISBN-10
    0190866853
  2. ISBN-13
    978-0190866853
  3. Edition
    Reprint
  4. Publisher
    Oxford University Press
  5. Publication date
    April 1, 2018
  6. Language
    English
  7. Dimensions
    9.4 x 0.9 x 6.3 inches
  8. Print length
    376 pages
  9. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Book Description

A leading authority in transformative personal changes offers an insightful look at the mysteries and certainties of the process

About the Author

Jeffrey A. Kottler is one of the foremost authorities and prolific writers in the fields of counseling, psychology, and education. He is the best-selling author of more than 80 nonfiction books that deal with a wide range of subjects, including a variety of contemporary issues related to helping and healing, truth and lies, creativity, transformative travel, and stress management. He is Professor of Counseling at California State University, Fullerton, and President of Empower Nepali Girls, an organization that provides scholarships for at-risk children in Nepal.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Oxford University Press; Reprint edition (April 1, 2018)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 376 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0190866853
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0190866853
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.18 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 9.4 x 0.9 x 6.3 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 40 ratings

About the author

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Jeffrey A. Kottler

Jeffrey A. Kottler

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Jeffrey A. Kottler is one of the most prominent authors in the fields of counseling, psychotherapy, health, education, and advocacy having written over 100 books about a wide range of subjects. Some of his most highly regarded works include On Being a Therapist, Creative Breakthroughs in Therapy, Bad Therapy, The Client Who Changed Me, Divine Madness, Stories We've Heard, Stories We've Told: Life-Changing Narratives in Therapy and Everyday Life, The Therapist in the Real World, Relationships in Counseling and the Counselor's Life, Therapy Over 50, On Being a Master Therapist, Secrets of Exceptional Counselors.

Jeffrey has also written several successful trade books about a variety of psychological themes: Private Moments, Secret Selves, Divine Madness: Ten Stories of Creative Struggle, Change: What Leads to Personal Transformation, What You Don't Know About Leadership But Probably Should, and the best-selling true crime book, The Last Victim: Inside the Minds of Serial Killers that was produced as a feature film (Dear Mr. Gacy).

Jeffrey has been a counselor, therapist, supervisor, and educator for 45 years, having worked a preschool, middle school, mental health center, crisis center, hospital, medical school, refugee resettlement agency, nongovernmental organization (NGO), university, community college, private practice, and disaster relief settings. He is also the founder of Empower Nepali Girls, a foundation that supports and mentors at-risk children He has served as a Fulbright scholar and senior lecturer in Peru and Iceland, as well as worked as a visiting professor in New Zealand, Australia, Hong Kong, Singapore, and Nepal. Jeffrey is Professor Emeritus of Counseling at California State University, Fullerton and is Clinical Professor in the Menninger Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Science at the Baylor College of Medicine. He currently lives in Houston where he works on projects related to refugee trauma with the Alliance for Multicultural Services.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
4.5 out of 5
40 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Richard Shum
5.0 out of 5 stars Change happens due to many reasons
Reviewed in the United States on September 12, 2018
Verified Purchase
The writer brings us along a thoughtful and open journey into what can lead to change, without being overly prescriptive or dogmatic... there is no one answer for all, but he gives pointers to elements that could help build a strategy for change, whilst asking to keep an open mind to the results.

