In both this book and his podcast, Dr. Mike makes big ideas and difficult "heart work" manageable and enjoyable. He breaks things down so well! He has a beautiful heart, and it shows through in his writing.
NOTE OF CAUTION:
This is not criticism, per se, but just a word of caution for the purchaser who might be considering this as a gift because you're trying to be helpful for someone else in your life who seems really stuck:
This book is likely going to resonate really well with people who are known for already being high performers. (You'll be able to spot this type because we're the sort who tend to beat ourselves up for the rare bouts of less disciplined life planning, we set high standards for ourselves then get really frustrated when we don't live up to our self-imposed expectations, we're up at 5a running drills even without a coach, and we're the up and coming business people/scholars who willingly work late into the night to ensure any job we do is excellent, etc. We like -- and need -- to know that we're living meaningful lives of purpose, accomplishing lasting goals that benefit others, not just ourselves, and we're very driven to follow through.)
Just know that if the person you are purchasing this book for would not be described like that, this might not be the right selection YET.
I mention that NOT as criticism of his book, because I love this book and I follow Dr. Mike like some people follow a religion-- he quite literally saved my life and he speaks straight to my inner dialogue as if he is INSIDE my brain. But I am a high performer by nature. His presentation style works to UNSTUCK me rather than add undue pressure.
So my only caution here is that if you are someone on the good-hearted hunt for a book that might help someone you care greatly about but who seems very stuck, but you're not sure how to help them, just proceed with caution here. If you found this book, you might be a high performer personality and might not see that this framework is not inclusively relevant to all personality types.
If the person you're trying to help isn't someone who you've already observed showcasing "high performer" traits, there might be other literature to start with first BEFORE they will THEN be ready to return here be ready to receive and lift off with Dr. Mike's framework.
(I say this because I'm simultaneously reading a similar book because negative self-talk is something that really burdens me. I wanted to get a few different perspectives. The other book is Blessing My Demons by Forbrook, which I chose because there are many complementary parallels between Dr. Mike's book. An interview between him and the other author, Chelsea Forbrook, would be super cool, though! They're discussing the exact same thing, but I just wonder if he'd be open to considering how his framework could be even more inclusively relevant if he expanded his thinking/approach just a bit.)
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Popular Highlights in this book
“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.”Highlighted by 861 Kindle readers- Hence, the first rule of mastery requires looking within and fundamentally committing to work on mastering what’s 100 percent under your control. There is nothing else that can be mastered. This is the essence of the path.Highlighted by 668 Kindle readers
- The sooner you fundamentally change your relationship with other people’s opinions, the sooner you become free. Totally free to be at home with yourself wherever you are.Highlighted by 587 Kindle readers
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Worth It? What I Got From It. The First Rule Of Mastery
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Reviews with images
Great for High Performers + Note of caution for NON-high performers
In both this book and his podcast, Dr. Mike makes big ideas and difficult "heart work" manageable and enjoyable. He breaks things down so well! He has a beautiful heart, and it shows through in his writing.NOTE OF CAUTION:This is not criticism, per se, but just a word of caution for the purchaser who might be considering this as a gift because you're trying to be helpful for someone else in your life who seems really stuck:This book is likely going to resonate really well with people who are known for already being high performers. (You'll be able to spot this type because we're the sort who tend to beat ourselves up for the rare bouts of less disciplined life planning, we set high standards for ourselves then get really frustrated when we don't live up to our self-imposed expectations, we're up at 5a running drills even without a coach, and we're the up and coming business people/scholars who willingly work late into the night to ensure any job we do is excellent, etc. We like -- and need -- to know that we're living meaningful lives of purpose, accomplishing lasting goals that benefit others, not just ourselves, and we're very driven to follow through.)Just know that if the person you are purchasing this book for would not be described like that, this might not be the right selection YET.I mention that NOT as criticism of his book, because I love this book and I follow Dr. Mike like some people follow a religion-- he quite literally saved my life and he speaks straight to my inner dialogue as if he is INSIDE my brain. But I am a high performer by nature. His presentation style works to UNSTUCK me rather than add undue pressure.So my only caution here is that if you are someone on the good-hearted hunt for a book that might help someone you care greatly about but who seems very stuck, but you're not sure how to help them, just proceed with caution here. If you found this book, you might be a high performer personality and might not see that this framework is not inclusively relevant to all personality types.If the person you're trying to help isn't someone who you've already observed showcasing "high performer" traits, there might be other literature to start with first BEFORE they will THEN be ready to return here be ready to receive and lift off with Dr. Mike's framework.(I say this because I'm simultaneously reading a similar book because negative self-talk is something that really burdens me. I wanted to get a few different perspectives. The other book is Blessing My Demons by Forbrook, which I chose because there are many complementary parallels between Dr. Mike's book. An interview between him and the other author, Chelsea Forbrook, would be super cool, though! They're discussing the exact same thing, but I just wonder if he'd be open to considering how his framework could be even more inclusively relevant if he expanded his thinking/approach just a bit.)
Top reviews from the United States
There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later.
Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2023
NOTE OF CAUTION:
This is not criticism, per se, but just a word of caution for the purchaser who might be considering this as a gift because you're trying to be helpful for someone else in your life who seems really stuck:
This book is likely going to resonate really well with people who are known for already being high performers. (You'll be able to spot this type because we're the sort who tend to beat ourselves up for the rare bouts of less disciplined life planning, we set high standards for ourselves then get really frustrated when we don't live up to our self-imposed expectations, we're up at 5a running drills even without a coach, and we're the up and coming business people/scholars who willingly work late into the night to ensure any job we do is excellent, etc. We like -- and need -- to know that we're living meaningful lives of purpose, accomplishing lasting goals that benefit others, not just ourselves, and we're very driven to follow through.)
Just know that if the person you are purchasing this book for would not be described like that, this might not be the right selection YET.
I mention that NOT as criticism of his book, because I love this book and I follow Dr. Mike like some people follow a religion-- he quite literally saved my life and he speaks straight to my inner dialogue as if he is INSIDE my brain. But I am a high performer by nature. His presentation style works to UNSTUCK me rather than add undue pressure.
So my only caution here is that if you are someone on the good-hearted hunt for a book that might help someone you care greatly about but who seems very stuck, but you're not sure how to help them, just proceed with caution here. If you found this book, you might be a high performer personality and might not see that this framework is not inclusively relevant to all personality types.
If the person you're trying to help isn't someone who you've already observed showcasing "high performer" traits, there might be other literature to start with first BEFORE they will THEN be ready to return here be ready to receive and lift off with Dr. Mike's framework.
(I say this because I'm simultaneously reading a similar book because negative self-talk is something that really burdens me. I wanted to get a few different perspectives. The other book is Blessing My Demons by Forbrook, which I chose because there are many complementary parallels between Dr. Mike's book. An interview between him and the other author, Chelsea Forbrook, would be super cool, though! They're discussing the exact same thing, but I just wonder if he'd be open to considering how his framework could be even more inclusively relevant if he expanded his thinking/approach just a bit.)
Great for High Performers + Note of caution for NON-high performers
Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2023
In both this book and his podcast, Dr. Mike makes big ideas and difficult "heart work" manageable and enjoyable. He breaks things down so well! He has a beautiful heart, and it shows through in his writing.Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2023
NOTE OF CAUTION:
This is not criticism, per se, but just a word of caution for the purchaser who might be considering this as a gift because you're trying to be helpful for someone else in your life who seems really stuck:
This book is likely going to resonate really well with people who are known for already being high performers. (You'll be able to spot this type because we're the sort who tend to beat ourselves up for the rare bouts of less disciplined life planning, we set high standards for ourselves then get really frustrated when we don't live up to our self-imposed expectations, we're up at 5a running drills even without a coach, and we're the up and coming business people/scholars who willingly work late into the night to ensure any job we do is excellent, etc. We like -- and need -- to know that we're living meaningful lives of purpose, accomplishing lasting goals that benefit others, not just ourselves, and we're very driven to follow through.)
Just know that if the person you are purchasing this book for would not be described like that, this might not be the right selection YET.
I mention that NOT as criticism of his book, because I love this book and I follow Dr. Mike like some people follow a religion-- he quite literally saved my life and he speaks straight to my inner dialogue as if he is INSIDE my brain. But I am a high performer by nature. His presentation style works to UNSTUCK me rather than add undue pressure.
So my only caution here is that if you are someone on the good-hearted hunt for a book that might help someone you care greatly about but who seems very stuck, but you're not sure how to help them, just proceed with caution here. If you found this book, you might be a high performer personality and might not see that this framework is not inclusively relevant to all personality types.
If the person you're trying to help isn't someone who you've already observed showcasing "high performer" traits, there might be other literature to start with first BEFORE they will THEN be ready to return here be ready to receive and lift off with Dr. Mike's framework.