Definitely recommended!
5 people found this helpful
Helpful
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Fiefer's mom
5.0 out of 5 stars Totally recommmend
Reviewed in the United States on August 14, 2015
Verified Purchase
I like how he integrates all the different philosophies of change. Plus, I really like his writing style. It's meant to answer those internal questions one has, that pop up as we read. Now, if I can actually implement these changes I'll be somewhere. I'm using some of the suggested ways, but I'm also mindful of the mental garbage that stops me and I'm changing my thoughts. That's where it starts.
5 people found this helpful
Helpful
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Frederick Coleman
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in the United States on February 4, 2015
Verified Purchase
Very useful for teachnig
One person found this helpful
Helpful
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ThePolyBlog
5.0 out of 5 stars It gave me the courage to get unstuck after 30 years
Reviewed in the United States on December 17, 2018
PLOT OR PREMISE:
Kottler reflects on the literature and personal experiences as a psychologist about the elements that lead people to not only make changes in their life but also sustain those changes over the long-term
.
WHAT I LIKED:
I had the pleasure of hearing Kottler speak as an honoured guest at my wife's university graduation ceremony, and he intrigued me enough on the subject of "change" -- what we know and what we don't know -- that I bought his book. It was the perfect book for me at this point in my life, as I've been wanting to make a significant change that has been holding me back for at least 30 years. I'm great at the day to day goal-setting stuff, but I needed to understand large scale change on a deeper level, and this book was ideal for that education. At the beginning, I was struck by a central question -- when does an alteration in attitudes, beliefs, behaviour, thinking, or feeling “count” as change, and how long does it have to last in order to qualify? In shorter terms, when does a temporary change become permanent and sustainable? Chapter 2 was an eye-opener -- hidden benefits from my current approach that resist change. Not the obvious ones but more internal ones that might even seem like positive traits in someone (being strong, standing up for oneself disguising some issues with temper, for instance). And some baby step coping techniques. Chapter 3 dealt more with the conditions that allow you to transition from temporary to permanent change, almost pre-conditions in some cases. Other chapters were relatively straight-forward: the power of story-telling (chapter 4); hitting bottom in various forms (chapter 5); how you react to trauma and whether it can be a positive catalyst (chapter 6); the limits to psychotherapy (chapter 7); change through physical travel or spiritual journeys (chapter 8); moments of clarity (chapter 9); and resolving conflicts in relationships (chapter 13). The last chapter -- Why Changes Don't Often Last (Chapter 14) -- was one that I was most looking forward in the book, and while he goes into various spins and examples, most of it seems to come down to varying forms of fear. It certainly did for me, and I find the chapter fantastic for presenting it quite concisely. In the end, the price of the book is worth it just to get the 7 pages at the end, if you have time for nothing else (308-315). I managed to use it create a six-part "to do" list / game plan for the change that I've been wanting to make, and for the first time in my life, I'm doing it. I'm six months in and it seems to be holding. It'll take another 18 months to "finish", but the book helped me get there. Onward to the journey!
.
WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE:
Several chapters didn't really sing as well as the rest. Being happy (chapter 11) and transformation while helping others (12) were relatively bland, and a chapter on the importance of social capital (chapter 10) seemed almost like an afterthought.
.
DISCLOSURE:
I received no compensation, not even a free copy, in exchange for this review. I am not personal friends with the author, nor do I follow him on social media.
7 people found this helpful
Helpful
 Report
arizonamegs
4.0 out of 5 stars Great resource
Reviewed in the United States on May 23, 2016
Verified Purchase
A classic...I have used in both undergraduate and graduate classes and always find this book well received by students. A great resource.
3 people found this helpful
Helpful
 Report
QualityLady
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical advice on personal change - no gimmicks, no pandering, just self-reflection, support, patience and a desire to change!
Reviewed in the United States on August 14, 2016
First stumbled upon this book at my local library and after reading it I decided to buy it. I have applied so many of the tidbits, lessons, insights of this book to my life then I cannot emphasize enough the impact it has had on my life. I highly recommend it.
5 people found this helpful
Helpful
 Report
biplob
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Book!!!
Reviewed in the United States on November 10, 2014
Personally I loved this book! This book will be a great help to gain a deeper understanding about the process of change!
Helpful
 Report

Top reviews from other countries

ThePolyBlog
5.0 out of 5 stars It gave me the courage to get unstuck after 30 years
Reviewed in Canada on December 17, 2018
Verified Purchase
PLOT OR PREMISE:
Kottler reflects on the literature and personal experiences as a psychologist about the elements that lead people to not only make changes in their life but also sustain those changes over the long-term
.
WHAT I LIKED:
I had the pleasure of hearing Kottler speak as an honoured guest at my wife's university graduation ceremony, and he intrigued me enough on the subject of "change" -- what we know and what we don't know -- that I bought his book. It was the perfect book for me at this point in my life, as I've been wanting to make a significant change that has been holding me back for at least 30 years. I'm great at the day to day goal-setting stuff, but I needed to understand large scale change on a deeper level, and this book was ideal for that education. At the beginning, I was struck by a central question -- when does an alteration in attitudes, beliefs, behaviour, thinking, or feeling “count” as change, and how long does it have to last in order to qualify? In shorter terms, when does a temporary change become permanent and sustainable? Chapter 2 was an eye-opener -- hidden benefits from my current approach that resist change. Not the obvious ones but more internal ones that might even seem like positive traits in someone (being strong, standing up for oneself disguising some issues with temper, for instance). And some baby step coping techniques. Chapter 3 dealt more with the conditions that allow you to transition from temporary to permanent change, almost pre-conditions in some cases. Other chapters were relatively straight-forward: the power of story-telling (chapter 4); hitting bottom in various forms (chapter 5); how you react to trauma and whether it can be a positive catalyst (chapter 6); the limits to psychotherapy (chapter 7); change through physical travel or spiritual journeys (chapter 8); moments of clarity (chapter 9); and resolving conflicts in relationships (chapter 13). The last chapter -- Why Changes Don't Often Last (Chapter 14) -- was one that I was most looking forward in the book, and while he goes into various spins and examples, most of it seems to come down to varying forms of fear. It certainly did for me, and I find the chapter fantastic for presenting it quite concisely. In the end, the price of the book is worth it just to get the 7 pages at the end, if you have time for nothing else (308-315). I managed to use it create a six-part "to do" list / game plan for the change that I've been wanting to make, and for the first time in my life, I'm doing it. I'm six months in and it seems to be holding. It'll take another 18 months to "finish", but the book helped me get there. Onward to the journey!
.
WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE:
Several chapters didn't really sing as well as the rest. Being happy (chapter 11) and transformation while helping others (12) were relatively bland, and a chapter on the importance of social capital (chapter 10) seemed almost like an afterthought.
.
DISCLOSURE:
I received no compensation, not even a free copy, in exchange for this review. I am not personal friends with the author, nor do I follow him on social media.
2 people found this helpful
 Report
Twifik
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye opener
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 26, 2016
Verified Purchase
Excellent book, 5 stars. Really enjoyed the stories, brings the transformation process alive.
Customer image
Twifik
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye opener
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 26, 2016
Excellent book, 5 stars. Really enjoyed the stories, brings the transformation process alive.
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