(I say this because I'm simultaneously reading a similar book because negative self-talk is something that really burdens me. I wanted to get a few different perspectives. The other book is Blessing My Demons by Forbrook, which I chose because there are many complementary parallels between Dr. Mike's book. An interview between him and the other author, Chelsea Forbrook, would be super cool, though! They're discussing the exact same thing, but I just wonder if he'd be open to considering how his framework could be even more inclusively relevant if he expanded his thinking/approach just a bit.)
Images in this review
Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2023
I have been following Dr. Gervais and his team for years now since I first started listening to his podcast "Finding Mastery". On this podcast, he brings on some of the best athletes, leaders & performers from all over the world and has deep, open, honest, and insightful conversations with them. They range from lighthearted banter, finishing statements, and quick rapid fire questions to some really really raw questions about insecurity, fear, and - FOPO.
This book is a culmination of a lot of those conversations. The research and story telling in this book reminds us to look inward and to be forgiving to ourselves. To find our own power, trust it and to genuinely anchor deep into it. We all know what it's like to feel the stares we get from other people and focus on the fear and anxiety that that kind of feeling brings. Dr. Gervais is able to so easily explain that feeling and break it down as a completely normal part of life. He is able to relate to it himself, as well as call upon countless stories from his time as one of the world's best high-performance psychologists and probably overall just being a good dude. Thank you and your team for all of the hard work that went into this book, it has made a profound impact in my life! It's so good I bought 10 for my dearest friends and family!
- Scott, guy with fopo
Powerful, insightful, and incredibly relatable.
Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2023
Dr. Michael Gervais' first book, "The First Rule of Mastery: Stop Worrying About What Other People Think of You", is for anyone and everyone.Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2023
I have been following Dr. Gervais and his team for years now since I first started listening to his podcast "Finding Mastery". On this podcast, he brings on some of the best athletes, leaders & performers from all over the world and has deep, open, honest, and insightful conversations with them. They range from lighthearted banter, finishing statements, and quick rapid fire questions to some really really raw questions about insecurity, fear, and - FOPO.
This book is a culmination of a lot of those conversations. The research and story telling in this book reminds us to look inward and to be forgiving to ourselves. To find our own power, trust it and to genuinely anchor deep into it. We all know what it's like to feel the stares we get from other people and focus on the fear and anxiety that that kind of feeling brings. Dr. Gervais is able to so easily explain that feeling and break it down as a completely normal part of life. He is able to relate to it himself, as well as call upon countless stories from his time as one of the world's best high-performance psychologists and probably overall just being a good dude. Thank you and your team for all of the hard work that went into this book, it has made a profound impact in my life! It's so good I bought 10 for my dearest friends and family!
- Scott, guy with fopo
Images in this review
Reviewed in the United States on November 11, 2023
Been a follower, student and listener of Dr. Gervais for ~5 years. Each time, it's a game changer and a way to level up. This book is that too - the amount of 'ah-has' I had while reading it made me dig even deeper.
One of the many things I love is it gets you to think about how much influence other peoples opinions have on your everyday life, then become more aware and be able to be more at choice. At work and at life. And all based in research with practical application and exercises, not anxiety-inducing quick-fix BS. Consistent work over time makes the change. It's not that I haven't worked on these things before and still do, but it's confirming that we're so much more at choice in our thoughts, words actions than we sometimes give ourselves credit for. The ability to choose what to let it, how to react, rather than be driven by it. And doing to work to manage the worry so as to unlock more of your potential. Moreover, how about learning to show up more for yourself than for someone else's opinion? The stories/examples in here are riveting, relatable and fascinating (aka can't put down the book) and make the practical content and accessible concepts really come to life.
It's an incredibly validating and motivating book, the real deal.
One of the many things I love is it gets you to think about how much influence other peoples opinions have on your everyday life, then become more aware and be able to be more at choice. At work and at life. And all based in research with practical application and exercises, not anxiety-inducing quick-fix BS. Consistent work over time makes the change. It's not that I haven't worked on these things before and still do, but it's confirming that we're so much more at choice in our thoughts, words actions than we sometimes give ourselves credit for. The ability to choose what to let it, how to react, rather than be driven by it. And doing to work to manage the worry so as to unlock more of your potential. Moreover, how about learning to show up more for yourself than for someone else's opinion? The stories/examples in here are riveting, relatable and fascinating (aka can't put down the book) and make the practical content and accessible concepts really come to life.
It's an incredibly validating and motivating book, the real deal.
Images in this review
Reviewed in the United States on November 9, 2023
Top reviews from other countries
Ibrahim Hadad
A masterpiece because of its simplicity
Reviewed in Germany on March 9, 2024